More Funnies

@rondetto Said

Bill: Where did you get that gold watch Joe?
Joe: I won it in a race.
Bill: How many people participated in it?
Joe: Three, a policeman, the owner of the watch, and me!
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“A man walks into a pharmacy and says, ‘Can I have a bar of soap, please?’
The pharmacist says, ‘Do you want it scented?’
The man says, ‘No, I’ll take it with me now.'”
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I was having dinner with a world chess champion and there was a check tablecloth.
It took them two hours to pass the salt.
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I Jumped the queue at the pub.
Well it was called the Barge Inn …
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I’ve bought a new satnav and it’s really good.
Yesterday I drove past a zoo and it said "bear left".
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I went out with a Mexican girl once. Trouble was, she only had a single tooth in her mouth.
Her name was one eater!
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Just asked the vicar if he’d heard that the local campanologist society was closing
but he said it didn’t ring a bell!
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