And there's more

@rondetto Said

I went to the zoo yesterday and in a cage I saw a baguette sitting there.

Talking to the keeper and he told me that it was bread in captivity.


So I said to the Queen “Why have you got an oxygen cylinder under your chair?” She said “That’s the air to the throne”


When I was young, I didn't believe I would ever get old. Then I hit 50 and everything clicked


Just sold my painting of a police sergeant for a small fortune.
They must have thought it was a constable.


I see Emmerdale and Corrie will be stopping soon ........
First no Toilet Paper now No Soap


Got this leaflet through the door today. It said "if you are an alcoholic,call this number"
so i did.
It was a bloody off licence.


Today I saw a dwarf climbing down a prison wall. I thought “That's a little con descending”.