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"Pleasure of love lasts but a moment, Pain of love lasts a lifetime."
On August 04, 2010 rashell16


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City of the Dead, Palau
Joined: Jun 2005

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Age: 28
Gender: F
Location: City of the Dead
Palau (general)
Palau
Posts: 336
PLS: ? 62.25
Joined:: Jun 17, 2005
Reputation: 2

 
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Ras' journal
uh...life
[h6]Well, the week hasn't been going so well. Guys teasing me, teachers being b****es and feeling so isolated from friends. People say it's just a phase but i'm not so sure. i hope it is. Not to mention the 10-20 pound weight gain in about say 6 months. Things are sliding down. It all went from negative 40 to posative 3 then 80 and now 50-60. its so bumpy, no wonder people grab the knife when they bounce off. Suicide 5 times and the pills never worked.i just hope everything comes out good and ok....[/h6]

Public entry my new life
August 15, 2009 @ 12:05:23 pm
0
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Public entry [No Topic]
May 20, 2006 @ 05:28:54 pm
a poem of heartbreak

lonely days and
restless nights
have remained
the product of a thousand
painful tears.
with each new tear
that escapes an already
bloodshot eye,
another corner
of my heart
is laid to ruin,
left in shambles.
the pure torment
i have endured
has become
the splinter
in my mind.
devoid of sleep,
lack of appetite.
breathing has been
my only
train of thought.

**Home** </dp/44>

i know i shouldn't be feeling this
but this wrong just feels too right
i'm caught between you and my reason again
and my reason keeps changing its mind

so what do i do being stuck here?
caught in the middle of you?
you just make me too happy to let go of it
but i know that pain will come through

please stop being so kind to me
please stop being so real
please stop treating me like i might be worth it
i know that's not how you feel

and then sometimes my brain tells me you love me
and then sometimes i start loosing my mind

i know it's dumb to keep on trying
you don't love me and if you did
you couldn't do anything about it
so you'll never be with me

but you keep coming over and over
and i know its time i let go
it just would be alot more easy
if you'd stop feeling so much like my home

"Love" </dp/9214>

Why Is It
Whenever It Seems Within Grasp
It Slips Away
We Live Our Lives Searching
Hoping
Waiting For That One Person
Someone To Confide In
Someone Who Truly Cares
And Then
By Mere Chance
You Meet
Your True Love
The Object Of Your Affection
Your One And Only
But She Isn't Yours To Have
My Point Is This
Love Is Rare
Take Hold Of What You Have
Even If It's Only A Midnight Call
Or Some Magic Chance Weekend
Show Her Friendship
Show Her Truth
Love In Every Form
Find Joy In Her Eyes
Warmth In Her Heart
And Sorrow In Her Tears
For Though You May Never Be
If You Truly Love Her
She Will Now And Always Wonder

What If ?



The Definition of Love....
Love is not a necessity, but it is life’s greatest gift and luxury.
Love is caring, kind, and patient.
Love does not expect anything but love in return.
Love knows when to put pride to the side,
Because the greatest thing one can be proud of
Is a love that is shared.

Love is or should be unconditional.
Love is giving and selfless.
Love is therefore unselfish.
Love is not arrogant, or does not insist in its own way,
It is a celebration of what is right.
True love never ends.

For the unperfected will pass upon
The coming of that which is perfect,
And Perfect love never ends.

Love is undying devotion (yes that too).
Love is not resentful and does not rejoice in wrong, but celebrates the right

Love is the desire to be intimate...physically and emotionally.
Love endures all, hopes all, bears all.
Love is believing, sharing, dreaming.
Love is Honesty.
Love is friendship, companionship, and more.

Love is completion.
Forgiving.
Understanding and inspiring.

Love is the attainment of life's greatest inspiration.
Love is supporting, but not overbearing.
Love is the free and complete expression of oneself to/for another.

Love is being open to an other's expression...

True friends, companion, lover, and mother (or father).

Love is faithful and loyal.

Love is the one thing in life (true love is), that man (as a whole race) longs for and strives for, and in many cases, more than anything else it can be the hardest to find.
Love can be strong, yet so fragile.
There are those out there who have not been lucky enough to find it...some never will. (Not all, but some)
In addition, what one would call true love...love in its best, purest, truest sense is even rarer and harder to find.

Not that no one ever does;
Many probably do.
It is still the hardest thing that mankind strives to obtain.

The dream of finding and marrying for true love exists and
Concludes by everything falling into place.

The way i felt at one time...
***the way her tears... make me want to change the world... so that it doesn't hurt her any more... yet regardless if i love her... hate her... wish she would die... or know that i would die with out her... it matters not. Because for once in my life... whatever she was to the world... she now becomes everything to me... and when i look in to her eyes... traveling... to the depths of her soul... and i say a million things... with out a trace of a sound... i know that my own life is inevitable... consumed with in the rhythmic beatings of her vary heart... i love her for a million reasons... no paper would do it justice, it is a thing not of the mind.....but of the heart***



How much you really mean to me When you walked in my life You brightened my tears You gave me a whole new Outlook upon tons of things. Not knowing the effect You have on me you have to see How much you really mean to me I didn't realize it at first But without you I have nothing. You don't see how much you really mean to me I can't imagine you, Not here in my life, Not there by my side guiding me And showing me what it means to be loved. You don't see how much you really mean to me When you're around there's not a problem in the world, But when you're not here in my arms everything imaginable Is wrong in my life. You don't see how much you really mean to me I'm scared to love you, But I'm petrified To lose you! You have to see you really mean so much to me The way you treat me The way you act And just everything about you is perfect! You really mean so much to me You complete me and You have guided me. You taught me many things. I don't know how to repay You but, all I know is that You are everything to me and without you I won't make it in life. What I am trying to tell you, Is that I love you, you mean so much to me And I will always be there for you and I'll be waiting for you to understand how I feel towards you and that someday maybe you will feel the same way for me

What you mean to me:
What you mean to me When i sleep at night i think of you, wondering if you think of me too. When i'm dreaming i dream of you, I dream of how good it is to be with you. I see your eyes, your lips, your cheeks. your eyes so beautiful and lips so sweet. The things I miss when I'm not with you Is the way we kiss and how we cuddle too. I hope you see what this poem means, remember this is what you mean to me.
so you wanna leave me here like this,
all alone, and only you to miss,
you've turned the tables,
and left me here,
wanting you more with every tear,
why would you do such a thing,
not only to a lover,
but also to a friend
and as your friend im here til' the end,
but you still want to abandon me like this.
so if thats the ways its gonna be,
then so be it,
but i want you to know
i never wanna hear it,
that you should have been with me all along,
so let me tell you here and now,
SCREW YOU!
you took my heart b4 it was even yours,
so dont knock on my door,
cuz i wont be there,
keep ruining my life,
and i'll slit your throwt with a knife!
________________________________________________________________________
note:not all of these are mine
0
3 comments | Quote | Reply

Public entry [No Topic]
May 20, 2006 @ 05:28:32 pm
a poem of heartbreak

lonely days and
restless nights
have remained
the product of a thousand
painful tears.
with each new tear
that escapes an already
bloodshot eye,
another corner
of my heart
is laid to ruin,
left in shambles.
the pure torment
i have endured
has become
the splinter
in my mind.
devoid of sleep,
lack of appetite.
breathing has been
my only
train of thought.

**Home** </dp/44>

i know i shouldn't be feeling this
but this wrong just feels too right
i'm caught between you and my reason again
and my reason keeps changing its mind

so what do i do being stuck here?
caught in the middle of you?
you just make me too happy to let go of it
but i know that pain will come through

please stop being so kind to me
please stop being so real
please stop treating me like i might be worth it
i know that's not how you feel

and then sometimes my brain tells me you love me
and then sometimes i start loosing my mind

i know it's dumb to keep on trying
you don't love me and if you did
you couldn't do anything about it
so you'll never be with me

but you keep coming over and over
and i know its time i let go
it just would be alot more easy
if you'd stop feeling so much like my home

"Love" </dp/9214>

Why Is It
Whenever It Seems Within Grasp
It Slips Away
We Live Our Lives Searching
Hoping
Waiting For That One Person
Someone To Confide In
Someone Who Truly Cares
And Then
By Mere Chance
You Meet
Your True Love
The Object Of Your Affection
Your One And Only
But She Isn't Yours To Have
My Point Is This
Love Is Rare
Take Hold Of What You Have
Even If It's Only A Midnight Call
Or Some Magic Chance Weekend
Show Her Friendship
Show Her Truth
Love In Every Form
Find Joy In Her Eyes
Warmth In Her Heart
And Sorrow In Her Tears
For Though You May Never Be
If You Truly Love Her
She Will Now And Always Wonder

What If ?



The Definition of Love....
Love is not a necessity, but it is life’s greatest gift and luxury.
Love is caring, kind, and patient.
Love does not expect anything but love in return.
Love knows when to put pride to the side,
Because the greatest thing one can be proud of
Is a love that is shared.

Love is or should be unconditional.
Love is giving and selfless.
Love is therefore unselfish.
Love is not arrogant, or does not insist in its own way,
It is a celebration of what is right.
True love never ends.

For the unperfected will pass upon
The coming of that which is perfect,
And Perfect love never ends.

Love is undying devotion (yes that too).
Love is not resentful and does not rejoice in wrong, but celebrates the right

Love is the desire to be intimate...physically and emotionally.
Love endures all, hopes all, bears all.
Love is believing, sharing, dreaming.
Love is Honesty.
Love is friendship, companionship, and more.

Love is completion.
Forgiving.
Understanding and inspiring.

Love is the attainment of life's greatest inspiration.
Love is supporting, but not overbearing.
Love is the free and complete expression of oneself to/for another.

Love is being open to an other's expression...

True friends, companion, lover, and mother (or father).

Love is faithful and loyal.

Love is the one thing in life (true love is), that man (as a whole race) longs for and strives for, and in many cases, more than anything else it can be the hardest to find.
Love can be strong, yet so fragile.
There are those out there who have not been lucky enough to find it...some never will. (Not all, but some)
In addition, what one would call true love...love in its best, purest, truest sense is even rarer and harder to find.

Not that no one ever does;
Many probably do.
It is still the hardest thing that mankind strives to obtain.

The dream of finding and marrying for true love exists and
Concludes by everything falling into place.

The way i felt at one time...
***the way her tears... make me want to change the world... so that it doesn't hurt her any more... yet regardless if i love her... hate her... wish she would die... or know that i would die with out her... it matters not. Because for once in my life... whatever she was to the world... she now becomes everything to me... and when i look in to her eyes... traveling... to the depths of her soul... and i say a million things... with out a trace of a sound... i know that my own life is inevitable... consumed with in the rhythmic beatings of her vary heart... i love her for a million reasons... no paper would do it justice, it is a thing not of the mind.....but of the heart***



How much you really mean to me When you walked in my life You brightened my tears You gave me a whole new Outlook upon tons of things. Not knowing the effect You have on me you have to see How much you really mean to me I didn't realize it at first But without you I have nothing. You don't see how much you really mean to me I can't imagine you, Not here in my life, Not there by my side guiding me And showing me what it means to be loved. You don't see how much you really mean to me When you're around there's not a problem in the world, But when you're not here in my arms everything imaginable Is wrong in my life. You don't see how much you really mean to me I'm scared to love you, But I'm petrified To lose you! You have to see you really mean so much to me The way you treat me The way you act And just everything about you is perfect! You really mean so much to me You complete me and You have guided me. You taught me many things. I don't know how to repay You but, all I know is that You are everything to me and without you I won't make it in life. What I am trying to tell you, Is that I love you, you mean so much to me And I will always be there for you and I'll be waiting for you to understand how I feel towards you and that someday maybe you will feel the same way for me

What you mean to me:
What you mean to me When i sleep at night i think of you, wondering if you think of me too. When i'm dreaming i dream of you, I dream of how good it is to be with you. I see your eyes, your lips, your cheeks. your eyes so beautiful and lips so sweet. The things I miss when I'm not with you Is the way we kiss and how we cuddle too. I hope you see what this poem means, remember this is what you mean to me.
so you wanna leave me here like this,
all alone, and only you to miss,
you've turned the tables,
and left me here,
wanting you more with every tear,
why would you do such a thing,
not only to a lover,
but also to a friend
and as your friend im here til' the end,
but you still want to abandon me like this.
so if thats the ways its gonna be,
then so be it,
but i want you to know
i never wanna hear it,
that you should have been with me all along,
so let me tell you here and now,
SCREW YOU!
you took my heart b4 it was even yours,
so dont knock on my door,
cuz i wont be there,
keep ruining my life,
and i'll slit your throwt with a knife!
0
Quote | Reply

Public entry Father's Day
June 19, 2005 @ 06:04:50 am
Hey. whats up? honestly for me, my father is not home on fatheres day....im perfectly fine with dat but its still like wierd. So now im bored outta my mind with nothing to keep me occupied but TFS. Which helps a little. i think im gonna go chat peace and god bless. Ras
0
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