"Mizz Sunrise...xx"  tequila_sunrise
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Über-Minister
15807 points
17/F/In a dark alley, Australia
Join Date: Dec 2007 |
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Off to work till 4.
Leave me lots of luuurrrvveee!!
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My little girls growing up!!!!!!!
Happy birthday my lovely
Hope you have an awesome day 
xoxox | |
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Grrrrrrrr. I'm so f**king emotional right now and it's pissing me off!!
I was fine earlier today at the wake - I was even talking to a friend online like normal. Ive been alright around a few people lately.
But right now I'm sick of all this f**king dying s**t!!!!!!
I'm sick of feeling like s**t! I want it all to just go away!!!!
I went and bourght dinner for my family tonight and when I was waiting I kinda walked around on the path near the road and just walked alone.
I needed to be alone with my thoughts.
Walked along the main road....in the dark...in and out of the lighted areas...just thinking.
I'm still in my funeral clothes and I just want to keep them on.
It's so f**king hard right now.
It's the first time since Tanya's death that I've really been depressed.
Im so f**king depressed. I wasn't even close with my Great Aunt but my Grandma and Mum and Dad are sitting on the lounge talking about her and mourning and it's making me feel so f**king sad and useless.
People are dying around me and I can't help it.
Tuesday is Aunty Bubs funeral. I've gotta feel like s**t until then.
Someone save me  | |
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I said my final goodbye to a good friend today. Although I tried not to show it, it was so hard.
I cried the whole way through, and when it was time to go up to her coffin and say my final farewell, I broke down in my mums arms on the way up.
Rest in peace Tanya, I love you and you will always be remembered
My great Aunt also passed away today.... we weren't that close, but it's still a death.
I'm doing okay but | |
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Sleep. Big day tomorrow.
9:30 - get my tyres changed.
Then after that I gotta go to my old school and pick up my report
1:30 The funeral
Then I think I have to work that night.
Gahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
Im off  | |
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10 WHATS:
What was the first thing you thought about when you woke up?
Fuck my head hurts. Hmm 7am. Lets go back to sleeeeep!
What did you do last night?
I went to soccer training, had a fight with my dad and went to bed.
What is the most important part of your life?
Keeping focused.
And the people I care about.
What would you rather be doing right now?
I really don't think I can answer that without getting banned.
What did you last cry over?
Losing a friend.
And I will cry about it alot tomorrow.
What is your next day off and how are you going to spend it?
Tomorrow - Going to A funeral.
What always makes you feel better when you are upset?
Well the last thing that worked was hanging out with the person that makes me feel the best about myself 
What are you worried about?
How I'll feel after tomorrow.
What do you look most forward too this week?
Saturday - Family lunch in the city I haven't seen most of them for years!!
NINE HAVE YOU EVERS:
Have you ever liked someone while you had a girlfriend/boyfriend?
Yeah, at the start of the year.
Isn't it funny that I still want them?
Have you ever had your heart broken?
Yep.
Have you ever been out of the country?
Yeah.
Have you ever done something outrageously dumb?
I do that many times everyday.
Have you ever been back stabbed by a friend?
Ha.
Story of my life.
Have you ever had the cops called on you?
Yep.
Have you ever dated someone younger than you?
No
Have you ever read an entire book in one day?
Yes.
Harry Potter number two.
Have you ever got a speeding ticket?
No. But I have gotten ticket.
EIGHT WHOS:
Who was the last person you saw?
Mum.
Who was the last person you texted?
Laura
Who was the last person to call you?
Errm. I dunno.
Who is the last person you freaked out on?
Myself?
Who did you last hug?
Amy.
SEVEN WHENS:
When was your last shower?
Earlier tonight.
When did you last see your mum or dad?
Mum.
When was the last time you danced?
I don't dance.
Unless I'm heavily intoxicated.
When did you get married, or when do you want to
Whenever I'm ready and found the right person.
When did you last go to the movies?
Like last year
When did you last take a vacation and where?
Thailand, May 07
SIX WHERES:
Where do your grandparents live?
An hour or two away.
Where did you last hang out?
The library! Wooo Go me!!!
Where do or did you go to school?
I hate that place.
Where is your favorite place to be?
No where.
How sad
Where did you sleep last night?
In my bed
Where would you like to move?
Newcastle.
FOUR DO/DOES:
Do you ever wish you were someone else?
YEs
Do you have nightmares?
Yes
Does the future scare you?
No
FOUR WHYS:
Why are you best friends with your best friend?
It's a long story.
Why did you get a MySpace?
My friend at the time made me one.
Why did your parents give you the name you have?
No idea
Why are you doing this survey?
Boredom.
THREE IFS:
If you could have one superpower, what would it be?
Invisibility.
If you could go back in time and change one thing, would you?
Maybe.
If you were stranded on a deserted island and could bring one thing what would it be?
A certain male That would be fun!
Or a mobile phone that had reception to call someone to come and get me.
TWO WOULD-YOU-EVERS:
Would you ever get back together with any of your exs?
No f**king way
ONE LAST QUESTION:
Are you happy with your life right now?
Kinda/ | |
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Gahh
I got my hair cut.
Looks like I'll be attending two funerals in two weeks
I'm thinking of quitting soccer for good now. | |
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I think it's because I've been eating crappy food for a few weeks now.
The last few nights I have finally got some rest but I'm crazy tired, it's so unbelievable.
I'm off to go do some shopping - I have a family reunion on Saturday so I might buy something nice and new to wear
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This is the first time in a long time that I just don't know what to say to someone.
I've always been the person that says the right things and helps people.
I cant f**king do it right now  I just keep saying the wrong things.
Seriously feeling like f**king s**t right now and not coping with myself!!!
I promised that i'd be ok from now on, but even though she passed away and its a terrible thing, I've tried putting my own s**t aside to help them out.
I know its selfish but I just cant block it out any longer!!
It seems so silly to be depressed about life at the moment when my best friends family is going through hell and dealing with a death..
Im trying really hard. I really am.
I can't help being depressed at the moment. I'm still sensitive and I can't suddenly be mighty strong because my problems are far less awful than theirs.
I really wish it was like that
I hate being like this! I want to be the strong one that isnt so selfish at a time like this.
I'm going to try and get some sleep. | |
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Off to work.
