excess weight..

hey, my best friend is overweight, but i'm not, and i probably never will be... any advice on how to treat him would be appreciated. do's, don'ts, .... just anything really.

Just treat him normally like any other person...

Wow that is a truly idiotic question. What do you mean, how do you treat him? Man, I am glad I am not your friend. How can you possibly think that what a person looks like can in any way be attributed to what kind of person they are? And that all that matters in a friendship? I don't give a monkey's uncle what anyone looks like. I associate with people who are genuine, who treat themselves and those around them with respect. Who makes me feel good about being me. Maybe you need to revise what friendship means to you. At the very least I hope your "friend" cops on and finds himself some decent people to hang with, who don't treat him any differently because he's overweight!

I am overweight. It sucks!

*ahem* see the thing is, i heard a lady saying that she felt overweight and she hated it when people said, "but you have such a pretty face!" when i think about it, i can see why she hates this, but i'm concerned that i'll lose my head for a moment and say something similar....

but yeah, you guys are right about some of what you said. i guess it's better to figure it out for myself.

sometimes, what a person looks like does mean that they will be treated a certain way. i can't help what other people do. i didn't mean that it makes someone into anything other than the unique person that they are.

I have a friend who's overweight and nobody really treats him differently because of it... at least not in a bad way. Other guys are afraid to mess with him, and the ladies love him.

You are so right Eye, sometimes people DO get treated differently on account of how they look. By only by arses. I still don't quite understand what your problem is. You say he is your best friend, so why does what he looks like matter to you? Is his health in jeopardy? Seriously endangered? Then what exactly is the problem? It seems to me you might be worried about what people are thinking of you hanging around with an overweight fella. You made you point completely when you ever-so subtlely made sure than noone reading your post could imagine you as *shock horror* FAT! I said it before, I'll say it again, I really hope your "friend" cops on and moves on!

Jones, i'll admit, your posts make me stop and question what i might be doing wrong. but i think you might be more sucessful in helping people to reform by being slightly less insulting.

i think you're making up things that could be wrong with me so that you will feel better about yourself. i do that too. but i'm not worried about what people will think! i am very proud of all my friends. i'm sure you are too, i'm sure you know that when you have a real friend, you just want to do anything you can not to hurt them.

(although i realize i'm probably doing it the wrong way). i think the right way, in light of my post, is to learn to love him better in the exact same way as i'd learn to love anyone else.

thanks for the help everyone.

With absolutely no sarcasm or malice intended, I am really glad you have come to that conclusion. I just couldn't see what your point was in your original post. In my world, I do not ever judge my friends based on their weight, skin colour, hair style, choice of clothing or anything else as superficial. Maybe that's just who I am. I am very proud to be me. I know exactly who and what I am. If this weight 'issue' with your friend is a new thing (as in he has suddenly put on weight), it may be because of an emotional/stressful situation that has come about. Give him support if that't the case. Let him know how much he means to you, and just be there for him. That's the best thing you can do. Maybe this is what you mean by asking how to treat him??

i was looking for advice pertaining to anything related to the topic, so yes, that was exactly what i was looking for. thankyou, thanks for being kind and understanding...

~peace~

i was overweight for a number of years (15 stone when i was 13) but i have managed to get down to a nice musclely 11 stone.

being overwieght were the worst days of my life. i was constantly depressed. i feel for anyone that is overweight

i've heard it's really bad. which is why i had wanted to proceed with caution.

i'm glad it's not as bad for you anymore.

i dont think it should matter what people look like, its their personality that counts. ive got a friend thats overwieght and as we are at the tender age of 15 she feels everyone judges her by the way she looks, but she is funny, flamboyant and a breath of freash air when your upset or down. she makes me laugh even just by saying chips! long story; we got bored one lunchtime.
however i also know a thin girl who is practically anorexic and she is such a b****, she is a racist, homophobic and generally creul to everyone, including me and lyndsey( my friend who is overwieght). i know who i would choose to talk to!!

emma x

some people are just mean, no matter how they look..