Etiquette from the Wedding Guest's Perspective

My date and I were recently invited to a friend's "post-wedding" reception. Basically they had an official reception for family and close friends, then the ceremony, then the honeymoon, then this reception for other friends.

Hundreds of sites give etiquette advice for the bride and groom when it comes to how to act towards guests, but none of them seem to give advice from the guest's perspective. I have a few questions:

1) Since I wasn't invited to the wedding or the official reception, how expensive should the gift be? He is a fairly good friend, but I am a single 27 year old guy. Is $25 acceptable or is the $50 minimum still appropriate?
2) I want to send them a thank you note for inviting us to the reception, but my handwriting is terrible. Is a personalized, typed note in a beautiful scripty font on card paper with a hand-written signature appropriate?

Any advice would be appreciated.

1) I've never heard of a $50 minimum. Was that imposed by the bridal couple or just etiquette?
I would think that a $25 gift is perfectly acceptable. Hopefully for them, the reception is not about the gifts, but about celebrating with friends.

2) I've also never heard of sending a thank you note for an invitation. Since you feel inclined to do so, I would think that a typed one (as long as you sign it personally) would be fine. They'd probably be touched that you thought to thank them formally, since they're the ones expected to do all the thank you's for gifts and (possibly) attendance.


I think when you're looking at what a wedding guest should do, you have to look from the bridal couple's perspective (because all that advice you're seeing is actually from the guests perspective, looking at the bridal couple).

If I were the bride and planned an extra reception to celebrate with just friends, it would be much more informal and focused on celebration. Probably a good time for a non-traditional gift...who wants a crystal punchbowl from their friends?

So basically...try to see it from your friend's perspective. You're probably over thinking it.

There is no minimum price for gifts. Give what you can afford.

I think giving the couple a gift is thanks enough for the invite. I don't think there is any need to send them a thank you note. You can write in the card you give them a quick thank you and that should be fine. You can type that up with no problem. Just sign your name instead of typing that.

Just show up with a half-gallon of whiskey.

Don't give them nothing, then see how acceptable it it.
(I never heard of a $50.00 minimum before )

of course, the bride sleep with me, to thank me, before the wedding or after.

i was brought up, i was told that you should give the wedding couple in an envelope money. you sign up to register in a catolog, and then that paid for a wedding gift. you can send " thank you note " to them, before or after, they send you, a thank you note.

it is not a good etiquette: to give the bride, a muzzle for a wedding gift!