A few more

@rondetto Said

Mick got a job as a bus driver and on his first morning he just sat
at the depot waiting. The bus inspector came over to see what the
problem was. Mick said; " l'm waiting for the conductor! " The inspector
informed him that all the buses were now one man buses. So Mick drives
off in the double decker bus. Tweny minutes later there is a call to the depot.
One of your buses has been involved in a road traffic accident. The inspector
goes down to the crash and there is Mick and the wrecked bus. " Jesus Mick! "
asked the inspector. " How did this happen! " Mick shrugged his shoulders.
" To be truthful l don't know. l was upstairs collecting the fares at the time!!..

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A guy walked into a pub and noticed a bulls head mounted on a shield in the corner.
"That's an impressive thing", he said to the landlord.
"Yes, but it killed my dad"
"Was your dad a bull fighter?"
"No. He was playing cards in that corner one night and it fell off and hit him on the head"

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I have a pet cow. Every morning I take it for a walk through the vineyard. That's right.
I herd it through the grapevine.

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I've just finished a book about a detective who solves crimes purely by chance.
It was called Sheerluck Holmes.........

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