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50 Ways To Leave Your Lover

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HiImDan On February 29, 2024




Cleveland, the boil on the but
#1New Post! May 23, 2010 @ 13:32:34
I hate to call Paul Simon a fraud, but this has been bothering me for years now: His song ?50 Ways To Leave Your Lover? only includes FIVE actual ways to leave your lover (see 1-5 below). I thought I?d help him out by coming up with the other 45 myself. So why don't you just sleep on it tonight, and in the morning you'll begin to see the light


1. Just slip out the back, Jack

2. Make a new plan, Stan

3. You don?t need to be coy, Roy

4. Hop on the bus, Gus

5. Just drop off the key, Lee
***************************************
6. Threaten to sue, Lou

7. Pack up and go, Joe

8. Blame it on the gin, Finn

9. Move to Japan, Stan

10. Get a new job, Bob

11. Call her a hick, Rick

12. Move to Boston, Austin

13. Pack up and dash, Nash

14. Get a new bride, Clyde

15. Fly to the moon, June

16. Dive in the sea, Dee

17. Spray her with Mace, Grace

18. Work late and cheat, Pete

19. Say she?s a slob, Rob

20. Tell her she?s screwed, Jude

21. Might have to draw blood, Judd

22. Get in a van, Dan

23. Pack while she?s gone, Ron

24. Leave her at the table, Mable

25. Say it?s not you it?s me, Lee

26. There?s always Brazil, Will

27. Walk out the front gate, Kate

28. Wear a big floppy hat, Pat

29. Run as fast as you dare, Claire

30. Tell it to her straight, Nate

31. Throw your clothes in the lawn, John

32. Rent a new flat, Matt

33. Sneak off to the bar, Mar

34. Feed her to a shark, Mark

35. Hop on a plane, Jane

36. Make her sick, Nick

37. Find a new man, Ann

38. Leave on a whim, Jim

39. Blame it on him, Em

40. Run off with the maid, Jade

41. How far can you swim, Kim?

42. Just take him out, Scout

43. Post it online, Cline

44. Make a big scene, Gene

45. Walk away slow, Flo

46. Try your hand at showbiz, Liz

47. Change the locks, Nox

48. Write it on the wall, Paul

49. Sail off on a yacht, Scott

50. Don?t ever look back, Mac
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