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rondetto On April 22, 2024




Wrexham, United Kingdom
#1New Post! Mar 19, 2024 @ 15:21:15
Pulled a gypsy bird last night. She asked me did I want to go back to hers for a good time...



She wasn't bloody kidding. I went on the dodgems, waltzers, ghost train and came home with a goldfish!
___

Sad news at the Nestle factory today when a member of staff was seriously injured when a pallet of chocolate fell more than 50 feet and crushed him underneath...



He tried in vain to attract attention but every time he shouted "The milky bars are on me" everyone cheered.
___

A man goes into a bar with his small pet newt called Tiny. “A pint for me and a half for Tiny, please,” he says to the landlord.

The landlord asks, “Why do you name him Tiny?”

The man replies, “Because he’s my newt.”
___

“Poor old fool,” thought the well-dressed gentleman as he watched an old man fish in a puddle outside a pub. So he invited the old man inside for a drink.

As they sipped their whiskeys, the gentleman thought he’d humour the old man and asked, “So how many have you caught today?”

The old man replied, “You’re the eighth.”
___

Two snakes are walking down the street. "Oh man, I have to ask you something," the little one said.



"What is it?"



"Are we dangerous? You know, venomous?"



The other one said, "Of course we are, why?"



"Because I just bit myself!"

___
Darkman666 On about 19 hours ago




Saint Louis, Missouri
#2New Post! Mar 19, 2024 @ 19:26:04
@rondetto Said

Pulled a gypsy bird last night. She asked me did I want to go back to hers for a good time...



She wasn't bloody kidding. I went on the dodgems, waltzers, ghost train and came home with a goldfish!
___

Sad news at the Nestle factory today when a member of staff was seriously injured when a pallet of chocolate fell more than 50 feet and crushed him underneath...



He tried in vain to attract attention but every time he shouted "The milky bars are on me" everyone cheered.
___

A man goes into a bar with his small pet newt called Tiny. “A pint for me and a half for Tiny, please,” he says to the landlord.

The landlord asks, “Why do you name him Tiny?”

The man replies, “Because he’s my newt.”
___

“Poor old fool,” thought the well-dressed gentleman as he watched an old man fish in a puddle outside a pub. So he invited the old man inside for a drink.

As they sipped their whiskeys, the gentleman thought he’d humour the old man and asked, “So how many have you caught today?”

The old man replied, “You’re the eighth.”
___

Two snakes are walking down the street. "Oh man, I have to ask you something," the little one said.



"What is it?"



"Are we dangerous? You know, venomous?"



The other one said, "Of course we are, why?"



"Because I just bit myself!"

___


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