LIMERICKS:
(1)-
There was a young dancer named Priscilla,
Who flavored her c*** with vanilla.
The taste was so fine,
Men and beasts stood in line,
Including a stud armadilla.
(2)-
A sadistic young cook, Miss McDillet,
Gets very upset when you fill it.
When she's done and hops off,
She lops your thing off,
And sautes it up in a skillet.
(3)-
To an ancient divine of Tyrone
Was the art of rebushing c***s known.
In each c*** he would ram
A fine, prime raw ham,
And then deftly extracted the bone.
(4)-
There once was a man from Nepal
Whose turds were incredibly small.
He'd sit in a room,
And s*** on a spoon,
And then flick his turds down the hall.
(5)- Tea For Two.
A mother and daughter are sitting down over afternoon tea. The crotchety mother wants to show her daughter that she's still a hip parent by trying to get her daughter to open up and talk about her adventures in dating men.
Mother: So.... now that you started dating, what's it like getting intimate with young men?
Daughter: Oh you know how it is, men are always insensitive and never care if intimacy isn't working for me.
Mother: How so?
Daughter: Oh, stuff....
Mother: Really now, you can trust me. I think that it's important for mothers and daughters to talk about these matters..... Daughter.
Daughter: I don't know....
Mother: Now don't forget, I was a teenager once and I can remember what dating was like for me.
Daughter: Really?
Mother: Really... Daughter.
Daughter: Ok, for starters, how did you get their cum out of your eyes?