"Raisin Bran<3"  xoxbrandyxox
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Über-Meister
1652 points
20/F/, Florida
Join Date: Jun 2006 |
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Okay. So, there's this guy. I've known him for almost 3 years. A year after I met him I kind of... fell in love with him  . Before I get into my story, heres why I fell in love with him.
Ok on January 13, 2004 the worst thing in my life happened. My dad died. Me being 15, I thought I would never be happy after that again. That I would just pretty much live until I died. I was still in my old High School, which I hated. After my dad died, I stopped going to school, I hated it and it was too overwhelming to be majorly depressed in a place you can't stand. So i left school, the rest of the year I was homeschooled. Then the next school year starts in September '04. Thats when I meet him. At first I didnt like him all that much, he was just a stupid guy to me then. That year we go to being good friends, we hung out sometimes, went to the mall, went bowling, played pool, and went skating. He helped me out with all my problems and my boyfriends. That school year ended, then the next year is when it all hit me. I fell in love with the kid, and you want to know why? Because he was the only guy & person in general to make me genuinely happy after my dad had died. I told him I was in love with him. He didnt feel the same, i was expecting that so it didnt really bother me. He told me that he wasnt going to date another girl until i "fell out of love" with him, cause he didnt want to hurt me. So me, wanting him to get on with his life, i told him i didnt love him anymore eventually, but he knows ill always like him.
NOW. eventually, i did get over him. But the other night err, more like Monday morning (12 AM) me and my cousin hung out with him and his best friend. While my cousin and his friend went to 7/11 me and him kinda started making out and s**t. Now i pretty much hate myself for it. I dont know what to do, but when i was kissing him i felt all these feelings rush back, and i dont wanna fall in love with him again, unless its actually gonna go somewhere this time. He explained to me why me and him never dated, and i understand his reasons completely. But he doesnt have that reason anymore (we talked about it). It doesnt help i live 45 minutes away from him right now though.
What do i do to keep myself from falling in love with him all over again and keep me from getting my heartbroken. I cant just stop talking to him, hes one of the best people i know and i dont wanna lose that.
....& if youre wondering the reason why we never dated. He said it was because at the time he was still living with his ex fiance and he could only see himself being tied down to her. Which is why none of his other relationships never worked out.
Now I know youre thinking, 'hes probably just saying that.' or 'hes probably a jerk and just doesnt want to make her feel bad' please dont say that. you dont know him the way i know him. and again, i understand his reasons of why we never dated perfectly, cause ive had reasons to why i never dated people too.
Just help me. What do i do?
& if you read all that, thanks for caring?.  | |
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