My Friends brother wrote this a few years ago, it has been read out many times at different christmas lunches thought you all might like to read and relate to it to
On the first day of Christmas my true love said to me,
I?m glad we bought fresh turkey and a real Christmas tree
On the second day of Christmas, much laughter could be heard
As we tucked into our turkey a most delicious bird
On the third day we entertained the people from next door
The turkey tasted just as good as it had the day before
Day four, relations came to stay poor Gran is looking old
We finished up the Christmas pud, and ate the turkey cold
On the fifth day of Christmas, outside the snowflakes flurried
But we were nice and warm inside and we ate the turkey curried
On the sixth day, I must admit, the Christmas spirit died
The children fought and bickered ? we ate turkey rissoles ?Fried
On the seventh day of Christmas, my true love he did wince
When he sat down at the table and was offered turkey mince
Day eight, and nerves were getting frayed, The dog had run for shelter
I served up turkey pancakes with a glass of Alka ? Seltza
On day nine our cat left home ? by lunchtime dad was blotto
He said he had to have a drink to face turkey risotto
By the tenth day, the booze had gone (except our home made brew)
And as if that wasn?t bad enough we suffered turkey stew
On the eleventh day of Christmas, the Christmas tree was moulting
The mince pies were as hard as rock and the turkey was revolting
On the Twelfth day, my true love had a smile upon his face
The guests had gone - The Turkey too ? and we dined on fish and chips