(1)-Q: Did you hear about the new blonde paint?
A: It's not real bright, but it's cheap, and spreads easy.
(2)-"The woman that deliberates is lost."--Joseph Addison
(3)-Q: What is the difference between a whore, a nympho, and a blonde?
A: The whore says,"Aren't you done yet?". The nympho says,"Are you done ALREADY?". And the blonde says,"Beige, I think I'll paint the ceiling beige..."
(4)-Q: How are tornadoes and marriage alike?
A: They both begin with a lot of blowing and sucking, and in the end you lose your house.
(5)-Last night the local peeping Tom knocked on my mother-in- laws' door, and asked her to shut her blinds.
(6)-"My wife not only kept her lovely figure, she's added so much to it."--Unknown
(7)-"Roseanne Barr is a bowling ball looking for an alley."
--Mr. Blackwell
(8)-My wife's mother is the model mother-in-law.
*There is no joke in the entire world which is not suitable for her.
(9)-Q: What does a vampire and a mean mother-in-law have in common?
A: Other than fangs, nasty temperaments, an overbite and wanting to suck out all your life's blood, absolutely nothing.
(10)-Q: How many mean mother-in-laws does it take to free a beached whale?
A: Only one. Mother-in-laws are known to have very strong, long tongues.
(11)-"When it comes to acting, Joan Rivers has the range of a wart."
--Stewart Klein
(12)-WOMAN: The most efficient money reducing agent known to mankind.
(13)-A husband is looking for his old hoe and asks his wife, Have you seen our old hoe?"
Mother-in-law replies,"Even if I'm a hoe, I 'm not old yet."
(14)-A patient says,"Doctor, last night I was having dinner with my mother-in-law, and I wanted to say,"Could you please pass the butter?". "But instead I said,"You silly cow, you have ruined my life."
Oct 26, 2005 @ 04:14:48
