Divorce Lawyer

A London Divorce Lawyer died and arrived at the pearly gates.

Saint Peter asks him, "What have you done to merit entrance into
Heaven?"

The Lawyer thought a moment, then said, "A week ago, I gave a
50p to a homeless person on the street."

Saint Peter asked Gabriel to check this out in the record, and
after a moment Gabriel affirmed that this was true. Saint Peter
said, "Well, that's fine, but it's not really quite enough to get
you into Heaven."

The Lawyer said, "Wait, Wait! There's more! Three years ago I
also gave a homeless person 50p."

Saint Peter nodded to Gabriel, who after a moment nodded back,
affirming this, too, had been verified. Saint Peter then
whispered to Gabriel, "Well, what do you suggest we do with this
fellow?"

Gabriel gave the Lawyer a sidelong glance, then said to Saint
Peter, "Let's give him back his £1 and tell him to go to
Hell."