Are you Content?

I was going to title this 'Are you Happy,' but of course, being happy all the time isn't a natural state of being. In fact, being happy 24-7 is an effect of a recognised genetic dissorder. It's an extreme emotion, after all. (Not the same as having a positive outlook, of course, which is quite possible, and indeed, enviable.)

But do you stop and view your take on life? Do you feel as though your feelings shape your life, or that your life, your circumstances and your environment are shaping your mood?

If you do have an idea of how you feel, is it something mostly positive, negative, or indifferent? Are you in touch with those feelings only when you look for them, or are they always pressing at you?

Is it an unrealistic goal to seek to be happy all the time? After years of trying, I have settled for contentment, also garnered from the viewpoint that - compared to many - I have a good life, with no reason to feel sorry for myself. It has made a big difference to me, I feel, to accept contentment.

There is no reason for this post beyond an interest to see just how many people here feel about their life. I would like to know how many people find themselves going through life without even noticing their feelings - is this a good thing? Why *should* we always feel something? Surely just 'getting on with it' is a natural state of being?



Then again, posting in this area might be wrong. Perahps I should be posting in an area where people are not already considering emotion?

I try not to stop and smell the roses when it comes to my life. I'd end up with a whole lot of thorns.
As for you second question, I really think it goes both ways. I'm not a happy person; in fact, I guess I could say I'm a really un-happy person. I don't like myself, andfor the fact that I'm a chicken to do anything about it, I've resorted to tolerating myself, but even that begins to get too much sometimes.
I've been diagnosed with depression, been on anti-depressents (which haven't helped) and I tend to have some rather extreme highs and lows. Well, actually, I have a lot of really extreme lows. I have a neutral ground where I can stand and not want to throw myself off a bridge, but I'm certaintly not content with myself. I don't even know if I would know what that feels like.
I think my circumstances, and all those previously, most definitely do have an effect on my emotions. Unfortantely there isn't really a whole lot I can do to change it, save for putting myself on the streets. Which, at this time year, wouldn't really help matter's much.
I think your family life and your home life do have a lot of say on how you feel. I'm sure if I had some sort of stability things would be easier.



Mostly negative, obviously. Sometimes I have a few days where I'm just me, and although it's not happiness or contentment, it's the close as I'm going to get and that really is my sort of happy ground.
My emotions run rampant and there's sometimes where I'll be on my nuetral ground in the matter of a split second I can be so low that if someone handed me a loaded gun I couldn't promise not to use it.
I haven't exactly figured out my trigger's yet. There's such a variety of things. A family on the television. A dog getting killed. My mother screaming at me. Picking up needles everywhere. Walking down the street and not making myself jump in front of a bus.
Do they press? I'm not so sure. I know that they're always sitting right there, ready to pounce. Escape from them is hardly an option.




I guess on a certain level, I always do feel my...feelings. Although they are extreme and sometimes tend to run rampant and I can't always control them.
I do believe it's a good thing to feel something. Always. But it's certainly healthy to have a good balance of both negative and positive vibes happening in your life. I guess I'm kind of an example as to what happens when you don't.

Is just "getting on with it" natural? I'd tend to think no. When you close yourself down and start by just going through your daily motions is hardly natural. People feel, that's human nature. To turn yourself off completely just to function isn't natural, and certaintly not healthy, in my opinion.

That's why I think we should feel something. To stay human. To have some sort of connection with the world around us to give us reason.
Because without it, it all seems rather pointless.


Neat thread idea, by the way.
Welcome.

I can't imagine going through life without noticing your feelings. Without giving them free reign, yes!
Being in denial about them, to yourselves and others, yes!
But not without noticing them. No way. It's all a matter of perspective. May not be totally happy/content with family, with a relationship, with a job -- but when compared to doing X, Y, or Z (being homeless, jobless or broke) ... things aren't so bad after all.

I broke life. Don't know how I did it but I did.

One moment I feel very warm and affectionate towards everyone and believe that it's all going to work.

The next moment my subcoscience is devouring me and it's like being a single lit match in a huge endless black void.

Twenty five years of my life were spent teaching and working with disturbed kids. Now in practice I do family counseling and substance abuse. Some times people perceive me as being sad because I write some very angsty poety. Heck, without an outlet after watching what I have I would lose my mind. I deal with a chronic illness which can get me down sometimes. It's very easy to get blue (I have an issue with the overuse of the word depression unless it's diagnosed clinical depression). Look at it this way, I have a wonderful family, nice home, some money in the bank, I can care for myself, there are people who truly love me, I've never been arrested, I've been able to be gainfully employed, I can see, hear and love in return. There's more in my life to make me happy than sad, so I try to stay that way. Of course I cry, it's healthy. Pent up emotions just destroy the body and mind. I've buried a child, lost too many loved ones to tragic death. (Old age is sad, but it's more bearable). My son thinks I'm terrific and my husband thinks I'm still cute after 30 plus years. You have to take the good with the bad. My life has been blessed in many ways. The hardest part is always remembering that fact.
That saying."I cried because I had no shoes then I met a man who had no feet." is something I try to remember. Not always successfully when I'm in pain, but all you can do is your best.

Im generally an unhappy person, but that is due to curcomstances i made for myself. I have a million and one things that niggle me daily, 98% of them are only tiny problems, but they all add up. Saying that tho, i do fairly well at hiding it all and just getting on with things. One small problem is i find that i just enjoy being on my own alot now, if i had my way, i wouldnt have any company.

I'm a fairly unhappy person I guess. I've just lost the motivation that I once had and it's difficult to get it back. I know in context to people in Africa or whatever my problems aren't so big, but that doesn't make me care less about my own issues.

I much prefer to be alone than with anyone, socialising has become difficult, it's just too much effort at the moment.

I know things will eventually get better because they f***ing have to, it's just the matter of how long it will take.

I have become in every sense of the word a IRL hermit. There are months when I don't see anyone but my son the and my ole man and thats only a few times a month when it's the busy season for him he's a truck driver, and I find that if I do have to go to town I wait till mid nite and go to the 24/7 super center walmart so I don't have to see or talk to anyone , at that time of night the check out person really doesn't need a alot of people skills. I average one trip to the walmart a month it is a 80 mile round trip I went to the feed store in the little town closest to my place the other day it' only a 30 mile round trip , that was the third time this year I have been to that town. If someone shows up an I'm not feeling sociable I just lock the door and let the the dog bark to his heart content. Other days I'll lock my gate and make it seem like no ones home. I don't notice how much I enjoy being totally alone until someone shows up.

I'm not unhappy, but I'm not happy either. Usually, I seem to be waiting for something to happen and then I respond to it one way or the other. While I'm not content, I'm not willing to do anything about it, either.

Being content doesn't necessarily mean being happy. Some folks are unhappy, but are content that they have done all that they could.
I am happy, but never content, because I know that there are still ways in which I can better myself, and make life better for my family.
To be content is to be static. To be content is not having any challenges. Where is the joy in that?

I'm alright Jack!

I think we are looking at the word from slightly different angles. You are ascribing a number of negative attributes to what I have sought to use as a term for emotional neutrality. The contentment I spoke of was merely an absense of the extreme emotional highs and lows, and not nessesarily part of a mindset.

In relation to the example of folks being unhappy but accepting life, I feel that something like 'resigned' would be more appropriate.

No, being content isn't being happy, but being happy all the time is not a fesable agenda. Those who study emotion say we are greatly neutral with bouts of 'feeling,' but I wont go there - that's a whole new ballgame.

But it could be I used the wrong word. If you replace 'content' with something appropriate to signal an absence not of drive, ambition or want, but merely of an expressable or recognisable emotion, then please assume that it is really what I meant to say in the first post.

I said I'm mostly content but have a positive outlook.

I have a positive outlook because I absolutely refuse to have a negative one. If I want to do something, I make sure I'm going to do it.

My only problem is that I think too much; about if I'm good enough to do what I set out to do or indeed if what I'm setting out to do is really what I want to do.

I guess I'm confusing. My whole family has been succesful so far; I want to make sure I am too and as such I'm guaging my potential success on how much I can do, or really, on how much I actually want to do. Motivation has somewhat gone out of the window since losing my last job.

Good post though, mate.

A big thanks to all who have contributed. It's a highly personal set of questions, and I admire - and indeed, envy - your your forthrightness in posting a part of how you are and how you feel. It's been difficult not to respond to each and every post, as they are all fascinating and worthy of inquiry - but thanks. It's always fascinating to pool our rescorces as a human collective and see where we're at and just who we are.

Booty bump, i shall have to come back to this thread when I have the time.