Why do good girls like bad guys ?

We are reading more and more these days in forums and agony-aunt columns about the number of girls and women that are abused by their bad-boy partners. This syndrome carries on right until after they are married and they finish up getting abused and even battered by these cowardly thugs.

"Bad enough" you might say but it is ten times worse when these abused females keep going back for more time and time again.

It seems that many females even enjoy being beaten and verbally and physically abused in the name of love.

What's the matter with these people ?

Why can't they just get out of an abusive relationship and go and try to find someone that will treat them right for a change.

Maybe part of the female psyche is the desire to be masochistic ?

C'mon girls, what do you see in those bad guys and why are you not so attracted to the good guys any more ?

I suppose it's the element of danger or maybe masculinity that attracts a majority of women...

i think they fall in love(or what they think is love)and then they cant get out of it they believe that no one else will have them etc basically theyre just bullied buy theyre partner and scared to get out of it

have you watched corrie recentally

And yet they make posters saying "BOYS are stupid, throw rocks at them!"...

I agree that there must be an element of security in a guy that's ruthless and strong, but when he starts treating you like (...) you should realize he's not the best protection you can get. Why come back for more unless you've got a couple of screws loose?

they have this topic on the homepage of msn. i just read it. it says something about a fixerupper and the danger...or something like that. but danger? comeon!

C'mon girls, what do you see in those bad guys and why are you not so attracted to the good guys any more ?

The attraction to the bad boys is usually because they are ELUSIVE and challenging; not necessarily abusive. We may hear women wish for a nice guy, but they are seldom attracted to them . For a large percentage of females, nice=boring. Every nice guy I know has been taken advantage of, while the bad boys always maintain the upper hand

i know i want guys i cant get. i guess its just the chalenge, and the want to have what you dont got.

I don't know why women do that. I get bored with both of them. Thank god for plastic appendiges!!!!

Thank god for plastic appendiges!!!!

don't forget rechargeable batteries

None of that for me...Ugh!

I think that for the women, the men they first meet often seems great, and treat them ok. They do seem stronge and powerfull, but not always in a threatening way. Being attracted to this strength goes back to caveman days. They then go on to develop feelings for this person. The blokes true colours then start to show and because the woman has already developed feelings for the man, she wants to believe that it is just a once off, or that she can change him.

After a while the womans self esteem is knocked so much, and she is so manipulated by this man, that she starts to blame herself. She believes that if she can stop doing things wrong then he will go back to the man she met.

When your self esteem is so low you can easily believe that you will never do any better, or that no-one will have you, so you keep going back as you believe that having him is better than having no-one. Women are often scared to leave for fear of what the man may do if she did.

Women can't always just go and tell people what is happening to them, they can feel very ashamed, and like they are in the wrong. Especially if the man always acts perfectly infront of other people. In other cases the man has forced his partner to lose all contact with people they know, so they don't have people to turn to.

Some women, who as children were brought up in a home where the father was abusive towards the mother, see it as normal in a way. This is all they have ever known.

It can be so hard for women to get out, and when they do the mentel scars can take a life time to heal. No-body starts out in life looking to be trated like s***. But sometimes people get caught in a vicious cycle of abuse, that is very hard to brake.

I am obviously not an expert in this feild, but these are my veiws on the subject. In my area they are now starting to target the men more when it comes to advertising help for domestic abuse/violence. It has been common place for years to see helpline adverts in womens toilets. They have now started putting ones in mens loos, with messages such as: You'll be found out etc, and also ones encouraging men to come forward if they know any of their friends are doing it.

I think these girls have no self-respect and feel like they can't be strong in a relationship. And not all good girls like bad boys. Only the ones who don't know their own strength.

It does go back to 'caveman' days, more or less.

Maybe I could say that good guys like bad girls. Oh why oh why... and I was about to finish that off with a nursery rhyme.

So Catatonic...

Are the girls that like bad boys really bad themselves but are able to hide it better ?

As a blokey bloke I think that man's greatest destructive power is his own testosterone.

As someone said earlier: "It goes back to the cave-man days" when the man was supposed to be the rough and tough hunter-type and the woman was supposed to be the baby-maker and sex-deliverer.

Are we saying that THAT is all men are made of and that men cannot be in touch with their feminine side without being gay ?

I have read many a letter from females to agony aunts, ( I find letters from wimmin very gripping), and about three out of ten about relationships and about guys seem to asking where all the good guys are out there as..."The one I have is a bastard, an abuser and a womaniser"....and yet they always seem to go back to that type thinking they can change them and then they stop looking for the sensitive and decent guys.

There is dozens of us, maybe more, out there so why don't you gals just keep looking instead of reacting to the cool hairdoo and the cool patter and suffering for it later on ?