The ugly wife

@rondetto Said

A guy lands a new job, and his boss offers him a deal...
"If you marry my daughter, I'll make you a partner, give you an expense account, a Mercedes, and a million-dollar salary."
Curious, the guy asks, "What's wrong with her?"
The boss shows him a photo, and she's extremely unattractive...
The boss adds, "Not just ugly, she's also as dumb as a rock."
The guy replies, "No thanks, no matter what you offer."
The boss ups the ante, "How about a five-million-dollar salary and a mansion on Long Island?"
The guy thinks it over and decides to accept, figuring he can always put a bag over her head when he sleeps with her.
A year later, he's hanging an original Van Gogh painting that he bought with his newly acquired wealth...
Climbing a ladder, he calls to his wife, "Bring me a hammer."
She mutters, "Get the hammer, get the hammer," and fetches a hammer.
Next, he says, "Get me some nails."
She mumbles, "Get the nails, get the nails," and brings him some nails.
After realizing the nail won't hold the painting, he calls out, "I think I'll need a screw."
His wife mutters...
"Get the bag, get the bag."