Arriving home drunk

Flynn staggered home very late after another evening with Paddy. He took off his shoes to avoid waking his wife, Mary. He tiptoed as quietly as he could toward the stairs leading to their upstairs bedroom, but misjudged the bottom step. as he caught himself by grabbing the banister, his body swung around and he landed heavily on his rump. the whisky bottles in each back pocket smashed, making the landing especially painful.

Managing not to yell, Flynn sprung up, pulled down his pants, and looked in the hall mirrow to see his buttocks were cut and bleeding. Quietly , he found a full box of plasters and began sticking them on his cuts the best he could. He then hid the almost empty plaster box and stumbled up to bed.
In the morning, Flynn woke up with a searing pain in his head and backside and Mary staring at him from across the room. she said,"You were drunk again last night weren`t you?"
"What makes you say such a thing?"
"Well, Mary said, it could be the front door left open,the broken glass at the bottom of the stairs, the drops of blood trailing through the house. it could be the bloodshot eyes, but mostly....it`s all those plasters stuck on the hall mirror."