Malapropisms - Join The Conversation @ The Forum Site

Scapegrace

Rusty Bullet Hole, Washington

Dec 21, 2016 @ 23:11:52

What are some malapropisms you've heard? A malapropism is the incorrect use of a similar sounding word in a common phrase, for example, your parent might tell you that monsters are a 'pigment' of your imagination, instead of 'a figment of your imagination'.

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Eaglebauer

Moderator
Deleted

Saint Louis, Missouri

#2

Dec 22, 2016 @ 11:26:46

I met someone once in a mental ward who had obsessive compulsive disorder. His name was Toby and he said he had obsessive repulsive disorder.

True story.

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Edited: December 22, 2016 @ 11:27

Eaglebauer

Moderator
Deleted

Saint Louis, Missouri

#3

Dec 22, 2016 @ 11:29:08

Also, a girl I was dating once was ordering things from the Schwann ice cream truck and was asking for cherry flautas but said cherry fellatios instead. Not as a joke.

I married that girl.

I did later divorce her but still...

1

Edited: December 22, 2016 @ 11:29

mrmhead

NE, Ohio

#4

Dec 22, 2016 @ 16:00:15

My wife likes strong coffee.
Maybe I'll get her an expresso machine for Christmas

1

Mankysparrow

London, United Kingdom

#5

Dec 22, 2016 @ 16:31:06

my cousin was getting married and my granny went to buy him some gold cuff links, when she went into the jewellers she ask the man, "you got any of them there gold handcuffs"

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chaski

Stalker

Tree at Floydgirrl's Window,

#6

Dec 22, 2016 @ 17:19:21

People saying 'Pacifically" when they mean "specifically".

I've heard high ranking government officials, executives in big businesses, etc

I always want to reply with, "Atlantically..."

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magically_delicious

, California

#7

Dec 22, 2016 @ 17:48:07

My personal favorite is "all intents and purposes" being said as "for all intensive purposes".

Not the same, but I once was in a change of command ceremony when I was active duty where the Base General pronounced "epitome" as "epi-tome". I about died laughing on the inside.

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floydgirrl

Stalkee

Pope's Wine Celler, Holy See (

#9

Dec 22, 2016 @ 20:36:54

@Eaglebauer Said

Also, a girl I was dating once was ordering things from the Schwann ice cream truck and was asking for cherry flautas but said cherry fellatios instead. Not as a joke.

I married that girl.

I did later divorce her but still...

That reminds me of the guy I dated and he said "These condoms are nice" to my parents, the first time he met them. Like the first thing he said to them other than Hi. He meant "These condominiums are nice"

1

DiscordTiger

The Queen of Random

Administrator

Emerald City, United States (g

#10

Dec 23, 2016 @ 02:21:19

One time in college, There was really hot waiter at IHOP and one time when he brought us a to go box,my roommate tried to say "you have my undying gratitude". What she said was you can have my undying gratification."

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chaski

Stalker

Tree at Floydgirrl's Window,

#11

Dec 23, 2016 @ 04:40:36

It isn't the same thing, but why not highjack a thread if you can?

I "love" it when people say the opposite of what they mean: Someone will say, "I can't express in words how happy I am...."

And then you get stuck listening to a 20 or 30 minute speech...aka words expressing how happy they are.

Sorry...back to the malapropisms.

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Edited: December 23, 2016 @ 04:42

Eaglebauer

Moderator
Deleted

Saint Louis, Missouri

#12

Dec 23, 2016 @ 10:56:48

@floydgirrl Said

That reminds me of the guy I dated and he said "These condoms are nice" to my parents, the first time he met them. Like the first thing he said to them other than Hi. He meant "These condominiums are nice"

Yikes

What happened? I mean, did everyone just laugh it off? Gotta wonder if it was a Floydian slip.

(see what I did there?)

1

Eaglebauer

Moderator
Deleted

Saint Louis, Missouri

#13

Dec 23, 2016 @ 10:57:46

@chaski Said

It isn't the same thing, but why not highjack a thread if you can?

I "love" it when people say the opposite of what they mean: Someone will say, "I can't express in words how happy I am...."

And then you get stuck listening to a 20 or 30 minute speech...aka words expressing how happy they are.

Sorry...back to the malapropisms.

One of my pet peeves is when people say "I could care less" when they mean they couldn't.

1

mrmhead

NE, Ohio

#14

Dec 23, 2016 @ 16:17:22

@Eaglebauer Said

One of my pet peeves is when people say "I could care less" when they mean they couldn't.

Well, maybe I could care less - irregardless of what you may think.

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chaski

Stalker

Tree at Floydgirrl's Window,

#15

Dec 26, 2016 @ 04:45:01

@mrmhead Said

Well, maybe I could care less - irregardless of what you may think.

I hate it when people say oh fudge or golly reapers when they really mean Holy F__king Sh_t!.

I mean, really!!!!!!

Are you going to say, Oh fudge when an alien insect creature with acid blood is getting ready to bite off your face and take your head with it!?

I don't thinks so...

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