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treebee On April 13, 2015
Government Hooker

Moderator




London, United Kingdom
#16New Post! Oct 28, 2006 @ 10:42:18
People who commit suicide are sick, yes to everyone else it appears they are being selfish. They are trapped in genuine depression, they genuinely feel that the world will be a better place without them. Thier kids, families, freinds will actually benefit from them not being there any more. If they run away someone will find them or they will relent and return to thier life. So the only way out is to kill yourself and make a good job of it too.

Its a sad dark place to be and very, very difficult to listen to any reason because when you 100% beleive that you are doing everyone a favour by killing yourself it appears to be the only option.

Feeling suicidal is a mental state, there is no choice in the matter. Yes people DO sink that low, it really is rock bottom.

The people left behind feel so angry, at the person dead and themselves for not being able to help.

Cries for help are seldom noticed, the person may talk about death a lot, ask people how they want to die, if they were gonna kill themselves how would they do it?

I truly beleive that a few words, a little time invested in someone, usually a stranger, just as a lifeline when they feel suidical actually works.

So when someone says "i just want to end it" or "i think im going to do something stupid" i always take a little time to talk to them, direct them to professionals, or just chat a while until thier mood lifts enough to get them through another night. Whether they mean it or not, its no cost to me to spend a little time speaking to them.
Darkshine On May 05, 2010




Sydney, Australia
#17New Post! Oct 28, 2006 @ 10:49:29
Yeah I'm not going to come into this thread. I'm just going to leave it at;
It is not a selfish act. Sometimes I cannot comprehend why i would want to take
my life and others I can?very much so. It's not something you can judge from
the outside. Like Treebee said, talk people through the night if you have to or
just chat if you have any concerns. It's nothing to you to spend an hour and a
half being nice and having someone live. I've done it and people've done it for
me. I can't thanks those who have enough.

Now thats where I leave it. I don't really want to go into this much.
brainfarmer On February 09, 2007




huddersfield, United Kingdom
#18New Post! Oct 28, 2006 @ 10:51:23
i just really find the term selfish a terrible lablel for people who take that course. the term selfish seems to apply more to those who are more bothered about how they feel rather than trying to understand how a suicidal person must feel.
treebee On April 13, 2015
Government Hooker

Moderator




London, United Kingdom
#19New Post! Oct 28, 2006 @ 10:55:17
Well to be fair, if you have never hit rock bottom, you wouldnt really understand it. To some people it does seem selfish but then the concept of leaving your kids and family and freinds behind like that is horrific. Unfortunately mental illness doesnt have that reasoning.
brainfarmer On February 09, 2007




huddersfield, United Kingdom
#20New Post! Oct 28, 2006 @ 11:00:11
if you treat mental illness as a disease and suicide as a likely outcome in some forms of the illness, calling a person who commits suicide selfish would be like me calling a family member who gets cancer and dies selfish for being ill. of course thats my opinion.
treebee On April 13, 2015
Government Hooker

Moderator




London, United Kingdom
#21New Post! Oct 28, 2006 @ 11:04:40
@brainfarmer Said
if you treat mental illness as a disease and suicide as a likely outcome in some forms of the illness, calling a person who commits suicide selfish would be like me calling a family member who gets cancer and dies selfish for being ill. of course thats my opinion.


I see what you are saying and agree with your opinion. And people do get mad at people for getting cancer too. I guess its just how people perceive things differently.
chaski On about 15 hours ago
Stalker





Tree at Floydgirrl's Window,
#22New Post! Oct 29, 2006 @ 00:27:07
the thing is, there is no easy answer and there is no "one size fits all answer".

There was woman (in Oregon I think) that went to the "trouble" of making all of the legal arangements for physicial assisted suicide...but when the time came she chose to "fight" to the last breath.

And there is a thing called "blue suicide"....the person does not have the will to kill themselves so they get into a situation where a cop will essentially have to do it for them.

And there are desperate people that have no where to turn...or at least feel like they have no where to turn. Families and friends can be very unforgiving...unable or unwilling to listen. (the lost art to listening)

we should have compasion...life can be so crushing
digidave On May 24, 2007




Townsville, Australia
#23New Post! Oct 29, 2006 @ 01:35:45
@silenthunder Said
Many years ago I had some one close to me commit suicide. Hind sight being 20/20, I could see how their actions were the end result of a long chain of self-destructive behavior.

Has anyone known some one close that committed suicide?

How did it affect you personally?


my cousin blew his own head off with a shotgun.

that was his choice, i suppose - i guess he just never developed the coping skills he needed?

worst thing was his brother found him

and i guess that's the cost - the "victim" isn't the deceased - they have achieved the sweet oblivion the craved so dearly - the "victims" are those left behind to clean up, who will always be plagued by the questions - "could i have done more?" "could I have been more available" etc,.etc,.
sono_hito On November 09, 2007




Provo, Utah
#24New Post! Oct 29, 2006 @ 02:24:00
while i understand that my circumstances where far from normal, my problem was not that people would not listen, but that i had valid enough arguments for my depression to likewise make others depressed. and even when i explained my problems to a professional, he had nothing else to say to me but "just hang on" with a sad look on his face. he had no reasoning he could think of to sway my argument. it was that bad. in the end i just didn't do it, nothing more or less.

i have nothing but sympathy for the people that are affected by those that commit suicide. but please, do not blame the person who does it for the feelings it makes in others.while this is the easiest way of coping, its pushing too much on the other person rather than actually understanding the circumstances. many times the person has little other recourse than the one they took. most are just people who have mental problems, and they are unable to help it just as any other disease ridden person can help it. dont blame the medical condition, blame the root cause and become stronger from knowing.
claire On September 15, 2009




Perth, Australia
#25New Post! Oct 29, 2006 @ 12:50:19
One of my close friends went out with this guy, he clearly has a few screws loose, when she broke up with him he became extremely obssessive, to the point where one could class him as a stalker.

He'd send her 50 txt messages a day and bombard her with endless phone calls, enter her house without invititation etc etc.

One day he said to her, that if she didn't go back out with him he'd kill himself.
The a few hours before he jumped off a bridge, he rang an Ambulance and also my friend to rub it in that je was going to do it and it was her fault.

He jumped, but ended up in hospital with spinal injuries. When my friend went to see him, because she felt incredibly guilty, he flat out turned to her and accused her of practically pushing him over the edge.

He never really wanted to kill hiself, he was just trying to manipulate this girl into being with him again...pathetic!
Today she is friends with him, but only because it's the only way he'll stop harassing her. Plus everytime they have a fight, he says he's going to jump....

Some people are so incredibly low.
live_a_lie On May 08, 2011




, United Kingdom
#26New Post! Oct 29, 2006 @ 13:05:15
@claire Said
One of my close friends went out with this guy, he clearly has a few screws loose, when she broke up with him he became extremely obssessive, to the point where one could class him as a stalker.

He'd send her 50 txt messages a day and bombard her with endless phone calls, enter her house without invititation etc etc.

One day he said to her, that if she didn't go back out with him he'd kill himself.
The a few hours before he jumped off a bridge, he rang an Ambulance and also my friend to rub it in that je was going to do it and it was her fault.

He jumped, but ended up in hospital with spinal injuries. When my friend went to see him, because she felt incredibly guilty, he flat out turned to her and accused her of practically pushing him over the edge.

He never really wanted to kill hiself, he was just trying to manipulate this girl into being with him again...pathetic!
Today she is friends with him, but only because it's the only way he'll stop harassing her. Plus everytime they have a fight, he says he's going to jump....

Some people are so incredibly low.


Thats horribile, your poor friend!! I would hate to be put into the position where I had no choice but to stay friends with this guy or he would kill myself! I would feel so guilty it would really make me unhappy! I feel for your friend I really do!
brainfarmer On February 09, 2007




huddersfield, United Kingdom
#27New Post! Oct 29, 2006 @ 13:07:34
i would say the point is not to give in to the blackmail. whilst im very sympathetic to people who are driven to kill themselves i have no time for blackmail.
claire On September 15, 2009




Perth, Australia
#28New Post! Oct 30, 2006 @ 05:48:27
brianfarmer:

Your absolutely right, blackmail is not exceptable. But she doesn't see it that way. He's got her wrapped around his finger, she feels trapped and the reason she's friends with him is because he makes her feel like she doesn't have a choice....even though people stress to her that how he's treating her is a crime, she doesn't want to feel guilty anymore, and she's afraid that if she tells him to F*%k off he'll jump.

Why should anyone feel sympathetic towards this guy?
He's not really suicidal, he just wants her attention, and he knows it's a sure way to manipulate her into getting what he wants.
Personally I've had enough...maybe if he jumped and killed himself that would be the best thing for everyone. I mean sure people will be feeling guilty and upset, including myself, for a while but i think he'd be truely doing everyone a favour. As harsh as that sounds, it's how it's become, only in death will my friend be released from his grasp, I'll be here with others to help her get over the guilt....
marshalljackson On May 05, 2007




Wellington, New Zealand
#29New Post! Oct 30, 2006 @ 05:52:45
@silenthunder Said
Agreed.

It is interesting, at least to me, that in third world countries; where the struggle from the time one awakens is to feed one's hunger; suicide is virtually unknown.


Indeed
silenthunder On November 25, 2007




Halliburton, Texas
#30New Post! Oct 30, 2006 @ 20:09:39
I saw an MSNBC special last night about rage killings, which seems to be a variation of suicide. Seems primarily an American issue at this point. They claim to have about 30 of them a year.

The suicidal person goes into a fastfood place or restaurant with firearms and kills as many folks as he can before taking his own life.

One of these folks actually videotaped themselves the night before talking about how it was time for "a little payback" for everything everyone had done to him and how relieved he was that it was finally over and he wouldn't have to be tormented any longer.

This was absolutely one of the most disturbing things that I've seen in a long time.
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