""As Country As Cornflakes""  WildChild
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Perv Magnet
Über-Moderator
100756 points
38/F/Southern Middle, Tennessee
Join Date: Dec 2005 |
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loveis
Monk
36039 points | You should let her know it..just not in front of her daughter..you don't want to drive any wedges between the two of you.
..The mother sounds like she's right jealous.    lmao: |
Lili
Monk
35448 points | Having lived with an alcoholic mother, I can totally understand the desire to scream profanities, and I have several times, but in the end, it does no good. It's the alcohol talking that makes her say stupid crap like that, and alcohol doesn't listen. She'd need to be sober before she'd be able to hear anything you had to say. Starting a fight with her in that state is only bringing you down, and is just another day in the life of being an alcoholic for her. Depending on how drunk she is, she might not even remember the encounter. It doesn't even make you feel better from a venting perspective because it's about as effective as screaming at a brick wall. Seriously, it's not worth it.
I remember being 17 and dealing with my mom's insanity, and the best thing you can do for your step daughter is to be a source of emotional security, stability and comfort. That means not pulling yourself into the fray, because that makes you a part of it, and she'll no where to turn for relief. |
WildChild
Perv Magnet
Über-Moderator
100756 points | lili said:
Having lived with an alcoholic mother, I can totally understand the desire to scream profanities, and I have several times, but in the end, it does no good. It's the alcohol talking that makes her say stupid crap like that, and alcohol doesn't listen. She'd need to be sober before she'd be able to hear anything you had to say. Starting a fight with her in that state is only bringing you down, and is just another day in the life of being an alcoholic for her. Depending on how drunk she is, she might not even remember the encounter. It doesn't even make you feel better from a venting perspective because it's about as effective as screaming at a brick wall. Seriously, it's not worth it.
Yeah I know you're right and as long as I can I will hold my cool but I'm not the type to take crap sitting down. I will not lower myself in the eyes of her chidren or mine but her time will come and she will have to eat those words. |
angelcake
Points Whore Master
62071 points | oh hun i know the feeling really I do.
Greg's ex hated me for ages, because greg was happy and she wasn't and she called me every name under the sun! Thankfully she never took it out on courtney, but courtney was only 3 at the time. |
loveis
Monk
36039 points | lili said:
Having lived with an alcoholic mother, I can totally understand the desire to scream profanities, and I have several times, but in the end, it does no good. It's the alcohol talking that makes her say stupid crap like that, and alcohol doesn't listen. She'd need to be sober before she'd be able to hear anything you had to say. Starting a fight with her in that state is only bringing you down, and is just another day in the life of being an alcoholic for her. Depending on how drunk she is, she might not even remember the encounter. It doesn't even make you feel better from a venting perspective because it's about as effective as screaming at a brick wall. Seriously, it's not worth it.
I remember being 17 and dealing with my mom's insanity, and the best thing you can do for your step daughter is to be a source of emotional security, stability and comfort. That means not pulling yourself into the fray, because that makes you a part of it, and she'll no where to turn for relief.
These are good points you make..
I guess I didn't quite think this one through.. |
WildChild
Perv Magnet
Über-Moderator
100756 points | loveis said:
These are good points you make..
I guess I didn't quite think this one through..
It's ok , my first thought was to bitch slap her too but I know why she's acting like this. She just can't realize that she's the one who f**ked things up and they were divorced for a while before I came into the picture. I did not break up her marriage she did. |
loveis
Monk
36039 points | wildchild said:
It's ok , my first thought was to bitch slap her too but I know why she's acting like this. She just can't realize that she's the one who f**ked things up and they were divorced for a while before I came into the picture. I did not break up her marriage she did.
I think she does know it was her own fault, and that is why she hates and is so jealous of you all the more..
but better to just ignore her..the other poster is right, leave the daughter feeling secure in having you to turn to no matter what. |
drummerwannabe
Minister
10559 points | aww hun..
That really sucks.. I can't believe someone would treat their daughter like that.. 
I hope everything works out ok
and don't you be going to jail.. I can't bail you out from all the way up here in Minnesota. |
WildChild
Perv Magnet
Über-Moderator
100756 points |
Thanks !
I think Ted and I handled this very well lastnight. When he got home from work we sat down with his daughter and we explained to her that her mother was scorned and that she really did'nt mean to take her ill feelings against me out on her. We really wanted her to understand that the anger her mother felt was not aimed at her it was aimed at herself as well as me.
His ex called over ten times lastnight trying to get a reaction out of me . Ted just answered the phone and talked to her very calmly , that pissed her off more than anything else. This will pa** I'm sure.
Next week I'm taking his daughter to pick out everything she needs for the formal . She will not suffer because her mom's being an a** , I'll see to it that she gets everything she needs. |
loveis
Monk
36039 points | Good..I'm glad everything worked out..
and that his daughter has you in her life..must be a welcomed, and refreshing change from her mother. |
drummerwannabe
Minister
10559 points | I'm also glad everything worked out
That was a great way to handle the situation!  |
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