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kpharriso On November 17, 2016
Batshit crazy :)





Boganville, Australia
#1New Post! Jan 18, 2010 @ 08:21:34
(Stolen from Facebook)

1. You know that ?stubbies? are either short shorts or small beer bottles, a ?gimp?, ?bogan? or ?geezer? is a random idiot, someone in trouble is in ?strife? and you?re liable to burst out laughing whenever you hear of Americans ?rooting? for something.

2. You know that Burger King doesn?t exist. It?s Hungry Jacks.

3. You know that snow is a memorable and freakish occurrence. Sometimes it?s even fake.

4. You know the difference between thongs and a G-string.

5. You?re familiar with Neighbours, Home and Away, Playschool, A Country Practice, Norman Gunston, Barry Humphries, Blue Heelers, Ray Martin, Bert Newton, Lisa McCune, Jon Burgess, Number 96, Molly Meldrum, Kerry O?Brien, and of course, Kerry Packer and Rupert Murdoch.


4. You know how to abbreviate every word, all of which usually end in -o: arvo, combo, garbo, kero, lezzo, metho, milko, muso, rego, servo, smoko, speedo, righto etc.

5. You know that some ppl pronounce Australia like ?Strayla? and that?s ok.

6. You know that there is a universal place called ?woop woop? located in the middle of nowhere? no matter where you actually are.

7. You know that while we call our friends ?mates?, we don?t use terms like ?sheila? and ?shrimp on the barbie?, contrary to popular belief.

8. You know that none of us actually drink Fosters beer, because it tastes like s***. But we let the world think we do. Because we can.

9. You?ve seen Gallipoli, Crocodile Dundee, Young Einstein, Muriel?s Wedding, The Castle, Beneath Clouds, Strictly Ballroom, 40,000 Horsemen, and maybe even WolfCreek.

10. It makes you happy when someone in Hollywood is actually Australian? Mel Gibson, Nicole Kidman, Russell Crowe, Cate Blanchett, Baz Luhrman, Elle MacPherson, Olivia Newton-John, Midnight Oil, ACDC, INXS, Greg Norman, Cathy Freeman, Dawn Fraser, Pat Rafter, Ian Thorpe?

11. One word: Skippy.

12. You know that Sydney 2000 was one of our proudest moments in history. We just f***ing rock.

13. You know that you are not going to die of cholera or other Third World diseases (remote Aboriginal communities are a different matter)

14. You know our country has never been conquered by a foreign nation (you don?t count 1788).

15. We know that the Metric system will always be better than anything inches, feet, pounds and fahrenheit will ever offer.

16. You drive on the left-hand side of the road.

17. If you?re a pedestrian and cars are stopped at a red light, you will fearlessly cross the street in front of them. ?Hit and runs? just aren?t cricket. Because Aussies stick together.

18. You know that New Zealanders are basically our naive country cousins, who have a weird fush-and-chups accent and, for some bizare reason, think that they invented pavlova. They are to be pitied. They have no hope of gaining the upper hand in the endless sporting rivalry between our two nations.

19. You know that you can?t eat Fantales alone? Otherwise who will you play the ?Who am I?? game with when you?re reading the wrapper?

20. You know that Sydney should be the capital, because Canberra is a hole.

21. You know that Americans think we?re all Steve Irwin clones. And crickey, they couldn?t be more wrong.

22. You know that lawyers wear wigs and gowns. And we make it look good.

23. You have some time in your life slept with Aeroguard on in the summer. Maybe even as perfume.

24. You feel obliged to spread salty black stuff that looks like congealed motor oil on bread? and actually grow to like it. You?ve also squeeze Vegemite through Vita Wheats to make little Vegemite worms.

25. You believe that democracy means the freedom to draw caricatures of good ol? Johnny Howard.

26. You have the ability to compress several words into one - ie ?g?day? and ?d?reckn??. This allows more space for profanities.

27. You?ve ever used the words - tops, ripper, sick, mad, rad, sweet - to mean good. And then you place ?bloody? in front of it when you REALLY mean it.

28. You know that the barbeque is a political arena; the person holding the tongs is always the boss and usually a man. And the women make the salad.

29. You say ?no worries? quite often, whether you realise it or not.

30. You know what fairy bread tastes like, and you can?t imagine your childhood without it.

31. You know the first verse to the national anthem, but still don?t know what ?girt? means. And you?re ok with that.

32. You?ve drank your tea/coffee/milo through a Tim Tam.

33. You know that backyard cricket is a nice way to bond with family and the rubbish bin. And the ?one bounce, one hand? rule always applies.

34. You know that we are home to the just about all of the world?s deadliest of animals. That?s why if anybody messes with us we?ll get some funnel webs on their asses.

35. You see people walking bare-foot on the sidewalk and don?t scorn?. because you?re doing it too.

36. You know that in summer a seat belt buckle becomes a pretty good branding iron.

36. You know what trop-fest is and it makes you happy.

37. Sausage rolls and meat pies. End of story.

38. You firmly believe that in the end, everything will be ok and have offered advice that included the words, ?she?ll be right, mate?.

39. You have a story that somehow involves an excessive consumption of booze? but you can?t remember.

40. You own a Bond?s chesty. In several different colours.

41. You?ve ordered a steak the size as your head and only paid $5 at your local RSL.

42. You know that Italy should never have been granted that fateful kick in the 2006 Soccer World Cup.

43. You know how to slip, slop, slap like it?s nobody?s business.

44. You?ve heard the Prime Minister dismiss anyone who disagrees with him simply as ?un-Australian?, and that?s enough to make us sit down and shut up.

45. You know that the value of a public holiday is measured in terms of alchohol. God bless the queen and her 4-day birthday.

46. You refer to someone you like as ?a total bastard?, but call someone you don?t like ?a bit of a bastard?.

47. You know there?s no lbw in backyard cricket, and over the fence is out.

48. You know Drop Bears exist. Positively.

49. You know that roo meat tastes pretty good, but not as good as barra. Or a meat pie.

50.You know Australia IS the best bloody place on earth. Bar none.

51.You show this to people because joking around is the Australian way.
Jason13 On October 22, 2010




Melbourne, Australia
#2New Post! Jan 18, 2010 @ 08:23:01
In #5 you missed Kingswood Country
kpharriso On November 17, 2016
Batshit crazy :)





Boganville, Australia
#3New Post! Jan 18, 2010 @ 08:23:52
Seeing as I have no idea what you're on about... No I didn't
Jason13 On October 22, 2010




Melbourne, Australia
#4New Post! Jan 18, 2010 @ 08:27:34
@kpharriso Said

Seeing as I have no idea what you're on about... No I didn't



If you don't know Kingswood Country, you have NO RIGHT to call yourself an Aussie!
kpharriso On November 17, 2016
Batshit crazy :)





Boganville, Australia
#5New Post! Jan 18, 2010 @ 08:30:16
@Jason13 Said

If you don't know Kingswood Country, you have NO RIGHT to call yourself an Aussie!



I'm still an Aussie, I can tick most of those things... Besides, tis just a bit of fun, mate
blackdahliaxxx On March 30, 2012

Banned



birmingham Uk, United Kingdom
#6New Post! Jan 18, 2010 @ 08:31:03
@kpharriso Said

(Stolen from Facebook)

1. You know that ?stubbies? are either short shorts or small beer bottles, a ?gimp?, ?bogan? or ?geezer? is a random idiot, someone in trouble is in ?strife? and you?re liable to burst out laughing whenever you hear of Americans ?rooting? for something.

2. You know that Burger King doesn?t exist. It?s Hungry Jacks.

3. You know that snow is a memorable and freakish occurrence. Sometimes it?s even fake.

4. You know the difference between thongs and a G-string.

5. You?re familiar with Neighbours, Home and Away, Playschool, A Country Practice, Norman Gunston, Barry Humphries, Blue Heelers, Ray Martin, Bert Newton, Lisa McCune, Jon Burgess, Number 96, Molly Meldrum, Kerry O?Brien, and of course, Kerry Packer and Rupert Murdoch.


4. You know how to abbreviate every word, all of which usually end in -o: arvo, combo, garbo, kero, lezzo, metho, milko, muso, rego, servo, smoko, speedo, righto etc.

5. You know that some ppl pronounce Australia like ?Strayla? and that?s ok.

6. You know that there is a universal place called ?woop woop? located in the middle of nowhere? no matter where you actually are.

7. You know that while we call our friends ?mates?, we don?t use terms like ?sheila? and ?shrimp on the barbie?, contrary to popular belief.

8. You know that none of us actually drink Fosters beer, because it tastes like s***. But we let the world think we do. Because we can.

9. You?ve seen Gallipoli, Crocodile Dundee, Young Einstein, Muriel?s Wedding, The Castle, Beneath Clouds, Strictly Ballroom, 40,000 Horsemen, and maybe even WolfCreek.

10. It makes you happy when someone in Hollywood is actually Australian? Mel Gibson, Nicole Kidman, Russell Crowe, Cate Blanchett, Baz Luhrman, Elle MacPherson, Olivia Newton-John, Midnight Oil, ACDC, INXS, Greg Norman, Cathy Freeman, Dawn Fraser, Pat Rafter, Ian Thorpe?

11. One word: Skippy.

12. You know that Sydney 2000 was one of our proudest moments in history. We just f***ing rock.

13. You know that you are not going to die of cholera or other Third World diseases (remote Aboriginal communities are a different matter)

14. You know our country has never been conquered by a foreign nation (you don?t count 1788).

15. We know that the Metric system will always be better than anything inches, feet, pounds and fahrenheit will ever offer.

16. You drive on the left-hand side of the road.

17. If you?re a pedestrian and cars are stopped at a red light, you will fearlessly cross the street in front of them. ?Hit and runs? just aren?t cricket. Because Aussies stick together.

18. You know that New Zealanders are basically our naive country cousins, who have a weird fush-and-chups accent and, for some bizare reason, think that they invented pavlova. They are to be pitied. They have no hope of gaining the upper hand in the endless sporting rivalry between our two nations.

19. You know that you can?t eat Fantales alone? Otherwise who will you play the ?Who am I?? game with when you?re reading the wrapper?

20. You know that Sydney should be the capital, because Canberra is a hole.

21. You know that Americans think we?re all Steve Irwin clones. And crickey, they couldn?t be more wrong.

22. You know that lawyers wear wigs and gowns. And we make it look good.

23. You have some time in your life slept with Aeroguard on in the summer. Maybe even as perfume.

24. You feel obliged to spread salty black stuff that looks like congealed motor oil on bread? and actually grow to like it. You?ve also squeeze Vegemite through Vita Wheats to make little Vegemite worms.

25. You believe that democracy means the freedom to draw caricatures of good ol? Johnny Howard.

26. You have the ability to compress several words into one - ie ?g?day? and ?d?reckn??. This allows more space for profanities.

27. You?ve ever used the words - tops, ripper, sick, mad, rad, sweet - to mean good. And then you place ?bloody? in front of it when you REALLY mean it.

28. You know that the barbeque is a political arena; the person holding the tongs is always the boss and usually a man. And the women make the salad.

29. You say ?no worries? quite often, whether you realise it or not.

30. You know what fairy bread tastes like, and you can?t imagine your childhood without it.

31. You know the first verse to the national anthem, but still don?t know what ?girt? means. And you?re ok with that.

32. You?ve drank your tea/coffee/milo through a Tim Tam.

33. You know that backyard cricket is a nice way to bond with family and the rubbish bin. And the ?one bounce, one hand? rule always applies.

34. You know that we are home to the just about all of the world?s deadliest of animals. That?s why if anybody messes with us we?ll get some funnel webs on their asses.

35. You see people walking bare-foot on the sidewalk and don?t scorn?. because you?re doing it too.

36. You know that in summer a seat belt buckle becomes a pretty good branding iron.

36. You know what trop-fest is and it makes you happy.

37. Sausage rolls and meat pies. End of story.

38. You firmly believe that in the end, everything will be ok and have offered advice that included the words, ?she?ll be right, mate?.

39. You have a story that somehow involves an excessive consumption of booze? but you can?t remember.

40. You own a Bond?s chesty. In several different colours.

41. You?ve ordered a steak the size as your head and only paid $5 at your local RSL.

42. You know that Italy should never have been granted that fateful kick in the 2006 Soccer World Cup.

43. You know how to slip, slop, slap like it?s nobody?s business.

44. You?ve heard the Prime Minister dismiss anyone who disagrees with him simply as ?un-Australian?, and that?s enough to make us sit down and shut up.

45. You know that the value of a public holiday is measured in terms of alchohol. God bless the queen and her 4-day birthday.

46. You refer to someone you like as ?a total bastard?, but call someone you don?t like ?a bit of a bastard?.

47. You know there?s no lbw in backyard cricket, and over the fence is out.

48. You know Drop Bears exist. Positively.

49. You know that roo meat tastes pretty good, but not as good as barra. Or a meat pie.

50.You know Australia IS the best bloody place on earth. Bar none.

51.You show this to people because joking around is the Australian way.


You also know that Jason 13 is one of your own and he should be ostracised from civilised society but sadly he is still on the out and not locked up as yet
osm On March 18, 2016
Kiwi!





Wellington, New Zealand
#7New Post! Jan 18, 2010 @ 08:31:46
Haha as a New Zealander much of that makes sense to me! However i'm not so sure on the whole pity New Zealanders part though
kpharriso On November 17, 2016
Batshit crazy :)





Boganville, Australia
#8New Post! Jan 18, 2010 @ 08:33:11
@osm Said

Haha as a New Zealander much of that makes sense to me! However i'm not so sure on the whole pity New Zealanders part though



I certainly don't pity you guys... Maybe joke about your accents every once in a while though. Where Americans imitate Aussies, the Aussies take it out on you guys
Jason13 On October 22, 2010




Melbourne, Australia
#9New Post! Jan 18, 2010 @ 08:33:18
@kpharriso Said

I'm still an Aussie, I can tick most of those things... Besides, tis just a bit of fun, mate


I'm just stirrin ya!

Hell Kingswood Country was a show that was around in the 70's and had stopped by the time I was born even! My Mum was just a huge fan, saw it on foxtel, watched it, got hooked, went and bought the dvd's. To be honest, not a lot of people know it in general, especaially at your age.

But if you EVER get the chance, I highly recommend you check it out
It's a pissa!
kpharriso On November 17, 2016
Batshit crazy :)





Boganville, Australia
#11New Post! Jan 18, 2010 @ 08:34:50
@Jason13 Said

I'm just stirrin ya!

Hell Kingswood Country was a show that was around in the 70's and had stopped by the time I was born even! My Mum was just a huge fan, saw it on foxtel, watched it, got hooked, went and bought the dvd's. To be honest, not a lot of people know it in general, especaially at your age.

But if you EVER get the chance, I highly recommend you check it out
It's a pissa!



Will do, doubt it'll happen though, they hardly have anything I used to watch as a kid on... Granted they were all kids shows, but they were bloody awesome, what ever happened to Mr. Squiggle and Super Ted?
osm On March 18, 2016
Kiwi!





Wellington, New Zealand
#12New Post! Jan 18, 2010 @ 08:35:37
@kpharriso Said

I certainly don't pity you guys... Maybe joke about your accents every once in a while though. Where Americans imitate Aussies, the Aussies take it out on you guys


The same deal applies here joking about Australian accents, particularly six/sex
kpharriso On November 17, 2016
Batshit crazy :)





Boganville, Australia
#13New Post! Jan 18, 2010 @ 08:39:48
@osm Said

The same deal applies here joking about Australian accents, particularly six/sex



I have friends whose dad is Maori, love it when they slip up and accidentally say sex .

Hmm, may as well ask you, is "jandals" a New Zealand thing or are they just weird for not calling them thongs?
osm On March 18, 2016
Kiwi!





Wellington, New Zealand
#14New Post! Jan 18, 2010 @ 09:09:20
@kpharriso Said

I have friends whose dad is Maori, love it when they slip up and accidentally say sex .

Hmm, may as well ask you, is "jandals" a New Zealand thing or are they just weird for not calling them thongs?


Yeah its just what New Zealanders call them. I've never heard another country calling them jandals. Its thongs for you guys and flip flops for those in the UK and the US.
kpharriso On November 17, 2016
Batshit crazy :)





Boganville, Australia
#15New Post! Jan 18, 2010 @ 09:10:47
@osm Said

Yeah its just what New Zealanders call them. I've never heard another country calling them jandals. Its thongs for you guys and flip flops for those in the UK and the US.



It's weird... I don't like it... But each to their own I spose
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