I Might Be Quite ill

@Erimitus Said

I picture CBT as a cross between Coockoo's nest and Clockwork orange.

What is the name of the book. I will see if I can find it.

@cole Said

click the link in the previous post, it takes you right to it on Amazon. I'm not usually one for all that self-help crap but i was willing to give it a bash in the sphere of the clinical trial. Some of it was of course bulls***, but there were little nuggets that were helpful.

@cole Said

Yes, your points are well taken. I am however very familiar with grief. I didn’t go to my first funeral till I was 19 and then had 1 five years in a row.

I also understand that I am grieving however this isn’t the basis for my earlier post about going on my own terms. It is that I’d merely want to go on my own terms when I’m ready. When the kids are raised and living happy, well adjusted lives.

Don’t worry, I’m not suicidal, again too much to live for. My grief is manageable, I know what needs to be done and I’ve taken steps to deal with it in a healthy way. It will run its course and life moves on. I’m very much an “it is what it is” kinda guy and I know that it’s going to be ok.

But in keeping with the thread and apologies for taking it of course I think I too would at a certain time just live in ignorance than seek medical intervention.

@puzZles Said

My head was in another place too, the day I replied to you the way I did and that's why I read what you had to say the way I did.

I get it now. You are not feeling suicidal but if something (life threatening) might be going on inside you that you weren't certain of, you'd (at least at that point in life) rather not know anything for certain but just let what may happen, simply take it's course?

If that's what you mean I get that. I think I feel that way too. (however, I don't have kids so... I Might. feel differently in such case...but I'll never know that for sure...Plus if I didn't know anything for certain there'd be nothing to feel guilty about. lol

@cole Said

Yes, you get it. I wasn't talking about going out in the dead of night with a rope looking for a tree. Not my style, nor do I willingly want my life to end. However if it is a trade between extending or quality of time left or i'm in my 60s/70s and end up ill/sick then I don't think i'd bother getting it seen to.

That being said I do have kids, I have a grandchild and will hopefully one day get many more so I don't know how I'd feel then.