"I drink your milk shake!"  operaghost
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Über Master Debater
9465 points
24/F/Long Island, New York
Join Date: Jul 2007 |
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That I'm a selfish bitch.
Yep. That's me.
I've been dreading meeting up with one of my friends recently cause I know what she's going to tell me. That her & her man are going to moving in together, their gonna start planning their wedding and how her parents are going to pay for the wedding, etc etc....
I just can't be happy for her cause I can'thave these things.
I'm not going to be able to get my own place with my fiance anytime soon and well no one is able to pay for our wedding. I just feel like everything for us is a f**king struggle and some people get everything just too easy.
I really want to punch myself in the face for this, she's one of my good friends and I just cannot be happy for her.
I know she's got nothing to do with my current situation.. but I know when I hear it I'm going to have to fake being happy for her. Some part of me tells me she's going to see right through it.
What the hell is wrong with me... I should be happy for her, but I just feel intense jealousy and almost hate.....
I haven't been in the best mind set as of lately either with my moods and thoughts sky rocketing and then sinking faster than the titanic. Oh well. | |
vizzy
Über-Minister
17842 points | | If she's your good friend, tell her how you're struggling...how you really want to be happy for her, but right now it's just too hard because of how difficult things are with you and your man. And yeah, in all honesty eventually you should be able to feel good for people in their circumstances regardless of your own. That said, sometimes it really can be a struggle and it is ok to feel badly about your own misfortune...for a while. Just don't get stuck there or you'll get bitter. |
operaghost
Über Master Debater
9465 points | vizzy said:
If she's your good friend, tell her how you're struggling...how you really want to be happy for her, but right now it's just too hard because of how difficult things are with you and your man. And yeah, in all honesty eventually you should be able to feel good for people in their circumstances regardless of your own. That said, sometimes it really can be a struggle and it is ok to feel badly about your own misfortune...for a while. Just don't get stuck there or you'll get bitter.
Thanks  I probably will have to be hoenst with her and try to tell her that I am trying to be happy for her... It's just so frustrating when you see everyone around you just having it so much easier than you. It almost makes you feel like you've done something wrong or makes you question that it's perhaps fate telling you it's not supposed to be... I don't know, I think I'm just in a very down, bitter, confused state of mind. Perhaps my lack of sleep is causing my moods to be this way. |
bmobsessed27
Über Master Debater
7654 points | vizzy said:
If she's your good friend, tell her how you're struggling...how you really want to be happy for her, but right now it's just too hard because of how difficult things are with you and your man. And yeah, in all honesty eventually you should be able to feel good for people in their circumstances regardless of your own. That said, sometimes it really can be a struggle and it is ok to feel badly about your own misfortune...for a while. Just don't get stuck there or you'll get bitter.
That's very good advice. I know that if things weren't so s**tty for you, you would be happy for her. You are both getting married and things are working out better for her, it's understandable that you aren't as excited for her then would be. Don't be so hard on yourself. Vizzy had excellent advice, just let her know things aren't going so well on your end.  |
vizzy
Über-Minister
17842 points | | Lack of sleep will seriously get to you and mess with your mental state. Think about this-- I have a really good friend who spent most of her life living with very little. She lived around and went to school with kids who had so much more than she did. While everyone else was goign off on vacations and shopping sprees, she had to make do with what was available locally. (we lived in a third world country at the time so that was tough) The rest of us were brats...had everything while she sturggled. NOW however, she's gotten her degree, has a job in a field she loves, is married to a wealthy man, has a fab. house in a great city and just found out she's about to inherit a very large sum of money. All that to say, hang tough, life changes and good things can and do come around |
operaghost
Über Master Debater
9465 points | vizzy said: Lack of sleep will seriously get to you and mess with your mental state. Think about this-- I have a really good friend who spent most of her life living with very little. She lived around and went to school with kids who had so much more than she did. While everyone else was goign off on vacations and shopping sprees, she had to make do with what was available locally. (we lived in a third world country at the time so that was tough) The rest of us were brats...had everything while she sturggled. NOW however, she's gotten her degree, has a job in a field she loves, is married to a wealthy man, has a fab. house in a great city and just found out she's about to inherit a very large sum of money. All that to say, hang tough, life changes and good things can and do come around
I just hope at some point my fortune turns around for the better. But thank you for that, I'm glad to know that people in a similar circumstance like me were able to have it turned around.
I know I'll probably have to really work hard to get out of my current situation (and most likely move out of this state, it's impossible to afford any kind of house/apartment here! let alone a small wedding!) |
rpenn87
Über-Commander
187 points | | Everyone feels this way. But being able to admit that your a selfish bitch makes things alot better for yourself. You think your feelings are wrong, but they really arnt. You know that YOU work for everything that you have. Dont things mean more to you when you work for them, and dont actually have them handed to you? The struggle is the hard part, but the goal is the achievment. |
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I've decided..
