The Forum Site - Join the conversation
Forums:
Jokes & Humor

10 Reasons why Johnny Cash owns Chuck Norris

Reply to Topic
AuthorMessage
el_diablo On December 19, 2008

Deleted



Maui, Hawaii
#1New Post! Sep 07, 2006 @ 16:36:18
Reason 1.
Only one man who has ever lived has been bad enough to be called ?The Man In Black? and it wasn?t Chuck Norris

Reason 2.
Johnny didn?t have to fight to be a bad ass. He just had to pick up a beer bottle and a guitar.

Reason 3.
Norris made a bunch of films where he killed folks. Johnny Cash went to Folsom Prison and did a concert. You tell me which one takes more balls.

Reason 4.
Chuck wasn?t the first of his kind to kick ass. Johnny was the first rock star to set something on fire. While most artists only set their hotel rooms on fire, Johnny took it one step further and burned down half a national forest.

Reason 5.
When Chuck was five, he was a normal five year old. Johnny had already earned man points by working in his dad?s cotton fields. That is a true bad ass. By the time he was six, Cash did more hard work than most men do in their whole life.

Reason 6.
Chuck never got stabbed in the back by a woman. Johnny never stopped bleeding. Chuck may have gotten punched a few times, but Johnny knew what real pain was.

Reason 7.
Chuck is a republican. Johnny was close with every president except for GWB. It was said he just didn?t trust that son of a b****. When Johnny didn?t trust someone, you just knew something foul was going on.

Reason 8.
Johnny was invited to play the at White House in 1972 for Richard Nixon. He was given a list of politically correct songs to sing. He instead metaphorically threw up his middle finger at the establishment, in true ShoutWire fashion, and sang a set full of left leaning, politically charged tunes. Chuck Norris has never told the president to f*** off in his own house.

Reason 9.
Chuck Norris made a lot of crappy movies. Johnny Cash never touched anything that didn?t turn to gold. In the 80?s, he made a song called ?Chicken in Black? to get himself out of a record deal. Even that became popular.

Reason 10.
Johnny is the only man in history to decline painkillers after a double bypass heart surgery. He knew he liked drugs too gosh darn much and wouldn?t stop. That shows power over an addiction previously not seen before. Kicking a ninja's a** is easy compared to kicking a drug's ass.
jwasafrog On September 18, 2010




, California
#2New Post! Sep 07, 2006 @ 16:44:22
treebee On April 13, 2015
Government Hooker

Moderator




London, United Kingdom
#3New Post! Sep 07, 2006 @ 16:45:41
i wanna hear the chicken in black song!
brainfarmer On February 09, 2007




huddersfield, United Kingdom
#4New Post! Sep 07, 2006 @ 16:47:24
johnny cash was so cool we will never see his like again
elmo On March 12, 2007

Deleted



Horsham, United Kingdom
#5New Post! Sep 07, 2006 @ 16:48:02
Yep... ok u just ruined Chuck norris....

cos its true...
jonnythan On August 02, 2014
Bringer of rad mirth


Deleted



Here and there,
#6New Post! Sep 07, 2006 @ 16:49:59
If Johnny Cash were homosexual, his name would be Chuck Norris.
brainfarmer On February 09, 2007




huddersfield, United Kingdom
#7New Post! Sep 07, 2006 @ 16:56:29
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1zgja26eNeY
johnny cash at st quenten
el_diablo On December 19, 2008

Deleted



Maui, Hawaii
#8New Post! Sep 07, 2006 @ 17:04:13
@jonnythan Said
If Johnny Cash were homosexual, his name would be Chuck Norris.


I recall hearing the same thing about Jack Bauer.
jonnythan On August 02, 2014
Bringer of rad mirth


Deleted



Here and there,
#9New Post! Sep 07, 2006 @ 17:06:14
@el_diablo Said
I recall hearing the same thing about Jack Bauer.

Yeah?

Funny that
squirt_aka_casey On April 21, 2018
BCW-Ant Destroyer





That place, Ohio
#10New Post! Sep 07, 2006 @ 17:59:25
I like neigther, but I like Cash more, I suppose, I dunno, I just don't like eigther. Go ahead and yell at me!
wristband On July 19, 2009




Emerald City,
#11New Post! Sep 11, 2006 @ 20:08:11
@jonnythan Said
If Johnny Cash were homosexual, his name would be Chuck Norris.


That's hilarious.
Reply to Topic<< Previous Topic | Next Topic >>

1 browsing (0 members - 1 guest)

Quick Reply
Be Respectful of Others

      
Subscribe to topic prefs

Similar Topics
    Forum Topic Last Post Replies Views
New posts   Country
Thu Jul 25, 2013 @ 10:49
17 5003
New posts   Music
Sat Feb 27, 2010 @ 12:03
8 991
New posts   Jokes & Humor
Sun Apr 18, 2010 @ 19:08
32 1906
New posts   Country
Wed Aug 15, 2007 @ 16:19
7 2089
New posts   Random
Tue Jan 24, 2006 @ 07:58
36 1355