 becky_pepper
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Stourbridge, United Kingdom
Joined: Aug 2007 |
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I was thinking to myself earlier, some of my closer friends on here will know about the whole upset I had while up north in Scotland and will also know how it ended.
Well I did the maths yesterday and I've worked out that a week tomorrow marks it as a YEAR since it all happened, I can happily say I've been living in Stourbridge for a year and I've never been happier. This time last year I had no social life to speak of, had the lowest form of self esteem imaginable and had no future in mind, everything had just come crashing down around me and I was just about ready to give up on just about everything.
However, thanks to the few friends I had down here, I developed in confidence, I began to go out a lot more, I met new people and I've never been more happier.
As a little thought I just thought I'd say, for those who've had something happen to them that's caused their entire life to stand still, and who feel like there's no point to anything anymore...hang in there! There's always a light at the end of the tunnel, although it's hard to see at the moment/to start with, if you hang in there, life gets so much better...after a down there's always an up, just stay smiling and talk to friends and family and keep all loved ones close to you as they're the only ones next to yourself who can truly help you pull yourself together...
Just thought I'd share that with everyone  | |
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So far I haven't met any one at work other than 1 person who lives in Stourbridge. However that person can drive, so dosn't need to get up for another coupld of hours!...me?...I'm up at 4:45am, to do a 45 min' walk to the train station, try not to fall asleep on a 15 min' train journey, walk 10 min's to work (thankfull down hill) start at 7:30am and finish at 4:30pm  Normally I wouldn't mind but I'm shattered  I made sure I had an early night but me being me...I love my sleep! Need I say more? peole at work say I'm mad for traveling all the way to Kidderminster when I live in Stourbridge...I'm beginning to understand why. Still, in times as such I'd rather be employed than unemployed! | |
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sorry but I just logged on and my super powers thread is a featured topic  first time woop woop | |
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Has anyone ever had one of those weeks? Starts off with have you ever had one of those days? and then sorta spirals out throughout the week! I'm currently having one of those weeks so far today! and it's not fun let me tell you!
Monday - if possible - has been more probably the best day of the week for me so far!?!? Why I hear you say? because I knew where I stood in matters!!!!!! 2 interviews, 1 to say yes I'm still looking for a job, thank you, bye!...2nd someone helping me to find a volunteer work place to gain experiance! and also my mom getting back from Bulgaria
YESTERDAY garrrrrrr!!!!!!! Mum has the day off and suddenly I'm the one being blamed for anything around the house that hasn't been done/hasn't been cleaned etc! Try to get in touch with a certain someone and it's like banging my head against a brick wall!
As you can see I'm a tad peeved to say the least! I just want to know where I stand in matters! And I tend to get frustrated when I try to arrange something and all I get is the silent treatment!
that and the weather's crap! It's supposed to be summer I mean come on!? Still, at least my hayfever'll give me a rest today! *she says sneezing*
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I just found something out............
I'VE LOST 3 POUND!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
and that's not the cash pound!!!!!!!!!
Current Music: arctic monkeys - I bet that you look good on the dancefloor
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I'm trying so hard to stay positive but things are just getting too much now!I've always been a negative thinker and my partner has been trying to help me stay positive and I have to admit that up untill today I was doing fine! Today though has so far pushed me to the limits.
The other day while browsing on my myspace I found that a girl I used to be really close friends with while at school had added some new photos of herself, though she looked unbelievably thin, and naturally I began to worry. The photo itself was a nice pic' though the image of her being so slim worried me,as she has had health troubles in the past. I posted her a comment complimenting the photo though pointing out I was worried about how thin she looked in it...what did I get in reply?
"im holding a f***ing camra so my mucles are stretched and tence. I'm quite offended that ppl say stuff like that to me who dont see me in the flesh."
" U knw im happy with my body and when ppl say stuff like that it upsets me. I knw i was prohaps a little abrubt eirlier but the truth is i've had modeling agencies contact me and i am not starving myself at all fare enough i did go threw a rough patch one but im healthy now and when ppl upset me about my body it makes me feel like s*** and get verry angry. Hope u understand now"
I guess I was being stupid really being worried 
not only that I had yet another rejection letter come through the post (no surprise there) though I was feeling confident about the job as I'd had a good talk with the store manager when I handed in my application form! 8 months and hardly a good job! What the hell am I doing wrong?! 
I guess I'm just a waste of space, no one seems to give a sod about how I think or feel! No one seems to want to employ me, I guess I should face up to the fact that I may have to move bakc to my original home and suffer depression about the fact I won't be seeing my partner every morning!
Why is this happening to me?!?!?!?!?!?!
Current Music: don't speak - No doubt
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| goin tempin bowling with the partner soon! Any hints on how to beat a male in his prime? | |
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Ok I'm kinda hacked off! My last entry mentioned how I didn't have long enough breaks (20 min's in total) I have found out today that I only have sunday as a day off! When I was told I'd be having Saturday off too! It's my 5th day there and I'm already getting pissed off with the managers!
I was talking to a colleague earlier, she says the main reason her last relationship didn't work out was because of the job, they constantly gave her night shifts so she didn't have time to see her partner. She was always asleep and there were constant arguments. Not only that but they have one girl doing a night shift and they've made her do the afternoon shift the very next day!!!!!!!
I do not want to have to lose my relationship because of those gits! I really have had enough! I was treated like crap yesterday by the manger when I had the day off, and she couldn't meet my eye today, she kept making snide remarks about me to the deputy manager and to the rest of the staff and shut up when I looked at her!
I've had enough of this job, I want to make people happy I really do, but when I have snide comments etc off my BOSS! and when I apologised the 5th time today she said "oh dw you gave us ample notice...."
SO WHY BE SUCH A COW TOWARD ME THEN!!!!!?????
I seriously think I'm losing it, I just don't know what to do anymore :'(
I really can't see myself going in tomorrow I really can't...I don;t know what to do...can someone please advice me with what to do? I cna't speak to my partner as he's out till midnight tonight at work, and I won't be able to talk to him seeing as I've got to go to bed at 9pm tonight if I'm to get up at 5am to catch the first bus there and then go through the day by wiping human excrement all day!
WTF do I do???????? | |
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Right, most of you will have noticed I posted a topic saying I'd started a new job!
The job is working in a residential home, a caare worker, helping people with dementia and general old age etc. So far this week I've been working from 7am till 3pm, and in that time, tea break is 5 min's and lunch is 10 min's.
Other han that time we're not allowed to sit down and rest our feet. So naturally my feet are usually aching by the end of the day. Last night I got back from work and I was in agony. I had 3 foot massages off my partner, 2 foot soakes, some deep heat rub rubbed into my feet, nothing's helped, and it's resulted in me having to take a day off today,I feel awful!
I really want this job but having a day off within the first week of starting. I know I've upset my boss, and I keep thinking I've upset my partner, even though he says I havn't! I got in touch with the local doctors and they've recommended I take pain killers and it should ease off. I know I havn't been sacked (yet) and I'll be going in tomorrow, but I'm scared I'm wussing out on everything.
I feel awful I really do, I want to make people happy and I really want this job, but I couldn't walk this morning full stop, doing my teeth was agony!
Has anyone else ever gone through something like this? were you yelled at by your boss?
Sorry for the rant but I'm feeling so down in the dumps and miserable and I have no one but all you brill' people here to talk to me. | |
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I may need some advice or not I'm not sure, everything in my life is so so messed up at the moment and I can't get anything right. I can't think straight anymore and it's driving me crazy.
I've moved house with my partner and we're now living in our own house with Pete's mate Ozzy and soon Ozzy's partner Ashliegh...we're paying rent to Ozzy's parents, it's
Current Music: daft punk - technologic
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Just a little thought
