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Mate quality

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El_Tino On August 10, 2020
booyaka!





Albuquerque, New Mexico
#1New Post! Jun 03, 2005 @ 17:41:19
When it comes to relationships, psychologists say that people tend to go for those who are around the same "quality" as themselves (whatever they deem quality to be).

If you go with someone too high above you, they'll leave you. If you go with someone too far below you, you'll leave them.

Now, in all of this it's important to know your own quality. If you rate yourself too high, you go for people who would leave you anyway. If you rate yourself too low, you go for people who will eventually bore you.

Now, there ARE other factors that go into a relationship, so don't draw any conclusions about your relationships from this.

So, people will tend to reject those who are too high above them or too far below them.

I wish I knew my quality
averagejoe On September 03, 2008




O'Fallon, Illinois
#2New Post! Jun 03, 2005 @ 17:47:50
Having problems figuring that one out?

E-Harmoney.com
Free evaluation too. Check it out.
El_Tino On August 10, 2020
booyaka!





Albuquerque, New Mexico
#3New Post! Jun 03, 2005 @ 17:51:29
Well I know about e-harmony and they might take some of the other factors into account, but I'm not really talking about the same thing.

Here when I talk about mate quality, that's more like attractiveness, earning potential, etc.
averagejoe On September 03, 2008




O'Fallon, Illinois
#4New Post! Jun 03, 2005 @ 18:03:28
We'll, we all have to be attrated in some fashion, to want a good relationship to work. There are a lot of things that can attract a mate. For those that just want a fling, I'm sure the outside of the package will need to be very appealing, although that is just an opinion. For long termers,
what's inside the package is what is most important. Dating is the un-wrapping phase, and even if you were just out for a fling in the beginning, you may find that opening the package is getting more and more tempting. And long termers don't always get a gift that keeps on giving. In any case don't rush. Get familar with the contents inside. Get to know someone.
El_Tino On August 10, 2020
booyaka!





Albuquerque, New Mexico
#5New Post! Jun 03, 2005 @ 18:04:58
well when I said attractiveness what I meant was physical attractiveness.

Of course, by dating someone is the only way you can really judge their quality.
angel21 On May 22, 2009




Co. Durham, United Kingdom
#6New Post! Jun 03, 2005 @ 18:05:57
people who say everyone is attractive are usually ugly
averagejoe On September 03, 2008




O'Fallon, Illinois
#7New Post! Jun 03, 2005 @ 18:08:40
@el_tino Said
well when I said attractiveness what I meant was physical attractiveness.

Of course, by dating someone is the only way you can really judge their quality.


ah.
twiztidangel On May 19, 2010
Why So Serious?





kingdom of muggles, Canada
#8New Post! Jun 03, 2005 @ 18:19:52
well sometimes when you get into a relationship (either with someone better or not so much) i guess it depends on how much you would sacrafice in a relationship

averagejoe On September 03, 2008




O'Fallon, Illinois
#9New Post! Jun 03, 2005 @ 18:23:01
@twiztidangel Said
well sometimes when you get into a relationship (either with someone better or not so much) i guess it depends on how much you would sacrafice in a relationship



Yes. As a married man, it's about somewhat about sacrifice and little tolerance, to achieve a loving relationship. But only sacrifice what you won't miss.

Oh let's not forget communication which is equally as important.
twiztidangel On May 19, 2010
Why So Serious?





kingdom of muggles, Canada
#10New Post! Jun 03, 2005 @ 18:24:14
theres tons of things that make up a relationship.. the basic key points are
trust
communication
loyalty
and sacrafice

if you cant have any of those in a relationship and all you do is point out flaws upon your mate then something is wrong.
El_Tino On August 10, 2020
booyaka!





Albuquerque, New Mexico
#11New Post! Jun 03, 2005 @ 18:37:00
@twiztidangel Said

if you cant have any of those in a relationship and all you do is point out flaws upon your mate then something is wrong.


definitely.
averagejoe On September 03, 2008




O'Fallon, Illinois
#12New Post! Jun 03, 2005 @ 18:50:37
Oh how could I forget? Trust!

Yah that is a MAJOR one for some of us. Not me trusting her, rather her trusting me.
twiztidangel On May 19, 2010
Why So Serious?





kingdom of muggles, Canada
#13New Post! Jun 03, 2005 @ 18:57:47
yeah, well if one cant trust another in a relationship it just causes more problems and more stress that you could easily save yourself
angel21 On May 22, 2009




Co. Durham, United Kingdom
#14New Post! Jun 03, 2005 @ 18:59:41
tyhere is no point to a relationship if you dont have trust
twiztidangel On May 19, 2010
Why So Serious?





kingdom of muggles, Canada
#15New Post! Jun 03, 2005 @ 19:01:44
exactly.
but its not all trust your mate. you also have to have trust in yourself. knowing that you wont do anything to jepordize your relationship..
like someone mentioned in lilis journal.. when your in a relationship its about TWO people, yourself and your mate.
Its hard if your greedy and stubborn because nothing gets accomplished.

lol, i think im getting off topic.
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