Elton John becomes a father

@catiebuggg Said

I think it's beautiful. I don't necessarily believe in it. It's really hard to grasp how that will work out? I couldn't imagine having 2 fathers instead of a mother and a father. But who's to say it won't work? It's no one else's business what Elton John does so long as that child is taken care of and not abused or neglected. He should be able to live his life the way he wants. It's obviously going to cause problems and there will be an uproar. That's inevitable, but for me? Congratulations to him and his partner.

@Jennifer1984 Said

Thank you for your comments, Catie and in a nutshell you have encapsulated some of the things which the homosexual community would like to see die out.

Firstly, it is good to see that you think of the event as a "beautiful" thing. Thank you for that comment because yes... it is beautiful. The birth of any child is beautiful.

But you then say you don't necessarily believe in it, and I'd question that. Why don't you believe in it..? Where is the problem..? I don't think you are being anti-homosexual but rather, I think your comment arises from the probability that gay men becoming parents goes against what you have been taught since you were young.

Would I be right in assuming you were brought up to believe in the nuclear family... Mummy, daddy, baby. Because this concept is so ingrained in our thinking, then anything that is outside of this is difficult to grasp.

But this is the kind of thinking that needs to be adjusted. Not changed, but simply adjusted to understand that the goalposts have moved. Just a little. The notion that two people of the same gender raising children is somehow strange is the line of thought that needs to be challenged.

As regards your other point, that the child himself may feel uncomfortable with himself, well, that is down to the heterosexual community, isn't it..?

If the boy is brought up in a happy, loving household he will grow up feeling completely at ease with his circumstances. The only time he will ever feel uncomfortable is if somebody starts to tell him his fathers are "queer".... or that he is "unnatural". And who is going to do that..? Not the homosexual community, that's for sure.

The only people who may make him feel uncomfortable will be those heterosexuals who cannot or will not accept him for who he is, and will only see the circumstances of his conception, birth and parental situation.

This is where the challenge lies, Catie.... educating the heterosexual community to simply accept the person for who he is and saying that the circumstances that brought him into the world don't really matter.

He may grow into a wonderful human being, capable of doing amazing things.... He may become a husband himself one day and father his own children.... Doesn't he deserve that chance without the malicious and narrow minded doing their best to de-rail his life before it even starts.?

It's not only Elton John who is in this situation. I can only speak for my own country, and in the UK there are an increasing number of births to same-sex couples. I foresee that within a generation every classroom in the country could have at least one child growing up in a same-sex family. At this time, these children are still infants and are not yet exposed to the bearpit of the school playground. We need to challenge the thinking of those hetero adults who would instill antisocial, homophobic behaviour into their kids before it gets to that point.

If heterosexual parents really...... REALLY.... care about the well being of their children, don't they owe it to them to teach them tolerance, kindness, understanding and acceptance..? Do you want your children to be good young people..? Or do you want them to grow up filled with hate, fear, violence and bigotry...?

It's your call.

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@treebee Said

He and David are a bit old to become first time parents. Still, good luck to them. I hope they manage to have a relatively normal experience and dont cop out employing staff to do the mucky stuff.

@catiebuggg Said

You really went over board with it. I'm not against it at all. I think it's beautiful, like I said. I do have a hard time grasping the concept. I wasn't raised that way. I've never seen it before. I've never been around it. I've been around homosexuals. Never watched them raise children. It just doesn't make sense in my mind. But I'm not against it. Like I said no each his own. Just because it's not something I believe it, doesn't mean I can't tolerate it. I was taught tolerance. I accept it. It doesn't make me uncomfortable. And I think as long as they take care of love that child as their own, just like a heterosexual would love his or her child, then the child will be fine. And everything will work. I think it's great and I'm glad he has the balls to do it.. it's just not something I can grasp. Maybe in 10 or 20 years when you see it everywhere. It's new for me. All in all, congrats to Elton John and his partner and I wish them all the blessing in the world.

@Jennifer1984 Said

Please don't take my comments so personally. There was nothing personal intended.

I simply made the point that your thinking was typical of almost the entire heterosexual community, about gay parenting, and this is the mentality that needs to be challenged.

I wasn't implying that you were a bad person, merely drawing attention to a line of thinking that is very prevalent, but is slowly but surely becoming anachronistic.

If you could only see things from the homosexual angle you too may notice the little things in what you say, but you can't see it because you aren't "walking in our shoes", as the proverb goes.

For instance (and this is just one example): Your final paragraph says you wish Elton John and his partner all the blessing in the world. I'm sure you mean that very sincerely and with all generosity. But why couldn't you say "Elton John and his husband..? They are married, after all.

I know it is a little point, but it's all the little things that make up the big picture. I once decided to test this point by deliberately using the word "partner" in the context of married heterosexual couples I talked with and I was picked up on it on many occasions, sometimes in a clearly irritated way, it would be "He's not my partner, he's my HUSBAND". Now, if the straights expect the proper titles and phrases to be used, why shouldn't we..?

What's sauce for the goose is sauce for the gander.

And so I hope you can see the point I'm trying to make here. There is no offence intended to you personally, Catie, but there is a line of thinking that has to be challenged.... chipped away at..... if we are to ever make any progress.

If we don't raise the issue, it will never change.


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@treebee Said

He and David are a bit old to become first time parents. Still, good luck to them. I hope they manage to have a relatively normal experience and dont cop out employing staff to do the mucky stuff.

@Tanglewire Said

I think Eltons a bit old, but Furnish is comparatively a spring chicken. I can imagine the child will be brought up by his staff anyway so I doubt it matters that much.