Mental Health Issues

Ugh... I am sick and tired of this... I am trying to get myself back to Mississippi (currently in Arkansas) for mental health reasons. The house I was staying at when I first came up here was tiresome because I dealt with three siblings who I swear didn't even want me around unless they were getting something out of it at the moment and were always insulting me in some way due to my sexuality and religion, plus the man of the house, my ex-step-mom's husband, who constantly belittled my faith and tried to act like he understands me when he gets nothing about what I think about. Next house I'm staying at is with my dad and his old-prisonmate-now-housemate. My issue with them is that they both constantly smoke pot, constantly getting it whenever they have money, even though bills weren't getting paid. Because of that, we lost the electricity and ended up having to leave to go to my dad's friend's apartment (only 1 bedroom, so now we're cramped there). My dad lied to me to keep me from hitchhiking to Mississippi, which I am trying to do because I am sick and tired of the mental abuse I've been putting up with. I can't talk to them about it because I'm basically paying them with my silence and being nothing more than a burden. I try to make my own decisions and they become jerks to me even though they constantly tell me to grow up and all. I've been trying to get a job, but have yet to get called back for any job yet. That is why I am trying to get back home to Mississippi. Plus, getting home will help my physical condition because of my IBS (Irritable Bowel Syndrome) which flares up from stress, which I have been under constantly. I'm worried I'm practically ODing on Anti-Diahreal meds considering how much of it I've taken trying to keep my diahrrea under control. And I'm sick and tired of putting up with everything. I have been close to taking my switchblade and pluging it into my heart, but I don't only because I'm afraid of leaving everything and the pain from it. I would have a place in Mississippi if it wasn't for my best friend's mom not allowing me to stay at their house and I don't know if my God-mother would put up with me at her house since she's also trying to find a job and I don't know her living arangements at all. I just wish for once something could go my way before my brain explodes from the pain that has slowly been building up in my head.

I'm so sorry that you're under so much stress. It sounds really tough for you. Don't give up hope in getting a job because you'll find something. At least with that, you'll be away from your dad and his friend a lot more. I really do hope you can find a room for rent or get back to Mississippi very soon. I'll pray that things get better for you. There's always someone here who will listen if you feel alone. Just reach out like you've done here. Best wishes.

I hope so. I really don't like being around them at times and really need the money as it is. I wish I knew someone in real life to talk to... however, the closest person I could talk to is an hour away sadly, and I can't just tell him to come down for a talk.

Very best of luck in getting out of the situation you are in with the belittling, and with your IBS also. I've been there having had IBS myself. It's sucks. And as you mention, it is stressful to be around those that are negative. I know with age I've come to find it's important for my sanity to be around those that make me feel good about my self and when possible avoid those that don't.

Wanted to mention tips about dealing with IBS-D. You might try avoiding wheat, and all milk items for awhile. Those two tend to be the largest digestive disruptors. In case you do not know, wheat in particular even has a name for the gut problems it can cause, called celiac. An undiagnosed celiac often goes insane. Two supplements that helped me tremendously also are fish oil and vitamin D3. Both have anti inflammatory properties to them.

A couple articles that can help on how to properly take fish oil and D3.

https://heartscanblog.blogspot.com/2010/01/getting-vitamin-d-right.html

https://heartscanblog.blogspot.com/2008/12/getting-your-dose-of-fish-oil-right.html

Good luck!

sorry, but i can't help you.