it's been five months since we talked. so much time has passed. so may things have happened. people have come and gone in my life. and so was he. i learned to forgive. i leaned how to live without him by my side. i learned to make plans for myself. i learned how to focus on my work. after all these time that he wasn't there, i learned to appreciate other things. i learned from the people around me. from myself. from my own experiences. i learned to trust myslef once more. i learned that one day i could love once again. i learned that i could be happy even without him. i learned that life goes on. i learned... or so i thought.
how could one single text message change all of that? how could i forget all that i learned? how could i forget that once, this man have caused alot of damage into my life. into my whole being? how could just one message made me forget all those?
now i'm back. back to where i found myself a few months back.
distraught...
hurtin....
unable to trust...
feelin useless...
lost....
why?
why did he come back? why does he have to do this?
why....
It's not forgetting what you've learned. it is simply your emotions working against you. Be strong and make sure you make a choice you can respect and live with.
Those same feelings are still there they are just buried beneath the hope of him chaning and things being different this time. Hang in there and don't let anyone push you in a direction that you can not freely walk eyes open into.
why?
July 07, 2006 @ 04:18:21 pm
