Tell Me What You Think!!!

kyguy2007

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36/M/Booneville, Kentucky
Join Date: Jun 2007

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Age:	36
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Location:	Booneville Kentucky United States
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kyguy2007
TFS Journal

Tell Me What You Think!!!
July 03, 2007 @ 05:22:27 am

Tell me what you think of this: It is the first verse of one of my songs that I write.

The love that you gave made me feel like a man in this world. The kisses that I felt made me think of the way life should be. But when the time had come and you were gone from my side and the life that I knew, slowly slipped away and the moments we shared were nothing but memory now.

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plaidmushroom Über-Meister 2439 points	July 03, 2007 @ 05:25:32 am 0 Kudos
	It's good. I like it. Keep up the good work!

jeanettesianrachel Ogler 27896 points	July 03, 2007 @ 11:39:32 pm 0 Kudos
	its good but you should change the word memory,cos thats kind of now to memeries cos thats more past and allows the poetry flow better,i hope you dont mind me saying that,but apart from that its lovely.

loveis Ogler 26645 points	July 03, 2007 @ 11:44:54 pm 0 Kudos
	jeanettesianrachel said: its good but you should change the word memory,cos thats kind of now to memeries cos thats more past and allows the poetry flow better,i hope you dont mind me saying that,but apart from that its lovely. DIT-TOE..other than that, it shows great promise.

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