 TheParisWife
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Alanta, Georgia
Joined: Nov 2014 |
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IndieMonet727
|  Everyone is getting so old
November 23, 2014 @ 04:52:13 am| 0 |  |
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| I am at that point in my life, where it's the critical moment where you really start to focus in on this 'Adulthood' thing.
I feel like, though I am making progress within my life, it's slow going. I thought I would be in the north by now, in my own apartment, living my own life the way I want to live it.
That hasn't happened.
And I'm not bummed about it. It's just, compared to everyone around me, I'm pretty much the same girl from my freshman year in college. (The first time around)
I reconnected with a friend I've known since I was in Highschool, on FB. Back then, he kind've reminded me of a Beatle. Back when they were really young and fresh faced. Lots of energy, had lots to say, had a VERY English accent, always talking about music, always talking about an Al Pacino movie, never was pervy, but had this kind've, 60's coolness to him.
I see him today....and he looks like someone's dad.
He has cut....his hair.
REPEAT.
CUT his hair.
He's even wearing Khakis. o.O
Now, I know I'm not that same girl stomping around in Harley boots and too much eye liner, but I still feel like there's a sliver of the girl I used to be, inside me. That even though I have grown up, and I'm paying bills, and I'm doing this and doing that, I am still that 17 year old girl who just wants to travel for a year and half and make new experiences. Everyone else seem to have morphed in to totally different people. They are soooo focused in on their careers (I am too, but not that damn much)Or their relationships.
Around me, everyone seems to be having babies.
Everyone seems to be getting married.
Or getting girlfriends.
Even the ones, that couldn't stake their LIFE on getting a girl to even say Hi.
I'm 24.
It's 2014.
I'm still in this city.
Still living with my mom.
Still going to U of H (but studying something entirely different from my previous degree)
I'm still mommy #2
I haven't had a single boyfriend all year. (Which is new, but I'm actually liking it)
It just feels weird to be the only one standing still at the moment, when I wasn't always....like...this.
I hate talking to old friends or family members, because they always ask if I had a job (Which, seriously? That's next to impossible at the moment) Or if I'm dating someone. None of that is happening. None of that is GOING to happen, for a looooong time.
When is this going to end. 4 years?
I don't think so.
3 comments | Reply |
IndieMonet727
| I think theres a pattern! I think life is telling me to follow it!
April 05, 2014 @ 11:09:09 pm| 0 | |
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| I think life is telling me to date only facially specific men!
It seems like I only have a good time/have things in common with, are those guys. And they really like me too! Its just hard for me to be....well...sexually attracted to them. But romantically, I'm all theirs!
I went out on a date with a guy from OKCupid last night. First time I have ever been out with a guy that I have met online that I did NOT message/text/phone for over a month. It was more like, 3 days worth of messaging on OKCupid. Big mistake. But he seemed none serial killer-ish, so I gave him a chance.
He was nice enough. But really didn't have anything in common, and he seemed to fail at conversing. I felt like somehow I had been given the job of keeping up the chitchat, and I had to keep it going, at all costs. And he wasn't making it easy for me. Short, monosyllable answers, that never really answered my questions, so therefor, I really didn't have any clue about who this person was. By the mid point of the date, I just wanted to slam my forehead repeatedly against the table, it was so painful.
I noticed....that certain men that look a certain way.....generally are....as dull as a box of rusty, used, pissed on nails.
Its like they have no LIFE inside of them.
The man I was out with last night, is what our media infused society would call attractive. Six pack, bulging biceps, great smile, good hair, dressed well, he even SMELLED good. Not what I usually go out with!
And yet, all that fancy packaging....for nothing.
I have begun to reflect, and have come to the conclusion that the guys I was the most happiest with, a lot of people wouldn't give a second glance to. They had captured my heart in their unique individual ways, and THATS what I should be looking for. Yes, they may not necessarily had captured my LOINS, but.... whats more enriching, hot sweaty sex, or hours of laughing and verbal stimulation with someone who really does get me, and I get them, and feel the most myself with?
I guess looks really DO matter.6 comments | Reply |
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