Adversity or Accommodation ?

How can current adverse practices be changed to accommodate rather take control and redirect ? How is it parenting upon certain conditions or permissions from strangers, security, and fostercare are pushed to be more important than families, dynamics, security, health, the qualities a child has, logical sequence and age appropriate knowledge of where the control is and learning by being and on the grounds of truthful and honest, but assumed parenting style treatment of clinical or global? and I can't let it go and not state that there are abuse and neglect cases to be seen to but my grandchildren had not been neglected, dependent, nor abused except with the beginning of this take over we encountered described ahead. It's almost as a child at 4 comes home from Pre-K during the month of December and says "don't eat grandmas cookies". Later on cookies were made and the child not eat one cookie grandma made. It could have been the healthiest or the least nutritious cookie ever made. Months maybe a year or two later cookies come out in the market labeled "Grandmas Cookies".