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TFS User-Generated Relationships/Marriage Advice

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Leon On about 3 hours ago




San Diego, California
#1New Post! Oct 05, 2012 @ 22:56:18
I thought I'd be nice to pin a thread in the Relationships subforum where users and newcomers seeking help can refer to when wanting to find ways, ideas, and do's and don'ts to nourish, strengthen, and/or improve their relationships.

Add what you think contributes to a successful relationship or brings it to the next level, as well as what you think are things to avoid doing or not doing. Of course the more detailed you are, including stories and/or practical examples, the better.

And finally, I would like to pre-emptively issue a warning not to derail this thread with humor or off topic discussion. You can go here for that.
rosexthorn On December 01, 2020




Winnipeg, Canada
#2New Post! Oct 06, 2012 @ 16:08:27
First thing not to do is 'rush' anything, let things happen on their own and you're off to a good start.
ReAdSaLoT On September 23, 2019




,
#3New Post! Oct 06, 2012 @ 16:20:52
Go very slowwwwwwwwwwwwwly.
Sparklegirl On December 13, 2019
LL.M





Cumbria, United Kingdom
#4New Post! Oct 06, 2012 @ 19:55:27
Start off on a strong friendship basis and take time to get to know each other properly- likes, dislikes, hopes and future aspirations. Be protective of the other persons feelings/emotions and be trusting and respectful to each other. Make time for each other to be silly and to take time away from the usual ties of daily life
steve70 On May 21, 2016




, United Kingdom
#5New Post! Oct 06, 2012 @ 20:55:27
just be yourself
boobear On August 15, 2016




London, United Kingdom
#6New Post! Oct 07, 2012 @ 07:08:57
Communicate, communicate, communicate.
Laugh, have fun in your relationship.
Date nights.
Turn the tv off at least once a week. Go out, talk, play a board game, any other business
Dark_Tink On December 30, 2018
<3 Boobie <3





, Canada
#7New Post! Oct 07, 2012 @ 15:18:21
-When dating, if you "get that feeling" that something just isn't right...TRUST THAT FEELING!!

-It may seem wrong to some, but in this day and age, if you have legitimate concerns about the person you are with, do a background check.

-As others have said: Take it slow. You have to get to know one another before getting serious. Don't rush marriage either. A long engagement is not a bad thing. There is no law that says you have to get married 1yr to the day that you got engaged.

Hubby proposed to me after 6monts of dating. We didn't get married until almost 3yrs later. I in no way wanted to rush getting married. 10yrs later, we love each other more now then ever.

-COMMUNICATION is the key. Also, if you let the little things that bother you about your spouse fester, it leads to resentment and stupid a** fights.
rosexthorn On December 01, 2020




Winnipeg, Canada
#8New Post! Oct 07, 2012 @ 15:33:51
@Dark_Tink Said

-When dating, if you "get that feeling" that something just isn't right...TRUST THAT FEELING!!

-It may seem wrong to some, but in this day and age, if you have legitimate concerns about the person you are with, do a background check.

-As others have said: Take it slow. You have to get to know one another before getting serious. Don't rush marriage either. A long engagement is not a bad thing. There is no law that says you have to get married 1yr to the day that you got engaged.

Hubby proposed to me after 6monts of dating. We didn't get married until almost 3yrs later. I in no way wanted to rush getting married. 10yrs later, we love each other more now then ever.

-COMMUNICATION is the key. Also, if you let the little things that bother you about your spouse fester, it leads to resentment and stupid a** fights.



^^^^^^!
Electric_Banana On November 23, 2020




, New Zealand
#9New Post! Oct 07, 2012 @ 17:52:02
@Leon Said

I thought I'd be nice to pin a thread in the Relationships subforum where users and newcomers seeking help can refer to when wanting to find ways, ideas, and do's and don'ts to nourish, strengthen, and/or improve their relationships.

Add what you think contributes to a successful relationship or brings it to the next level, as well as what you think are things to avoid doing or not doing. Of course the more detailed you are, including stories and/or practical examples, the better.

And finally, I would like to pre-emptively issue a warning not to derail this thread with humor or off topic discussion. You can go here for that.



This outta be creepy-funny seeing as most of us are Conspiracy/Philosophy fanatics and not all that romantic.
DuLu On January 11, 2017
CHOOSE HAPPINESS!!!





Waverly, Washington
#10New Post! Oct 08, 2012 @ 01:13:52
Do things together.
Respect each others differences, and each other's privacy.
DuLu On January 11, 2017
CHOOSE HAPPINESS!!!





Waverly, Washington
#11New Post! Oct 08, 2012 @ 01:16:15
Oh, oh, oh - what are my credential
for offering what I posted in my previous post?

...30 years of marriage - we like who we are and
where we are at in life. To some, that may sound
boring - but He's my angel!
Tar On April 28, 2014




San Antonio, Texas
#12New Post! Oct 08, 2012 @ 02:58:23
Love yourself before you get into a relationship.

Know yourself before you get into a relationship.

Accept that we are all flawed and no one is beyond reproach.

Always speak with "I feel" instead of "you do".

Never lie... EVER. No "white lies" no "fibs" and no "liberties with the truth" or "bending". Be absolutely honest with your partner, always. No negotiation

Love like its the first time. Don't make your partner pay for your past hurts. If you can't, then go back to lines 1 and 2

Say "I'm sorry", then figure out a plan to fix it, then follow through

Keep your promises!

Concentrate on each other's good qualities, but work together on how to improve on each other's weaknesses

Spend time together, QUALITY time in which you both interact. This does NOT include watching TV together.

Exercise together. Keep each other active and healthy

Support each other, emotionally, physically, mentally, etc.

Have lots of sex, even when you don't feel in the mood. If you aren't in the mood a lot, find out why not and work on it. Sex is VERY important as it often acts as a bonding agent between mates.

Laugh together

Tell stories to each other, personal ones.

Encourage each other

Remind each other how proud you are of the other

Discuss all the big decisions together, and most of the smaller ones too. (the petty ones you can usually do without).

Don't raise your voice during arguments. The louder you WANT to scream, the quieter you SHOULD speak.

Live together as if you are trying to set an example for what relationships SHOULD be... because you are. Your children will look to you as an example, so be a good one!
EoWyN On April 01, 2015
Lucky Me!


Deleted



Under your bed,
#13New Post! Oct 25, 2012 @ 09:52:01
@Tar Said

Love yourself before you get into a relationship.

Know yourself before you get into a relationship.

Accept that we are all flawed and no one is beyond reproach.

Always speak with "I feel" instead of "you do".

Never lie... EVER. No "white lies" no "fibs" and no "liberties with the truth" or "bending". Be absolutely honest with your partner, always. No negotiation

Love like its the first time. Don't make your partner pay for your past hurts. If you can't, then go back to lines 1 and 2

Say "I'm sorry", then figure out a plan to fix it, then follow through

Keep your promises!

Concentrate on each other's good qualities, but work together on how to improve on each other's weaknesses

Spend time together, QUALITY time in which you both interact. This does NOT include watching TV together.

Exercise together. Keep each other active and healthy

Support each other, emotionally, physically, mentally, etc.

Have lots of sex, even when you don't feel in the mood. If you aren't in the mood a lot, find out why not and work on it. Sex is VERY important as it often acts as a bonding agent between mates.

Laugh together

Tell stories to each other, personal ones.

Encourage each other

Remind each other how proud you are of the other

Discuss all the big decisions together, and most of the smaller ones too. (the petty ones you can usually do without).

Don't raise your voice during arguments. The louder you WANT to scream, the quieter you SHOULD speak.

Live together as if you are trying to set an example for what relationships SHOULD be... because you are. Your children will look to you as an example, so be a good one!



I could not agree more
Deal_With_It On December 02, 2020




Stevens Pass, Washington
#14New Post! Oct 25, 2012 @ 16:23:02
@Tar Said

Love yourself before you get into a relationship.

Know yourself before you get into a relationship.

Accept that we are all flawed and no one is beyond reproach.

Always speak with "I feel" instead of "you do".

Never lie... EVER. No "white lies" no "fibs" and no "liberties with the truth" or "bending". Be absolutely honest with your partner, always. No negotiation

Love like its the first time. Don't make your partner pay for your past hurts. If you can't, then go back to lines 1 and 2

Say "I'm sorry", then figure out a plan to fix it, then follow through

Keep your promises!

Concentrate on each other's good qualities, but work together on how to improve on each other's weaknesses

Spend time together, QUALITY time in which you both interact. This does NOT include watching TV together.

Exercise together. Keep each other active and healthy

Support each other, emotionally, physically, mentally, etc.

Have lots of sex, even when you don't feel in the mood. If you aren't in the mood a lot, find out why not and work on it. Sex is VERY important as it often acts as a bonding agent between mates.

Laugh together

Tell stories to each other, personal ones.

Encourage each other

Remind each other how proud you are of the other

Discuss all the big decisions together, and most of the smaller ones too. (the petty ones you can usually do without).

Don't raise your voice during arguments. The louder you WANT to scream, the quieter you SHOULD speak.

Live together as if you are trying to set an example for what relationships SHOULD be... because you are. Your children will look to you as an example, so be a good one!

Great post Tar.
treebee On April 13, 2015
Government Hooker

Moderator




London, United Kingdom
#15New Post! Oct 25, 2012 @ 16:29:34
Being stroppy about stupid s*** is only harming yourself.
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