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How the heck am I supposed to make friends, let alone meet "someone"?!?!?!

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brookeworm On January 22, 2017




State College, Pennsylvania
#1New Post! Jan 22, 2017 @ 02:35:40
I literally have no friends. I'm not being dramatic. I go to class, go to my internship and then go home to my empty apartment that I share with my fish. I know statistically there are others like me around campus, but it seems like everyone knows each other. I've been living at my school for two years now and have no relationships (friendly or otherwise) to show for it. I joined a club but still, no luck. How the heck does anyone make friends? I just joined this site b/c I've started going crazy from the lack of connecting to anyone. I am shy/introverted, but geez I never knew I could feel so empty like this. Sorry for the rant. How did you guys meet/make friends that weren't from high school?
shinobinoz On May 28, 2017
Stnd w Standing Rock





Wichita, Kansas
#2New Post! Jan 22, 2017 @ 02:43:49
@brookeworm Said

I literally have no friends. I'm not being dramatic. I go to class, go to my internship and then go home to my empty apartment that I share with my fish. I know statistically there are others like me around campus, but it seems like everyone knows each other. I've been living at my school for two years now and have no relationships (friendly or otherwise) to show for it. I joined a club but still, no luck. How the heck does anyone make friends? I just joined this site b/c I've started going crazy from the lack of connecting to anyone. I am shy/introverted, but geez I never knew I could feel so empty like this. Sorry for the rant. How did you guys meet/make friends that weren't from high school?


Ya gots one now!
brookeworm On January 22, 2017




State College, Pennsylvania
#3New Post! Jan 22, 2017 @ 02:46:26
Hi
shinobinoz On May 28, 2017
Stnd w Standing Rock





Wichita, Kansas
#4New Post! Jan 22, 2017 @ 02:50:54
@brookeworm Said

I literally have no friends. I'm not being dramatic. I go to class, go to my internship and then go home to my empty apartment that I share with my fish. I know statistically there are others like me around campus, but it seems like everyone knows each other. I've been living at my school for two years now and have no relationships (friendly or otherwise) to show for it. I joined a club but still, no luck. How the heck does anyone make friends? I just joined this site b/c I've started going crazy from the lack of connecting to anyone. I am shy/introverted, but geez I never knew I could feel so empty like this. Sorry for the rant. How did you guys meet/make friends that weren't from high school?


If you were like me- I was extremely shy! I made it a point to do what it sounds like you are doing. Get around people. Now just start talking to them but more importantly listen to them. Find the things in common you like. Small talk is fine but think of something interesting to you or what you think might interest them. If you see someone like yourself. There you have something already in common. They most likely would love someone to talk to. Just keep it short & see if they react positively next time you see them (you don't want to be one who over does it as that might creep others out)
I went to teach at summer camp in another state, conversed with & then dated people from different countries (they seem much more approachable then many americans), joined a fraternity (animal house anyone?). At least that worked well for me.
brookeworm On January 22, 2017




State College, Pennsylvania
#5New Post! Jan 22, 2017 @ 02:59:55
I've been trying to be around people more. It's just hard doing that while balancing my time with class work and especially my internship, it sucks up so much time. My conversation skills are a bit shot, so I thought talking to people on here would help me develop those skills again.
shinobinoz On May 28, 2017
Stnd w Standing Rock





Wichita, Kansas
#6New Post! Jan 22, 2017 @ 03:01:34
@brookeworm Said

I've been trying to be around people more. It's just hard doing that while balancing my time with class work and especially my internship, it sucks up so much time. My conversation skills are a bit shot, so I thought talking to people on here would help me develop those skills again.


We will be more than happy to oblige!
Ratty On about 14 hours ago




So Cal, California
#7New Post! Jan 22, 2017 @ 05:04:20
@brookeworm Said

I literally have no friends. I'm not being dramatic. I go to class, go to my internship and then go home to my empty apartment that I share with my fish. I know statistically there are others like me around campus, but it seems like everyone knows each other. I've been living at my school for two years now and have no relationships (friendly or otherwise) to show for it. I joined a club but still, no luck. How the heck does anyone make friends? I just joined this site b/c I've started going crazy from the lack of connecting to anyone. I am shy/introverted, but geez I never knew I could feel so empty like this. Sorry for the rant. How did you guys meet/make friends that weren't from high school?


I'm sorry you're struggling right now. Just keep trying to get yourself out there. It's harder for people like us. I'm a quieter shy introvert too. When people give this line about understanding how you feel, well, I truly do, my spouse is the same way, probably more so than I am. I can fake it at times and appear to be somewhat outgoing at times. Fake it til you make it is a phrase that does indeed have some merit to it.

I don't have many friends in my life, but I sorta chose that lifestyle. I'm much older than you and I have found that due to my lone wolf tendencies that friends sometimes want more than I wanna give, but that's another story.

You're a young person going to college so try to get yourself out there as much as you can, because the cold hard truth is is that once you get a bit older and get into the work force it gets tougher to make friend because people have a lot of commitments with work and burgeoning families as we go through our 20 into our 30's. Look for group activities and while I know as a shy introvert that probably doesn't sound like an easy thing but try, try to make yourself step out of the shadows a bit.

Best of luck to you. I wish young people the best.
twilitezone911 On March 25, 2019




Saint Louis, Missouri
#8New Post! Jan 22, 2017 @ 06:04:58
i was in my 20's, it is harder to find friends in the real world, not high school or college. i think you are around kids at your age.

you live college campus, you have roommates. you make friends and you have classes, you make friends that way.

when you live on your own in own apartment, or whattever, you by yourself. maybe, roommates or girlfriend or boy friend. you have friends.

i lived with my mom until i was 28, it got the point, that honeymoon was over. my sibling, or at least, my brother told me that living with my mom. it was being a marriage. my mom and i were old marriage couple, we fight a lot and we had our good time and bad times. it got to the point that i had living my own apartment.

i can relate what the op is feeling, you have nobody to hang out with. in time, you make friends.

with me, i like living on my own, i had friends since i lived on my own. i found it easy to not to have friends over that much to my apartment. i like beingby myself, not to have talk to people all the time.

occasionally, i see one of my friends in public and said " hello" to them. maybe, get together for a lunch or dinner, or something. but that about it, i found that i am like be on my own, more than have company over the years.

i have admit in my 20's and 30's, it was rough for me to accept that i want friends. also, i admit to myself, that it is ok to be alone. i didn't be shame of it.

i'll be 60 in november, this first time that i am content with my life. i like being alone. that i have go out my way to make a friend, just because i am alone.

in may way in my life for years, i didn't like myself. now, i like myself. i am happy!
Daninad07 On January 23, 2017




Belmont, North Carolina
#9New Post! Jan 22, 2017 @ 07:47:29
I know when younger I'd go to friends houses and their parents would be having card game get togethers, another ...we would go to church and places they'd take the kids, my gmaw had 13 brothers and sisters and we'd have reunions..they'd marry and have kids too. During high school i'd go out but drink to much to fast and after school it was the same thing until I had kids. I waited on the daddy to find I was just a punching bag here and there and found the friends visiting were his friends and the 1 friend that was dating his friend well she was treated the same way. When I left him and was working ...we worked with 15 minute breaks. I can remember how I use to think I was going to live like, it makes me feel comfortable young and not as many categories as my mind now has going on. I have so many specifics to what I expect now that I probably won't date anymore although if two people attract one another I will move/action for the purpose of happiness and use what I've learned over the years.Someone in the family has to be the organizer: reunions or simple get togethers.I guess meeting from chatting online is a good idea especially if you are looking for the perfect match.
earz On March 12, 2017




ask me, United Kingdom
#10New Post! Jan 22, 2017 @ 10:30:29
Hey

I was like that too, with a punch of social anxiety thrown in.

Eventually more outgoing people started talking to me, just because I either saw them at uni every day or because I worked with them. Proximity after a period of time makes it easier. Working made it easier for me to talk to people, I gained a lot of confidence just from my first proper job.

Smiling at people helps, not a crazy grin, just a small smile to show you are friendly and approachable seems to make a difference.

In terms of the love life side of things... online dating. Or not even dating, just chatting. Even if you don't meet "the one", you might meet some friends along the way.
shinobinoz On May 28, 2017
Stnd w Standing Rock





Wichita, Kansas
#11New Post! Jan 22, 2017 @ 16:02:03
So Brookeworm- after the responses here Sounds like you be normal!
Electric_Banana On April 05, 2020




, New Zealand
#12New Post! Jan 23, 2017 @ 13:46:45
For us Generation X'rs it was us guys at home alone with our fish

Oh how the tables turn.
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