The Grudge Thread

A voluntary aspect of conflict is the tendency to harbor grudges against people. I for one have picked it up recently, as part of my immersion in conflict. I would like to share with all of you my stories of people that I still begrudge because of how inconsiderately they treated me. In return, I would like you to share with me any grudge that you currently hold. If you don't wish to, I will understand perfectly and not persue the matter any further.

I will begin with a guy named Mark Walsh, who I met while i was doing a National Diploma Course in Animal Care at Capel Manor College. One day, during our rounds to clean the animal cages. We paused for a moment in front of the cricket cage to inspect it. I made a joke about crickets, in which I wondered aloud if the sport of cricket and the insect cricket shared any common routes.

Mark said, 'Shut up, Paul.'

I said. 'Mark, I was only wondering.'

Mark made an emphatic gesture with his hand and said, 'Paul, I do not know.'

This guy told me to shut up again after I complimented him on his ability to mimicry a goat. I told him I was only offering him a compliment and he raised his hands and nodded in mock surrender.

Last, but certainly not least, I was with him and group of friends and I complimented him on his painting from the previous week. He gave me a look of annoyance and indifference and he said,

'Paul, does it really matter?'

I had these rather awkward experiences sixteen years ago and I still remmeber what this idiot said to me. I can still see the looks on his face, on each occasion. If I were to ever meet him again, I'd remind him of how inadequeately he had treated me, because there are ways of talking to people that we do not use.

I have not seen him since I left Capel Manor, but I will never forget what he did to me, as a point of reference, to make sure I am weary around the likes of him, if I ever come accross them, again.