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PsychoLife
Dreams (Censored)
August 17, 2009 @ 11:05:15 pm

Dreams


Phase I: The Meeting

It had been a long time since they first started talking. What started as a simple hello over the emptiness of cyberspace was becoming something closer than either of them could really gauge. It was more than she wanted, but not as much as he wanted. It was hard to believe that they knew each other for less than a year. When they were talking they seemed so at ease with each other that you would have thought that they were close friends for most of their lives. When she first made her presence known to him, it was at a whim. To her, it was just another in a long line of friends that would leave her before long. To him it was an unlikely friendship that he didn?t feel adequate to be part of. To him it felt like he would never be enough for her. To her it felt as though she would never be able to interest him. They were both wrong. Here it was less than a year since that first hello, and they are finally able to look into each others eyes. He had flown half way around the world for this one chance and here he was, sitting in the plane trying to decide whether or not to go through with it. Doubts raced through his mind like panicked rats.
?What if she doesn?t like the real me?? ?What if I disgust her?? ?What if I offend her?? ?What if I?m not what she pictured?? These were all he could think of until he firmly shut them out. He reassured himself the same way he had during the long hours of the trip. ?What do you say we let the lady decide, shall we?? It was a good decision and he was proud of it. He knew that she had her own doubts about herself, and that it was no fairer of her to think less of herself than it was for him to think less of himself on her behalf. He also knew that he couldn?t begin to see how wonderful she was if he was so consumed by self-doubt that he spent less than one-hundred percent of his attention on her.
Here it was, the door of the terminal. He had told her to be at gate fourteen, and now he was there. So was she. Their eyes met. She looked away, and he was hurt. But he was only hurt for a moment. He realized that she looked away due to embarrassment, not from disgust. It bolstered him enough to get him walking. He was standing in front of her when she started to look back up. She hadn?t realized that he had come the small distance between them, so a small gasp of surprise escaped her lips. She also took a small step back before he had her in his arms. It was not a passionate embrace, but rather the embrace of a man that finally held the one thing he had been looking towards for so long. It was the embrace of a man that had finally been able to show the great relief that rests in the soul of all those that are saved from an outside influence. It was an embrace of the greatest sadness and exultation. It was an embrace of life and love. It was the embrace of friends.




Phase II: The Day

They sat across from each other in a small diner. They were sipping their drinks. What they were drinking seemed rather similar, but only from a distance. She sipped a martini, he sipped water. He rather liked water from this side of the world. They had had lunch in order to catch up, and to catch their breath. Their meeting had left both of them feeling a bit out of sorts. More so than either one would even admit to themselves, let alone to each other. He had eaten quite a bit, or so it seemed to him for she had barely touched her food. She said that she was not that hungry, but he knew the truth. She had spent so much time avoiding food that it was as bad for her as starvation was to him. He knew better than to say anything about it, but that didn?t help the idea that he should help her. Maybe someday she would let him, but today was not that day.
They spent the rest of the day seeing the sights that were in this strange new country. All were old to her, but brand new to him. He drank them in as much for their own value, as for the lovely guide that he had. And she was lovely; there was no doubt about it. It was not the physical beauty, even though that that was surely present. It was something much deeper than that. A hint of pain with a touch of desire maybe. It was an elusive feeling that made him feel like he had to hold her. But he could not trust himself to do it for the comforting factors as much as for the sensual ones that kept creeping into his mind. He knew that she knew about those thoughts. He could tell by the way she would steal little sideways glances at him then look forward again blushing. Then again, she was smiling a these times to. She seemed to be constantly smiling and he found that he was too. It was like he was a goofy teenager again. Smiling because he didn?t know if he was embarrassed, horny or something completely different. That was why he tried to soak in as much as the atmosphere as he could. He had to learn about this beautiful woman that was beside him. That was when it struck him; she was not to be found in the little diners and the streets of this city or this country. The only way he was going to learn about this lady was to look into her eyes and give himself to her. But that was only going to work if she did the same thing. He knew she had been hurt many times in the past and he had no right to ask her to risk it again, but he was going to.
He stopped her mid-sentence to ask of her thoughts on the subject. It seemed that he had avoided this question since that first embrace. It would be avoided no more. He looked deep into her eyes and asked if she would let him give himself to her, as he asked that she do the same. Suddenly her eyes filled with tears and he was wondering if he had just lost his friend. She reassured him that that was not the case, but that she had been thinking along the same lines. She just didn?t know how to broach the subject without seeming too much like an over-eager little girl. He tried to tell her that he was willing to do anything she wanted to make her feel completely comfortable with him, but she just shook her head saying that he didn?t know what he was asking. He most certainly did know what he was offering and to prove it he did the one thing that would show just how much he was willing to give her.
He kissed her.
It wasn?t a kiss to write movies about, but it was definitely one that they would both remember for the rest of their lives. It was the one thing that both had wanted, but neither had the courage to ask for. It was pure bliss. In that moment, they were both at complete ease with each other and the doors that had been locked to each other were suddenly thrown wide open. These doors would never close again, let alone lock. They would now know each other as well, if not better, as they knew themselves. Their eyes were closed during the kiss, but they saw each other better now than they had any time previous. It was a moment that would define life for them both.


Phase III: The Night

[EDITED FOR CONTENT] (if you want to know, then send a PM and I will send you the omitted section)


Phase IV: The Next Day


When he awoke a little after noon, he was alone in bed. He looked around and tried to figure out if last night was just a dream or if it in fact had happened. With that first deep breath he confirmed that it was true, because there was only one thing that had that smell and that was a long night of sex. After he got up, retrieved his clothes, relieved himself and got his bearing around the house, he found her in the kitchen sipping coffee. She was dressed in a shear robe that accented her beautiful body in a way that caused a stirring in him. He had to turn and look into the refrigerator in order to banish such thoughts for the time being. He didn?t know if she had regrets about last night, but even if she didn?t he was sure that they both needed a bit more rest before they could get back into the type of shape that would be required for that kind of exertion. At least he would need to find something to drink and maybe a muffin. When he had found a bottle of water, a bagel, as well as self-control he turned around to face her. She looked up at him and smiled. That smile banished any doubts he had and confirmed his love for her. He walked over and placed a hand on her shoulder, which she covered with her hand and laid her head on top of both. He leaned down and gave her a good morning kiss. She returned it and offered to make him breakfast. As she started to get up, he gently pushed her back down and told her that he was quite capable of cooking not only his breakfast, but hers as well. All she had to do was point out where she kept the pans and the flour. Even she had to admit that she was a bit hungry after the night they had just shared. When breakfast was on the table, they began a bit of small talk that circled around one topic: his departure. When she couldn?t bear it any longer, she told him how much it would hurt when he left. As she said it her eyes welled up with tears but she tried to cover them to no avail. He smiled a slightly mischievous smile and took her by the hand. He took her to where his luggage was, opened his one suitcase, and told her to look at the little envelope that was sticking out of the pocket in the top. She did this, but she could tell that it was a plane ticket from the look of the envelope. She started to put it back in the pocket unopened saying that she didn?t want to be reminded of the time when he would leave her. He kept insisting until she finally opened the small flap that held the envelope closed. What she saw made her gasp as she dropped the envelope on the floor. She looked into his eyes for confirmation, and found it there. What she had seen in the envelope was not just his return ticket, but her ticket as well. It was a round trip ticket with an open return date. She leapt into his arms and kissed him. It was not the kiss of impending sexual activity; it was the kiss of someone that that has been given the greatest gift that they had dared never to ask for. But he had promised long ago that if he could allow her to leave her current life, he would. Now he was fulfilling that one promise that she had always prayed for, but never thought would ever happen. She looked at the ticket again, but noticed that it was not to his home airport. When she asked about it, he said that there was no real need to go straight home, and that he remembered her saying that she wanted to see much of his country. Now she would have her chance. Dreams do come true, after all.

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