|For the last two years I've basically put my life on hold..|
For things i thought would be bigger and better than what I had. It's another reason why I think I owe TFS a good fraction of my time. I've met a lot of great people on this site over the years, ones who have changed alot of what I thought of the world.
Since April 2010 I quit school, put it on a back burner, and picked up a job at an Electronics Store near our Apartment. Things seemed to slow down, I had a 9-6 work schedule and it was pretty much everyday for those two years. Day in and day out, i took orders from my superior (also the owner)..I was his "prodigy", someone his children never became interested in becoming. As a to-be manager and rookie of that store I learned alot about myself and the vast diversity of people that came in everyday; the regulars, the one-timers, and the big-spenders, all of them could be impressed, showed an interesting fact/tip about anything and everything electronic...makes me laugh. I am the youngest one there, a good 30 years between my age of 21 and the second youngest at about 55.
There's so many funny stories and not-so funny ones I could tell. I wish I had the energy. I'm on my second bottle of Rose.
Listening to country music tonight, i've had this strange attraction to it since I met my fiance in 2007. If he only knew all the things I post here. If he could read everything I've written in these journals over the years, he'd have one hell of a trip. I've deleted a good portion of these journals. Some in disgust of the feelings and thoughts that I once had toward people. Some because I feel like a was overly dramatic, whats to say of a 15 year old? I thought I knew everything, I thought that the whole world revolved around me. It was a wonderful day, yes it was.
I've stopped writing poetry, mostly because I can't find the inspiration and i've run out of the NEED to. There is no need in poetry, and I'm having a harder time putting myself out there, in words, at least.
It's been years since I've actually written anything.
I wake up in the mornings now and I wonder where two years of my life went. I was a student, I was so fascinated with the world.
When your weak ill be strong
When you cant walk
scared to death
and cant take one more step
take my hand and we'll walk through it
im gonna love you through it.
thats whats playing. thats the song.
So i worked at this place for two years, i missed school, i missed being young. I am still so young! I don't want to grow up, i have the rest of my life to do that. I still want to party and be a college student.
I am actually one of the only people that realize what I need (in comparison to others I know.)
I wanted to go to school, I wanted to quit work. And because I've been blessed with an understanding and caring, hard-working partner, I was able to do it.
I am in my first semester since 2010.. I shouldn't be anything but happy with myself.
This is the beginning of a new adventure.
Glad I'm able to take the ride.
In fact, I'm in the drivers seat.
I understand this post is crazy, its about everything that comes to mind whilst in front of my computer. and congratulations to you for making it this far into the story. we've still got a long way to go.
I think I like blabbing with no point, feels like I'm able to say whatever the hell I want, with no needed context. Because honestly, who in their right mind would reply to this? lol. That'd be a sight.
I'll do this more often.