Is there a term for this? Most people seem to suffer from it

someone else again: …my point was, it's not always best to assume that a person's attitude is in directly relation to you. I've had people yell and scream at me at my work only to find out that they're simply frustrated about everything else. This was the straw that broke the camel's back, so to speak, and it had zero to do with me.

Erimitus: Oh, I seemed to have missed your point. Doh! Yes you are correct and this is the case more often than not. I did not understand, which is also the case more often than not.

its all in the mind. No really everything external is an internal representation in our mind.

Anyway that a side.

You can either blame yourself. Sometimes its good to re frame so you believe the other person is at all fault.

If you always ask yourself what you dud wrong then correct you will improve and get further towards being your best self.

An example would be if im sparring and I get beaten. I have two choices, I can either tell myself my opponent was better and leave it at that. Or I can tell myself my kicks could of been better and so could my parries. I then go and improve these areas and next time I spar I get a different result.

parties either view is right or wrong, its just a perception. However one view serves no purpose but to limit you.

at some point wernt our friends strangers?

Sort of like this....?



(No attack here... just trying to grasp the idea. )

Those aren't horrifically different. If your kicks and parries could have been better then the other guy may be better. There's nothing wrong with either perspective and they are essentially the same.

The other option would be to say that your shoes (which I initially thought you meant when you said "kicks"...stupid slang) could have been better and it was all your gear's fault....that's shifting blame.

Yes, but do you plan to become bosom buddies with the door guard at the Smithsonian when you don't even live in the same state? Probably not. There are some people who will remain random strangers...usually at your own behest.

someone_else_again: It’s all in the mind. No really everything external is an internal representation in our mind.

Erimitus: there are Internalist and externalist concepts of perception. Are you an Internalist, saying that nothing exists independent of the mind? I am pretty sure that I exist. Are you saying that there is no similarity between that which is perceived and that which is?

someone_else_again: You can either blame yourself. Sometimes it’s good to re frame so you believe the other person is at all fault.

Erimiutus: Ok, I understand so far…

someone_else_again: If you always ask yourself what you did wrong then correct you will improve and get further towards being your best self.

Erimitus: yes…

someone_else_again: An example would be if I’m sparring and I get beaten. I have two choices, I can either tell myself my opponent was better and leave it at that. Or I can tell myself my kicks could have been better and so could my parries. I then go and improve these areas and next time I spar I get a different result.

Erimitus: my approach to physical altercations is to attempt to run away. If I cannot run then I grovel. I am good at groveling; I have had a lot of practice. The next time I grovel I may have improved my technique enough to keep my lunch money.

someone_else_again: Parties either view is right or wrong, it’s just a perception. However one view serves no purpose but to limit you

Erimitus: I am, yet again, not understanding; can you clarify?

My concern isn't with the way I personally look or smell.

My concern is with how lazy people have become where they no longer listen and just stamp answers they commonly have to stamp.

"Sir! Jump out of the way! A semi is coming up fast behind you!"

"No, no, sorry I have all of the vacuum cleaners that I need already and am quite content with them."

*sPlAt*

Pretty much this.

If I were to judge everyone by appearance and just reply to every ugly person I saw with "No, sorry, I can't help you pop those puss sacks on your face!" there would have been a few times during my life where I would have lost my house keys or wallet permanently.

"Open the register!! Now!! And keep those hands where I can see them!!"

"I'll have to ask my manager if we can set out a donation jar for your basketball team."

*bLaM!!*

Unfortunately and as we've seen that herd can often times easily be brainwashed with trivial criteria to discriminate others for....

...anywhere from "Smokers stay away" to "All non blue-eyed, blonde-haired, Caucasians file into the gas chamber."

That's Law of Attraction to it's extreme but if that were 100% fact there would be less to worry about.

Law of Attraction = Dreams become reality.

Not true, I have proof, I don't have several mil in my bank account right now or engaged to a house load of models.

Have you even attempted to do anything to make those dreams come true?

Well, as you suggested before - if what is in front of me is truly a projection of my inner beliefs, dreams, desires and expectations the natural flow of things would have introduced me to opportunity that I would've pro-actively engaged in without hesitation.

Instead I get "Sorry there, Yank. Hang on to your CV - These ain't good times. Let us outfit our own with jobs first before we start enlisting foreigners."