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Women/Teens Broad Casting their Realtionship Fallouts..

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DivineBeautii On August 26, 2012




, New York
#1New Post! Dec 07, 2011 @ 05:31:56
Ok Im not taking shots at anyone or Judging anyone.. Im sharing this in hopes to strengthen and open some minds of women and the reality to what it is...

On Face Book twitter and other sites period women and teens are constantly posting thier constant break up and make ups to the point thier own friends and family hate to see you hurt but tired of you constantly complaning about it yet take no action to make it right..

We as women are over emotional some more then others and and although venting is healthy its how we vent that is the problem.. I went thru the same phase of heartbreak and weakness in my past.. I use to post my personal problems to vent and plead my ex to change pour my heart out blah blah blah. In reality ppl don't need to know your suffering it just attracts Negative energy and shows how pathetic weak & stupid at least thats how others look at it... Because one minute you post your so in love your perfect the next day you post how he cheated AGAIN then the next you're happily in love like nothing had ever happen....

But I learned alot from my experiences, one thing I learned is to know my worth, WTH am I going to beg a man to be with me who doesn't want me at that a man who ain't worth s*** to lose in the first place... Some women/teens go thru hell with their partners cause we chose to believe the fantasy of happiness they sell but deep inside we know whats real.. The times I've suffer Its cause I chose to stay and believed that b.s. knowing deep inside it was lies...

We all want to believe this time its different this time hes changing the change is for some weeks maybe 3 months and back to the same ish...

Its not about playing hard to get thats just pointless too its about putting your foot down and knowing what you deserve.... If you constantly show how weak your love is for him and regaurdless you'll forgive him its obvious he will continue... Its easier said then done but its possible love never killed anyone but phycos... LEARN LOVE YOURSELF FIRST OTHER WISE YOU CAN'T EXPECT SOMEONE ELSE TO...

Moral is stop blaming the man for your suffering he might be a piece of s*** but you the one who continues to allow that piece of s*** to hurt you time and time again... Know that you are beautiful and a man should feel lucky to have a woman like you and if he doesn't appreciate you then hes not worth your time thier too many fish in the sea....

MEN - I KNOW WOMEN AREN'T PERFECT BUT THIER ARE GOOD WOMEN OUT THIER WHO DESERVED TO BE TREATED RIGHT....
Jesswaa On August 02, 2012




, Australia
#2New Post! Dec 07, 2011 @ 06:27:29
Usually.. from my fb friends, it's easier just to block them and their posts then give two seconds to think about it!
I block the immediately if they have cries over stuff that a) the guy/girl wouldn't want them ranting about b) something I don't really want to know about and c) something that they'll regret posting if the wrong person reads it...

I don't think it is about being treated right, it's about knowing what your willing to 'settle' for etc.. If you settle for a jackass.. Prepare to be treating that way
Jennifer1984 On June 04, 2021
Returner and proud





Penzance, United Kingdom
#3New Post! Dec 07, 2011 @ 07:25:37
@DivineBeautii Said

Ok Im not taking shots at anyone or Judging anyone.. Im sharing this in hopes to strengthen and open some minds of women and the reality to what it is...

On Face Book twitter and other sites period women and teens are constantly posting thier constant break up and make ups to the point thier own friends and family hate to see you hurt but tired of you constantly complaning about it yet take no action to make it right..

We as women are over emotional some more then others and and although venting is healthy its how we vent that is the problem.. I went thru the same phase of heartbreak and weakness in my past.. I use to post my personal problems to vent and plead my ex to change pour my heart out blah blah blah. In reality ppl don't need to know your suffering it just attracts Negative energy and shows how pathetic weak & stupid at least thats how others look at it... Because one minute you post your so in love your perfect the next day you post how he cheated AGAIN then the next you're happily in love like nothing had ever happen....

But I learned alot from my experiences, one thing I learned is to know my worth, WTH am I going to beg a man to be with me who doesn't want me at that a man who ain't worth s*** to lose in the first place... Some women/teens go thru hell with their partners cause we chose to believe the fantasy of happiness they sell but deep inside we know whats real.. The times I've suffer Its cause I chose to stay and believed that b.s. knowing deep inside it was lies...

We all want to believe this time its different this time hes changing the change is for some weeks maybe 3 months and back to the same ish...

Its not about playing hard to get thats just pointless too its about putting your foot down and knowing what you deserve.... If you constantly show how weak your love is for him and regaurdless you'll forgive him its obvious he will continue... Its easier said then done but its possible love never killed anyone but phycos... LEARN LOVE YOURSELF FIRST OTHER WISE YOU CAN'T EXPECT SOMEONE ELSE TO...

Moral is stop blaming the man for your suffering he might be a piece of s*** but you the one who continues to allow that piece of s*** to hurt you time and time again... Know that you are beautiful and a man should feel lucky to have a woman like you and if he doesn't appreciate you then hes not worth your time thier too many fish in the sea....

MEN - I KNOW WOMEN AREN'T PERFECT BUT THIER ARE GOOD WOMEN OUT THIER WHO DESERVED TO BE TREATED RIGHT....



I think a lot of what you say is true, although I have to say that you come across to me as quite angry and that could lead you open to assumptions from some posters.

We, as women, are often our own worst enemy, but it's not our fault. Yes, we ARE emotional. Yes, we DO vent our frustrations. And, yes, sometimes we do fall for the same old lines of chat over and over.

But would we really want to change that aspect of ourselves..? Do we want to stop being "women" because of how we are treated by men..? I don't think so. Rather, what we need to change is how we respond to those occasions when we are treated badly.

A broken relationship, or staying in one that is abusive or unfaithful is an emotional strain that I think a lot of men find difficult to understand. Some men are able to comprehend the complexity of female emotional states, but for most, they are so deeply ingrained in the masculine macho attitude of not letting their own feelings show that the mere thought of a woman opening her heart makes her seem, in his eyes, weak and feeble.

When such a man perceives a woman to be weak, she is contemptible in his eyes. He'll use her for sex or anything else he wants, but he won't respect her and he won't be faithful or honest to her.

The women who vent on Twitter and Facebook are often only doing so because they feel there is nowhere else for them to get things off their chest. If they don't have a close friend or sister or mum who can be their "confidante" they may turn to the supposed, but false, anonymity of social networking sites. I don't think these women are being pathetic, they are making a cry for help. They have a need to communicate what they are going through and as an act of desperation they do something that is inappropriate but to them, doesn't seem that way.

So, what should she do..? Should she hide her feelings..? Bury them deep down inside and not release anything..? I don't think so. Why should she be repressed just because he is incapable of understanding her?

Of course, we would all love to have somebody to turn to, to make the tea, lend a listening ear and give out hugs and tissues. If all the women in the world had that option, Facebook and Twitter traffic would probably decline alarmingly and throw advertisers into a state of mortal panic.

But many women DON'T have that option and this is when they have to be strong. Easier said than done, I know, but I think we need to get that message out.

Women are NOT weak and feeble. We will express our feelings and men have two choices: Accept it, learn to live with it and start to show some sensitivity to their partner, or they should seriously start to reconsider their place in this relationship.

I think it goes without saying that any woman in a physically or mentally abusive relationship should seek professional help. Possibly even take police and / or legal action. There is plenty of support and advice out there, and plenty of women's groups who will help them. Women: You are not alone.

But the message has to be spread. Those of us who are fortunate enough to be in strong, loving relationships, or have good people in our lives with whom we can share our feelings, might like to take the time to make ourselves available to other women whom we might be able to help.

Solidarity, sisters..!! (cliche spoken tongue in cheek, but that's what it amounts to)

To any woman out there who reads this and is going through difficult times, please don't despair. You don't have to put up with being abused or denigrated for your feelings. Please don't think you have to pour your heart out into the world wide web. All that does is demean you further.

If you have somebody in your life who you trust and feel safe with, talk to them. If you don't, then seek help from professional groups. They're there for YOU.

Best wishes and good luck, women. Stay strong.
Eaglebauer On July 23, 2019
Moderator
Deleted



Saint Louis, Missouri
#4New Post! Dec 07, 2011 @ 07:40:20
@Jennifer1984 Said

Some men are able to comprehend the complexity of female emotional states, but for most, they are so deeply ingrained in the masculine macho attitude of not letting their own feelings show that the mere thought of a woman opening her heart makes her seem, in his eyes, weak and feeble.



How can you make such generalized accusations with a straight face? This is incredibly telling of your opinion of men, and I call it an opinion because this isn't fact, and at the same time it's disparagingly insulting towards men.

How is it that a woman living in one part of the world suddenly can speak with authority on how most men the world over think?
Jennifer1984 On June 04, 2021
Returner and proud





Penzance, United Kingdom
#5New Post! Dec 07, 2011 @ 08:43:15
@Eaglebauer Said

How can you make such generalized accusations with a straight face? This is incredibly telling of your opinion of men, and I call it an opinion because this isn't fact, and at the same time it's disparagingly insulting towards men.

How is it that a woman living in one part of the world suddenly can speak with authority on how most men the world over think?



Would you prefer me to make a post umpteen times longer in order to put in every combination of possibilities..? You lot moan about the length of my posts already..!!

I was responding to the OP's message and where you say I was generalising, I would refer you to passages such as I think a lot of men find difficult to understand

or how about... Some men are able to comprehend

and so on. It is quite clear that I am not stating ALL men, and therefore it is not a generalisation. Rather, I am pointing out specific instances where SOME.......

try to crowbar this into your head..... SOME.... men perform in certain ways.

Frankly, your message is nothing more than another personal attack specifically aimed at attacking me rather than the point I am trying to make. Please stop doing it.

If you can't read the message for what it is, objectively, then don't take your personal aggression and animosity out on me.

.
Jennifer1984 On June 04, 2021
Returner and proud





Penzance, United Kingdom
#6New Post! Dec 07, 2011 @ 08:44:43
@Eaglebauer Said

How can you make such generalized accusations with a straight face? This is incredibly telling of your opinion of men, and I call it an opinion because this isn't fact, and at the same time it's disparagingly insulting towards men.

How is it that a woman living in one part of the world suddenly can speak with authority on how most men the world over think?




Personal abuse reported. Zero tolerance.
Eaglebauer On July 23, 2019
Moderator
Deleted



Saint Louis, Missouri
#7New Post! Dec 07, 2011 @ 08:58:56
@Jennifer1984 Said

Would you prefer me to make a post umpteen times longer in order to put in every combination of possibilities..? You lot moan about the length of my posts already..!!


I've never once complained about the length of your posts, so I'm not sure what you're referring to here.


@Jennifer1984 Said


I was responding to the OP's message and where you say I was generalising, I would refer you to passages such as I think a lot of men find difficult to understand

or how about... Some men are able to comprehend

and so on. It is quite clear that I am not stating ALL men, and therefore it is not a generalisation. Rather, I am pointing out specific instances where SOME.......


I don't profess that you did claim ALL men. You did, however, state as fact that most men see women being open about their emotions as weakness and would then victimize them for it. As a man, I am insulted deeply by that statement, am I not allowed to refute it? I quoted the passage in my response in which you very clearly stated this.

Quote:
Some men are able to comprehend the complexity of female emotional states, but for most, they are so deeply ingrained in the masculine macho attitude of not letting their own feelings show that the mere thought of a woman opening her heart makes her seem, in his eyes, weak and feeble.


You didn't say this is what you think . You said "for most, they are so deeply ingrained..." and it follows from there. That is what I take issue with.

@Jennifer1984 Said


try to crowbar this into your head..... SOME.... men perform in certain ways.


I agree with you. I speak to them in my job on a daily basis, and speak to the women they do victimize, and I take not a single issue with the statement that some men mistreat women and are macho a*****es with less sense in their bodies than a doorknob has. Sure, that's true. Your message was that most men are this way. I didn't make that up...you said it very clearly and I quoted it, and I feel it is incorrect.

@Jennifer1984 Said


Frankly, your message is nothing more than another personal attack specifically aimed at attacking me rather than the point I am trying to make. Please stop doing it.

If you can't read the message for what it is, objectively, then don't take your personal aggression and animosity out on me.

.



My message was not a personal attack. It was raising issue with a generalized insult that affected me when I read it. As someone who purports to be supportive of people being open about their emotions, I would hope you would understand it for that.
Eaglebauer On July 23, 2019
Moderator
Deleted



Saint Louis, Missouri
#8New Post! Dec 07, 2011 @ 08:59:56
@Jennifer1984 Said

Personal abuse reported. Zero tolerance.



That's fine.

Your report is unfounded, but if it comes to me getting punched so be it. It's worth it to stand up for something if I feel insulted.

I meant no personal abuse.
Jennifer1984 On June 04, 2021
Returner and proud





Penzance, United Kingdom
#9New Post! Dec 07, 2011 @ 09:12:15
@Eaglebauer Said

I've never once complained about the length of your posts, so I'm not sure what you're referring to here.




I don't profess that you did claim ALL men. You did, however, state as fact that most men see women being open about their emotions as weakness and would then victimize them for it. As a man, I am insulted deeply by that statement, am I not allowed to refute it? I quoted the passage in my response in which you very clearly stated this.



You didn't say this is what you think . You said "for most, they are so deeply ingrained..." and it follows from there. That is what I take issue with.



I agree with you. I speak to them in my job on a daily basis, and speak to the women they do victimize, and I take not a single issue with the statement that some men mistreat women and are macho a*****es with less sense in their bodies than a doorknob has. Sure, that's true. Your message was that most men are this way. I didn't make that up...you said it very clearly and I quoted it, and I feel it is incorrect.




My message was not a personal attack. It was raising issue with a generalized insult that affected me when I read it. As someone who puports to be supportive of people being open about their emotions, I would hope you would understand it for that.



OK, fair comment and reasonably explained. Points accepted.

My concern in this thread is for the woman's issues involved. I do not see men as "The Enemy" in any way, rather, when it comes to being supportive of females in relationship issues my points are aimed at resolution from their side of things.

It's worth stating that if some men didn't behave in this way, these issues wouldn't arise in the first place. I think we can both agree on that.

By all means state the male side of things, that's fair and reasonable but please don't deny the female perspective simply because it offends you. Rather, I would suggest that those men who create the situations that prompt responses such as mine, would be better served if other men were to say to them "Don't behave like that, buddy".

Now.... tell me your perpsective on this if you will..... I would think that a form of "self policing" might be reasonably effective. If enough decent men were to make it clear that the behaviour of the bad guys was unacceptable, rather than, as some do, treat it all as a big joke and thus tacitly encourage it, would that not at least go some way towards combatting inappropriate behaviour..?

.
Eaglebauer On July 23, 2019
Moderator
Deleted



Saint Louis, Missouri
#10New Post! Dec 07, 2011 @ 09:25:38
@Jennifer1984 Said

OK, fair comment and reasonably explained. Points accepted.



Jennifer, I'm genuinely glad you took it that way and read my explanation. Really.

And perhaps I jumped the gun a bit in reading your post. I do know that writing long posts (and I'm referring to myself here) can sometimes lead us to use language that can be misconstrued.

@Jennifer1984 Said


My concern in this thread is for the woman's issues involved. I do not see men as "The Enemy" in any way, rather, when it comes to being supportive of females in relationship issues my points are aimed at resolution from their side of things.

It's worth stating that if some men didn't behave in this way, these issues wouldn't arise in the first place. I think we can both agree on that.

By all means state the male side of things, that's fair and reasonable but please don't deny the female perspective simply because it offends you. Rather, I would suggest that those men who create the situations that prompt responses such as mine, would be better served if other men were to say to them "Don't behave like that, buddy".

Now.... tell me your perpsective on this if you will..... I would think that a form of "self policing" might be reasonably effective. If enough decent men were to make it clear that the behaviour of the bad guys was unacceptable, rather than, as some do, treat it all as a big joke and thus tacitly encourage it, would that not at least go some way towards combatting inappropriate behaviour..?

.


Responding to the last paragraph (and thus more or less the ones that precede it):

I honestly believe the men who treat it as a joke or simply roll their eyes at it and consider it "just the problem of the people involved" are in the same group as the "bad guys" who actually commit the victimizing.

As far as self policing goes, I agree that it's a viable starting point as the type of "man" (iron-clad quotations around that for obvious reasons) who treats women poorly simply because they are women is probably going to be quicker to listen to another man than he would listen to a woman saying the same thing. I don't agree with that attitude, but it's the harsh reality for some men and I do recognize that as a real problem. The pitfall there though, and I don't know that I have a solution at hand, is that some men who are "mindless macho wonders" would simply scoff at another man telling them to respect women and shrug him off as effeminate. I don't know how to bridge that gap.
Leon On June 04, 2021




San Diego, California
#11New Post! Dec 07, 2011 @ 09:26:00
No.

Not all men see women who open up to them with their feelings as weak and people to take advantage of. Both are incredibly wide ranging accusations that seem to even indicate an equally angry ulterior as the OP's, as a result.

Some men do, and, judging from both the OP's posts and Jennifer's, I sense that they are victims of these kind of men. So, my sympathies to the both of you.

However, there are many men who enjoy and want their girls to open up to them, not so they can take advantage of them, or see them as inferior in any way, but because they truly do love them and want to know how they feel about things, their opinions on things, and what they can do to cater to them more. It's a natural result of true caring love, and the way an open relationship should be.

Not all men are careless or clueless in this regard.
Eaglebauer On July 23, 2019
Moderator
Deleted



Saint Louis, Missouri
#12New Post! Dec 07, 2011 @ 09:30:39
@Leon Said

However, there are many men who enjoy and want their girls to open up to them, not so they can take advantage of them, or see them as inferior in any way, but because they truly do love them and want to know how they feel about things, their opinions on things, and what they can do to cater to them more. It's a natural result of true caring love, and the way an open relationship should be.



If you can't say you respect a woman, you don't deserve to say that you love a woman.
Leon On June 04, 2021




San Diego, California
#13New Post! Dec 07, 2011 @ 09:34:55
@Eaglebauer Said

If you can't say you respect a woman, you don't deserve to say that you love a woman.



Well put. Love is sacrifice. Let's think about that for a second. That means putting yourself under the person, not over the person in the selfish or demeaning ways as the OP and Jennifer alluded men do.
Oisin On January 27, 2012




Glasgow, United Kingdom
#14New Post! Dec 07, 2011 @ 09:35:07
has nobody told you two that all men are bastards ?


no love, not all men are bastards, just the ones that you seem to be attracted to.
chisa96 On December 29, 2014
Supreme Goddess





Out in Nature, Wisconsin
#15New Post! Dec 07, 2011 @ 17:00:56
Hmm. So is the op more annoyed about the women who fall out and get back together with guys that walk all over them, or with that they post about it too much?
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