1.no im not married
2.no more booze for me
3.youre not my type
4.where are the toilets?i refuse to pee in the street
5.im going home as i have to get up early for work


you do what you gotta do

oh.. and.. "No Ociffer I'm not under the Alcofluence of Inkahol... **burp**


The next thing you say better be some Brilliant Mark Twain s**t cause its defenetley getting chizzled on your tombstone~~ Devils Rejects

I was watching this comedian, and he was talking about being drunk and was saying why American beer is so good. Like, it's last call for beer, can you say "heineken" after you just drank 20 beers? NO! But you can say "Bud".

The worst thing I've heard come from a drunk person was "Who invited girls? I can't have girls over."
I felt like slappin that guy. That's the most terrible rule I've ever heard and should be on a list of things not to say when drunk too.


"America Is all about speed. Hot, nasty, bada** speed."
-Eleanor Roosevelt - 1936

Yeah. Good and bad. Lol
But no girls allowed. That's ridiculous.
It's not like we're in the tree house we hungout in when we were 5 years old anymore.
Parties suck if its a big sausage fest.


"America Is all about speed. Hot, nasty, bada** speed."
-Eleanor Roosevelt - 1936

"Oh, I almost forgot. I was suppose to call my mom."

"No. No more alcohol for me. I have to go to work tomorrow."

no girls allowed...? are you nuts???


The next thing you say better be some Brilliant Mark Twain s**t cause its defenetley getting chizzled on your tombstone~~ Devils Rejects

Smiddy Wobenjagermanjenson....he was #1!


"My advice to you, my violent friend, is to seek out gold and sit on it."

If the drunkee is a guy. - "Screw chicks, dude. I just wanna dance!"

Cook**


Set me free, your heaven's a lie...