is it abuse?

@fallenangel Said
I am planning to leave after christmas...It's really scary though. I know I have to leave if not for me then for my baby. I'm leaving it untill after christmas because I need time to get my nerve and it will be easier because it gives me time to plan as well.

@fallenangel Said
but sometimes I do antagonise him.

@redglitter Said
Wow, your excuses are classic. Let me break this down for you and I'm going to be perfectly straightforward about it. One woman to another:




He does call me stupid and other names but that's just because he is upset about me being pregnant and he needs to let it out.

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Bulls***. Don't make another excuse for this behavior. He's upset about you being pregnant? Did he make you that way? Or did you get pregnant by yourself. What, he didn't feel like wearing a rubber so it's all your fault that you're pregnant? Please. He calls you stupid because he does not respect you. YOU the mother of his child. If you continue to put up with this, he won't stop at stupid, I guarantee it.

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I did listen to everyone before and I tried to leave and when it came down to it I couldn't because I do love him.

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How can you love someone who treats you so poorly? And how about respect? Surely you can't tell me you have respect for him when he treats you like garbage. Without mutual respect, you have nothing.

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He said he was sorry and it would kill him if I ever left so he does love me.

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This is proof of his love for you? You're kidding yourself. You don't really know what love is, do you? This guy doesn't love you. He can't even love himself or else he would act like a man. Women who are battered and emotionally broken down always say "He didn't mean it. He just hits me because I make him mad." He doesn't want you to leave because he likes to control you. It makes him feel good to abuse you. This is sick.

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Pepople say it's abuse but they can't see why he does the things he does...he doesn't do it on purpose. But I really am confused and can't see straight.


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Then let me help clear your vision: People tell you it's abuse because they can see what you so obviously don't want to. They're giving you the heads-up. Take it and run. You have a baby on the way and you're going to bring it into this situation? What happens when he beats the baby? If it's a girl you can bet she'll suffer the same garbage you are now. Is this what you want for your child? For it to grow up watching its mother be torn down? You are making excuses for this guy's actions and it's wrong. All the things you've said are classic examples of abuse and your excuses are classic denial. I'll tell you the truth. He's not going to change, not now and not when the baby comes. He has big problems that you can't fix. If you are a smart girl, you will leave him. I don't care if you are pregnant, leave him. Get a backbone and some self-respect and don't let anyone ever treat you like this again. Never!

I'll tell you something else: You already know how he treats you is wrong or you wouldn't be asking for help about it. Getthe heck out of this "relationship" while you still can and make a good life for yourself and your baby.

I may sound harsh but that's because I know what I'm talking about and because I'm angry that in this day and age, a young girl like you can actually think she deserves to be treated like sh*t. Get out of it while you can. You owe him nothing. You owe yourself and your baby everything.

Red Glitter

@fallenangel Said
Ok...I just want to update you all because I havn't been on for a while and I need to explain why. A few nights ago My boyfriend punched me...I told him that I wasn't putting up with him and I left. I am now living back with my dad and I have deleted his number out of my phone. It hurt like hell...but It wouldn't have hurt as much as if I had of stayed...thank you everyone for giving me the strength I needed to get out.