"Guess what comes next.."  Tequila_Sunrise
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Ogler+
24935 points
18/F/In a dark alley, Australia
Join Date: Dec 2007 |
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Take a breath, take it deep
Calm yourself, he says to me
If you play, you play for keeps
Take a gun, and count to three
I'm sweating now, moving slow
No time to think, my turn to go
And you can see my heart beating
You can see it through my chest
And I'm terrified but I'm not leaving
Know that I must must pass this test
So just pull the trigger
Say a prayer to yourself
He says close your eyes
Sometimes it helps
And then I get a scary thought
That he's here means he's never lost
As my life flashes before my eyes
I'm wondering will I ever see another sunrise?
So many wont get the chance to say goodbye
But it's too late to pick up the value of my life
Current Music: Rihanna.
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I'm gonna go and have a hot bubble bath 
I've had a really stressful and tiring day and I deserve it..
No better way to spend the night after a nine hr shift | |
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You're a falling star, You're the get away car.
You're the line in the sand when I go too far.
You're the swimming pool, on an August day.
And you're the perfect thing to say.
And you play it coy, but it's kinda cute.
Ah, When you smile at me you know exactly what you do.
Baby don't pretend, that you don't know it's true.
Cause you can see it when I look at you.
And in this crazy life, and through these crazy times
It's you, it's you, You make me sing.
You're every line, you're every word, you're everything.
You're a carousel, you're a wishing well,
And you light me up, when you ring my bell.
You're a mystery, you're from outer space,
You're every minute of my everyday.
And I can't believe, uh that I'm your man,
And I get to kiss you baby just because I can.
Whatever comes our way, ah we'll see it through,
And you know that's what our love can do.
And in this crazy life, and through these crazy times
It's you, it's you, You make me sing
You're every line, you're every word, you're everything.
So, La, La, La, La, La, La, La
So, La, La, La, La, La, La, La
And in this crazy life, and through these crazy times
It's you, it's you, You make me sing.
You're every line, you're every word, you're everything.
You're every song, and I sing along.
'Cause you're my everything.
Yeah, yeah
So, La, La, La, La, La, La, La
So, La, La, La, La, La, La, La, La, La, La, La
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I'm not messing with your head.
I had no choice.
It was you or my family, and I chose them. | |
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Sometimes I wonder
And it hurts so bad that I have to do this - So bad.
How can I wake up every morning after dreaming about those eyes everynight and try and force myself into believing that i never felt nothing for him.
But whats done is done. I did it and now I gotta live with reality. And im sure his is a million times worse than mine right now.
I am not a monster.
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And Stressed 
Wish it would be over already. | |
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I feel like s***! And I feel like having a whinge.
I went in for my laparoscopy yesterday, was meant to be at 9:30 so we got to the hospital just before then, i didnt go in for my surgery until 11. I had to wait in a hospital bed and it was kinda depressing lol.
The surgery was meant to go for just under an hour but it went for 2. Finally found out why ive been having pelvic pain
They lifted up my uterus and just underneath they found a small patch of endometriosis. So that explains alot. They burnt it off and hopefully it wont comeback.
Im so sore today though, and i cant bend and can barely move. I can only just drive.
Its so depressing when u can only wash the top half of ur body, when it takes u five minutes to get out of bed and ten to put some pants on.
I hate this  I am so lonely. | |
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There is way too much emotion in the air at my house tonight.
We have one of Kenny G's album on and seriously it's going to make me cry. just by listening to it I can feel the emotion going around the place. The emotion my Dad's feeling, and the emotion that will be brought when my mum returns. All of this being negetive, and I really dont know why.
It's like every little bit of it is coming from the heart and it's making me want to just bawl my eyes out. I feel as though our family is just destined to fall apart and not get along. We are so unconnected and it really saddens me.
I have tried my hardest to pick up the pieces and fix everything but I always fail. It's really impossible to get along with eachother with out having such a selfish judgement about each other.
My brother is moving back home. Leaving his partner and my three nieces are going to have to deal with the break up. Its so messed up.
Every little part of this family has cracks and is falling apart.
Its been like this for as long as I can remember, with my parents separating and spending years apart, then getting back together, then splitting up and then divorcing and then getting back together and practically breaking up every night because they are f***ing alcoholics.
Man this is f***ing ridiculous.
So I'll just go back to listening to the blaring instrumental of the saxaphone and let it drum into my brain and completely ignore the bulls*** that is going on around me.
My mum will arrive home soon and my parents will fight because its completely pointless living under a roof with someone that you are no longer in love with.
They are both so judgemental and selfish towards each other and I feel sorry for the both of them. They both let each other down and its so heartbreaking to just sit back and watch it.
Theres nothing I can do to save anyone. Not even myself. I feel as though I am completely overcome by emotion right now. I cannot leave the house because I dont want to be alone. However, whats the point in staying here?
My brother will be here soon too, and he is not one of my favourite people right now. He is so disappointing too.
*takes a deep breath. | |
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Are to clean my house, room and car  | |
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