"Mom" discrimination at work

i thought i was the only "non" mom to feel this way at work. but i guess i'm not. Most of the women where i work at are Moms or Moms to be. Those of us, who have chosen to be single, or decided not to have children seem have become the minority.

Whenever "we" put in for vacation, it has to be "approved", or i have to check on the days to see if other "can swap" with me.

But when a "mother" wants to take time off, be with the family, there's no question - and of course, "we" have to not only hold down the fort, but do so for the vacationer.

Whenever i sit down with a "mom" the first question if she doesn't know me is: "Do you have any kids?"

If you don't, and you talk about motorcycles, sky diving, hiking,different cultures, geographics, geology, quantum physics, skiing iceskating, great books, documentaries, current events, famous poets, amazing chemists, new discoveries, Health and fitness - well, her eye glaze over.

if they are in a group: don't bring up any of those subjects, or they will give you the "group eye-glaze".

It's okay if you talk about guys. that's partially acceptable. And if any of the moms has a son - guess where the conversation goes back to.


When i'm at the gym, i see that "stare" when a well-kept female walks in and turns heads. and i hear this a lot: "i bet she's never been pregnant."

Or when a woman is in power, and doesn't play politics: "Somebody needs to get her pregnant - that'll slow her down." I'm not kidding, i've heard this amongst women.

Lastly, i was told, "You're not a 'real woman' until you've given birth.

I have a litter of racoons that live around our house. Yep, the mother gave birth. That doesn't make her a 'real racoon'. Any mammal can lay down and have offspring. But does it make her less than because they've decided to take a route of education, or other pursuits?

Haha. Another reason I don't have alot of women friends. It's like as soon as MOST, not all, women become moms they become obsesssed with their kids, including forgetting to treat their hubby like a man, and wonder why the relationship fails.
But back to work 'mom's. I dont' have problem getting time off, as it's based on seniority. And if they use too much sick time to be out with their kids being sick or whatever, they have to use their vacation time.
So it really doesn't bother me that way.

thats terrible behaviour form your work. just cos you choose not to have kids doesnt mean you have to take second place. its just that a lot of laws protect parents at work from seedy employers. i have problems at the moment cos i am a mum and i keep getting shifts i cant do cos there will be no one for the kids. but on the same note, what does it have to do with anyone if you have kids or not?? does it make you different?? i hste sitting with mums cos all they talk about is schools and kids and stuff. i am not just a mum, i am a person. i like to do toher things and have other interests as well

I know here in the states, it's illegal to ask about marital status and if you have any kids in job interviews.
The problems arise after someone is hired and you realize they are out every other day cuz of their kids

its illegal to ask those questions in the uk as well

I didnt realize this happened, at the end of the day though, it sounds to me like theyre jealous lol!
A lot of women use the giving birth thing as an excuse to get fat (sorry girls, seen it all before).
My mother never put on weight or lost her great figure.
Im with you on this one girl, i say rub it in their face as much as you can.

Oh, I'm with you! Mom's get more "sick" days than non moms. I work with moms who talk about their kids all day.

I honestly don't need to know about a baby's poopy diaper before a meeting. Though, I think some people do. Why, I'm not sure. (yes that has happened to me).

And then you have the ones that treat you like you are a leper because you don't have kids or aren't wanting kids. I usually tell them some people shouldn't have kids and I think I'm one of those people. That usually gets them to leave me alone.

Ohhhh and the other thing...when they bring their kids to work. And expect everyone to fawn over them. I'm sorry, but I have better things to do than tell you your kid is cute. Especially when it's wailing at the top of it's lungs.

I can't stand women that just talk about babies and stuff all the time, that's why my eyes glaze over and I switch off.

This is really great to hear...im sick of hearing women talking about kids as well...especially when one of those fat single junkie mothers brings her chimp on the bus and all the oldies start doing that silly little 'baby smile' looking over at the child and waving etc...God its pathetic!
I feel like going over to the mother and saying
"My what an ugly child!" Because most of the time it DOES look like the fat spotty mother and IS ugly!

Oh it was good to get that out.

you guys are nuts! but thanks for understanding. I'm in the medical field, and because we have high turnover, it's harder on those of us who are single and more flexible, shift-wise.

We just hired a woman, who said she couldn't work everyday because she had to work elsewhere. No problem.

But then when on the days she was to show up, she'd call in sick. 3x a week out of 4. At first, they were ready to just call in a temp tech and "let her go". She "came forth" and said "I have to be honest, i'm a mother." she didn't have a" job elsewhere". Though she lied - All was well. She's still not showing up, but now it's okay.

Maybe i should do the same thing, "come forth" and say: "I have a crack habit". That'll go over really well. 8)

i'm with you there, beaucroft.

Here, in the bay area, i've noticed that "EVERYONE ELSE" has to look both ways before crossing the streets? Not moms with strollers! i can't tell you how many times, folks have to brake - hard, because Mom just shoves that carriage out there in front of her into the traffic - and expects EVERYONE to stop on a dime. Even if she's crossing on a red light.

or if i'm reading (what a concept), and they're bored while waiting for an appt. they come sit next to you with their baby, and try making conversation. "Do you have any kids?" then here comes the "eye glaze".

Sometimes, i think most women have them out of boredom or desperation - they can sense when their husband is bored with them. (The "other woman" types at the gym hear this a lot). When i was single, and was hit on by guys who had kids, i heard this as well.

What's worse, i hear the husbands complain about the kids (how they really didn't want them to begin with). Or how the wife "let herself go", and they come to the gym or strip clubs to "get an eyeful". What's THAT about?

And lets not forget the ones with the triple buggys that ram into everyone when theyre out shopping.