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Commiting suicide or run away?

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windstorm On June 28, 2012




Birmingham, Alabama
#1New Post! May 28, 2008 @ 19:29:53
For the past two years I have been having severe panic attacks, anxiety and clinical depression. It's been so severe to the point that I have missed school for quite a bit. I am very depressed and angry right now. I want to commit suicide because I'm just sick and tired of this situation. I feel like I'm losing my mind because my thoughts are somewhat scattered and I cannot think clearly.

Okay, I tried talking with my family about this but it makes me sad when all that they say is that I am a spoiled girl. That downright enraged me because when you are depressed, material goods is the last thing on your mind. To be honest, I have never cared anything about material goods. But get this, my brother has recently been struck with diabetes and has had two strokes. All of a sudden my mom comes storming in hounding me that I should call him to "cheer him up" which by the way is what I was doing when she came in.

After I hung up I just started crying because I remember the time when mom was driving me to school and I just opened the car door to jump out and kill myself(with the car traveling at thirty). When I called my siblings, my sister and my mom started fussing at me saying that I was just faking. Why does no one believe me? My heart feels so empty right now because I feel that no one takes my problems seriously, but care for my brother. So in conclusion, I would like to know whether or not I should run away or kill myself to get it over with because I am completely on edge now and I just can't take it anymore and will do "anything" to achieve happiness. I would be grateful for insight.

(Another reason for me being on the forum site is to loosen up and have fun and forget my problems. Last week my mom came and took my
computer away. I didn't mind but then asked her why and she said that the people on this site are not safe and that they could be hackers.)
plebian_angel On April 25, 2012
Intergalactic hussy





a great future,
#2New Post! May 28, 2008 @ 19:32:40
Sweetie, I'm sorry for what you're going thruough. It makes it harder to go thru this when noone believes you. Is there someone you can talk to that you trust?
hyena_bambina On December 30, 2010
Queen Boogity

Moderator




Las Cruces, New Mexico
#3New Post! May 28, 2008 @ 19:34:25
Sounds like you need to seek some counseling... killing yourself would be such a shame, and running away may make your life only worse. It sounds like you need to get to the bottom of why you feel the way you do, I would find an adult you feel comfortable with and try and get help.
johnnyposter On July 03, 2011




my box behind Arbys, Ohio
#4New Post! May 28, 2008 @ 19:38:14
Iv had friends with problems such as yours. Just wait until you're 18 and move away legally, like the rest of us.
plebian_angel On April 25, 2012
Intergalactic hussy





a great future,
#5New Post! May 28, 2008 @ 19:39:44
Don't kill yourself or run away. Please. You have your whole life in front of you. I've been where you are now. Can you go to counseling? Just having someone to unload on helps ALOT.
Lord_DJ On January 13, 2009

Deleted



you really want to know =$,
#6New Post! May 28, 2008 @ 19:40:21
get help!
awildanduntamedthing On July 13, 2012




Wouldn't you like to know?, Un
#7New Post! May 28, 2008 @ 19:40:31
Oh hon, it must be hard having no one believe you. Is there an adult you trust that you can talk to? Please don't commit suicide or run away, neither one is the answer. And know that if you need to talk, you can always come on here, and you can always feel free to send me a PM, though I know you don't really know me.
iliterate_enginere On February 12, 2010

Deleted



Wichita, Kansas
#8New Post! May 28, 2008 @ 19:40:37
Neither of those options will are the right answer. I'm sorry to hear about your situation, but how would that be fair to your brother if you did either of those 2? You need to get some help, like counseling, to sort things out in your life or to at least have someone to vent it out on. There are people out there that do care. You just have to find them, which isn't always easy. You know who you are, not what your mom thinks. Be proud of that, and keep your head up.
windstorm On June 28, 2012




Birmingham, Alabama
#9New Post! May 28, 2008 @ 19:43:06
When I say running away, I don't mean like to a friends house but rather somewhere isolated like a forest where no one will see me. I have plenty of water, food, blankets and money with me right now. As a matter of fact my backpack is packed right now, but my mom doesn't know it

Thanks for the advice everyone, it sure helps by coming on here.
doubtingthomas On April 26, 2010
Jesus is my homie





Monterey, California
#10New Post! May 28, 2008 @ 19:47:05
@windstorm Said
I have missed school for quite a bit. I am very depressed and angry right now. I want to commit suicide because I'm just sick and tired of this situation. I feel like I'm losing my mind because my thoughts are somewhat scattered and I cannot think clearly.




Tell that to your family doctor.

Thats similar to what I did when i had a slump in my life. He didn't judge me, he didn't offer advice, he just gave me 2 percriptions.

1 was for little yellow pills called Zanex, which are a temp. Till the 2nd percription kicks in.

the other was for Paxil, which takes about a month to kick in.

Both of these medications are gods gift to the world. I didn't feel anxous anymore, I didn't feel angry about everything. When I had both of them in full effect, you could crash into my car and I would care but not as much I would previously. I took these meds for about 5 months and eventualy things got better in my life and I stopped.

Think of it like a medical secruity blanket. Everything is just OK and nothing seems like its the end of the world.

I'm not going to try and relate to your problems or give you some lovey dovey everthing will be ok post, because honestly everything might not be ok. But the best advice i can give you is, suicide is a permenate solution to a temparary problem.

People who have tried to end it all by jumping off a bridge say, that the second they jump off that bridge the only real problem in thier lifes is, they just jumped off a bridge.
windstorm On June 28, 2012




Birmingham, Alabama
#11New Post! May 28, 2008 @ 19:49:17
Another thing, I have always been a caring person for most of my life and have always wanted to help people through their situations, but when people belittle your problems, how fair is that? I'm sad because I feel like I'm losing my heart, meaning that I'm getting to the point where I just don't care about anyone anymore. I don't want to become cold-hearted but if this keeps up then I don't see a reason to care, I just don't. Is this the reward for having a caring heart?
lilbear On January 18, 2010
Aequitas / Veritas!


Deleted



, Canada
#12New Post! May 28, 2008 @ 19:49:54
First off you cannot suppress your problems or cover them up. That is a temporary bandage solution.

Suicide is a long term solution to a very short term problem and can never be fixed.

Running away will not make your depression go away.

What you have to do now is get SELFISH, yes selfish. Think about what you need and what you want. Go see someone professional if you don't have any one close that can empathize with you.

You have to take the steps to better yourself and the sooner the better. Doesn't matter if anyone believes you or not. You do know and that's all that counts in the end.

Now, you know exactly how you feel, take the steps necessary to start fixing the problem and start at the roots not on the surface. This may mean that you have to take meds in combo with talk therapy but who cares as long as it's helping you to deal with what you're going through.

So when you get the motivation and stop looking for solutions that will harm you more than help you, then get out there and with complete determination get the right type of help that you need not what you think you need.

Take Care of Yourself, and start caring for yourself, without getting help for yourself how can you be expected to help your brother, you can't. So it's up to you. The best to you and hope all things work out for you.
windstorm On June 28, 2012




Birmingham, Alabama
#13New Post! May 28, 2008 @ 19:51:21
So councilors, phychiatrists and doctors wont send you to the looney bin?
chaski On March 28, 2024
Stalker





Tree at Floydgirrl's Window,
#14New Post! May 28, 2008 @ 19:55:05
I am with lilbear.

Her advise is your starting point.
doubtingthomas On April 26, 2010
Jesus is my homie





Monterey, California
#15New Post! May 28, 2008 @ 20:00:31
@windstorm Said
So councilors, phychiatrists and doctors wont send you to the looney bin?



LOL, no honestly it was like the shortest doctor visit i have ever had.

I walked in there and told the doctor something similar to what you just posted and he said, ok here ya go. And handed me those 2 percriptions.

Easy as that.

I can not emphisize how much those 2 little pills helped me. They let me put everything into perspective. Keep it on the level, when I got anxiuos it seemed like the whole world was attacking me, I couldn't do anything right, there was nothing to live for.

The pills helped me see the big picture. To tell the truth I kinda miss them some times.
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