"If you're reading this get back to work!"  HiImDan
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Cleveland, the boil on the but
Joined: Dec 2007 |
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A bunch of crap that's on my mind
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I beat my own record, 80 push ups, my old record was 71!  | |
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My ex she beast was just a tad on the dumb side. One day she called me up to brag about the Energizer Bunnies proof of purchases she saved for me. I cruised over to her place and she didn't save the Energizer proof of purchases but the rabbit ears.  | |
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| At work for Cleveland's Gund Arena working security when I noticed the men's room was marked as being "Broken". I asked on of the maintenance men if this was a mistake. The dude shrugged his shoulders rolled his eyes and says "If you don't mind I'm TRYING to clean it!" I said "Congratulations, you've found your niche! Get really used to them toilets!" :D | |
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| Got hit with a chemical imbalance and have been surviving for 2 weeks. I'll keep you posted.... | |
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Nicole, won $4 K on Wheel Of Fortune while my wife-Xiou, won $2 K on Jeopardy! glad I married them  | |
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| I guess I'm permanently banned from face book cuz I used the word "gun" | |
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They gots these little characters with a ruler and usually read "you must be this tall to ride this"? Well I think my bank has a similar sign which reads "your IQ cannot exceed double digits to work here". Today was no different, I walked in and evidently stood in the wrong line was immediately rebuked for standing in the wrong one, I apologized and explained the I was legally blind. Next, she snapped "is this for Key plus?" To which I said "I have no idea what that is" She barks "what do you want?" I showed her my coin roll and said "I want to cash these in" "WHAT??" (oh, boy, this is a rocket scientist) "Can I get cash for these?" "that's it?" "Um...yeah." "Well you should have said so" This woman looked a tad familiar, I wonder if she's the same one who, when I tried to cash some change before found a dime in with a penny roll, hands it to me, I gave her a penny and she says "you'll need 9 more, sir" I asked her "are you sure working at a banks a good investment?" At least her coworkers got a good laugh at her.  | |
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Why does Ozzy always ask this stupid question?
"Are you ready to rock 'n roll?" um....that would explain the 20,000 people chanting your name. Why doncha read to us... | |
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Then there was a time, when I lived in an apartment, that my neighbor and I each had a little goose. One day, I decided to give my goose a little caption that read “you’re giving goose bumps baby!” My neighbor wrote “wow!” Then I put a sign which read “Hey, baby, take a gander at me!” And he wrote “You ain’t seen nothing yet!” When I moved out, I put a bunch of Easter eggs with her.  | |
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| Julie, won $1 K on Jeopardy! last year & my wife-Rebecca, won $67 K on Wheel Of Fortune tonight and my wife-Danielle, won $1 K on Jeopardy! tonight, glad I married them <3 | |
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Oh, my goose...!
