"I drink your milk shake!"  operaghost
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Über Master Debater
9465 points
24/F/Long Island, New York
Join Date: Jul 2007 |
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I swear this woman is going to push me over the edge with her ridiculous demands and her behavior. I think she's trying to push me so that I'll leave her son.
She's freaking out because after years of subsituting and monopolizing her kids time for a failed marriage (that she is still in btw), her son is engaged to me and doesn't spend as much time with her and the family as he used to. He's 24 years old.
There is nothing wrong with doing dinner with his mom once & awhile, she expects us to constantly do it and we are the ones who end up footing the bill for her share and the 16 year old daughters.
She thinks that if we are going out somewhere we should invite her. Seriously, she complained that we didn't invite her or her 16 year old daughter to go bowling with me, my fiance & some of our friends. Yes. That's right. A grown 57 year old woman wanted to hangout with her 24 year old son, his fiance and their friends.
She has no friends of her own, makes no attempt to even try.
Her 16 year old daughter is getting the worse of it right now. Poor girl isn't allowed to hangout with her friends after school or on the weekends.. it's very rare that she is allowed. There is always some false excuse as to why she can't hang out with this one or thatone.
My fiance & I wanted to take his sister over to Flushing for Bubble tea a few weekends ago. His mother wouldn't let us take her, we didn't know why. Apparently it was because we DIDN"T INVITE HER.
Sure none of this is directed at me, if I were to put everything she does I'd have 50 pages worth of nonsense.
She's always finding a way to put my fiance down. She's always praising his older brother.. the one who is in & out of jail, is a drug dealer, got a girl pregnant and doesn't stay with her, among countless over things. Need I also mention that older brother got arrested and mom in-law had to use money she saved fora down payment on a house as his bail money. She never got it back because he skipped out of town for his hearing. Yet this son is the golde god. Not my fiance who has a steady job, is engaged, is getting all his finances in line to get a car and be on his own two feet.
She wonder's why the oldest son doesn't want anything to do with her and moved on the opposite side of the country. She wasn't even invited to his wedding, wonder why?
Now her current husband (my fiance's stepfather, this is his mother's 5th marriage) and her fight all the time. She now says when she gets her tax check back she's going to move out.
We hope she does....
Boy I needed to vent a bit there... | |
loveis
Monk
35682 points | Run! Run FAR, and your fiance too - and don't look back!  |
operaghost
Über Master Debater
9465 points | loveis said: Run! Run FAR, and your fiance too - and don't look back!
Trust me, once our financial situation is worked out and stable.. he's out of there and wants nothing to do with her unless she can control her behavior.
Right now he just got a cell phone with me (he hasn't had one in over a year now) and he hasn't told her he got one or told her my new number. We don't even plan on telling her where we are moving, and won't tell her when it's happening until a few days before hand.
We need to get rid of this toxic person. |
loveis
Monk
35682 points | operaghost said:
Trust me, once our financial situation is worked out and stable.. he's out of there and wants nothing to do with her unless she can control her behavior.
Right now he just got a cell phone with me (he hasn't had one in over a year now) and he hasn't told her he got one or told her my new number. We don't even plan on telling her where we are moving, and won't tell her when it's happening until a few days before hand.
We need to get rid of this toxic person.
At least you are doing something about it, and setting your plan to action, no matter how long it takes..
keeping privy to the cell phone is a nice way to take back a good chunk of your so desperately needed privacy and alone time if you will..
..I feel so bad for you..and agree, she is toxic.  |
operaghost
Über Master Debater
9465 points | loveis said: At least you are doing something about it, and setting your plan to action, no matter how long it takes..
keeping privy to the cell phone is a nice way to take back a good chunk of your so desperately needed privacy and alone time if you will..
..I feel so bad for you..and agree, she is toxic.
He's had a rough time with her, he ended up with a debt that wasn't truly his. To make a long story short his mother was in the hospital fora few month and he & his sister were at home with the stepdad who is an alcoholic. He blew all his money on beer and had no money for food in the house. My fiance being 18 at the time used his credit card to buy food in the hopes his mom would give him the money. She didn't believe that her husband didn't buy them food no matter how much proof was put in front of her face, and his sister didn't help. His sister is too scared to stand up for herself. So he was left with a debt that he couldnt pay off quickly enough and then the interested added on... etc etc.
So a nice big chunk of his money was spent paying it off until recently. He just paid it off and next he's saving up for a car and then we can focus on a place we can afford then we are out. |
loveis
Monk
35682 points | operaghost said:
He's had a rough time with her, he ended up with a debt that wasn't truly his. To make a long story short his mother was in the hospital fora few month and he & his sister were at home with the stepdad who is an alcoholic. He blew all his money on beer and had no money for food in the house. My fiance being 18 at the time used his credit card to buy food in the hopes his mom would give him the money. She didn't believe that her husband didn't buy them food no matter how much proof was put in front of her face, and his sister didn't help. His sister is too scared to stand up for herself. So he was left with a debt that he couldnt pay off quickly enough and then the interested added on... etc etc.
So a nice big chunk of his money was spent paying it off until recently. He just paid it off and next he's saving up for a car and then we can focus on a place we can afford then we are out.
Consider yourselves lucky you had these things happen before you are married rather than after..your fiance, now realizing what he already knows, no matter how tempted he may be in the future to help, has these memories to reflect on and stop him from making any foolish mistakes..
take heed to his older brothers example, and get far away!
Good luck to you both, - may time be your friend |
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Fed up with mother in-law
